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Need some help please

BigSinnerBigSinner
edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
So, I have a coptic friend, who her parents fight all the time....her dad abuses her mom, and kicks her out of the house half the time, and has no respect for her most of the time. The girl isnt treated bad but her dad wont give her money for like anything ...clothes, gas money...college books, tuition...etc.....and the poor girl is so depressed she wants to take some pills and just end her life, she doesnt know what to do......she prays for the matters to calm down but they never do....or she wants to just leave the house and live in her own apartment...to escape from it all...but doesnt have enough money from her jobs to support herself, she is so sad, she doesnt want to live anymore.....any advice?

Comments

  • marenamarena
    if u can helper her by any way like see one of her closest friends that she can stay with. ask abona if he has any advice or where to go he might find apartment for her that doesnt need a lot of money some churches has palaces like rroms that pepole can stay ther but most important try too tell her self not to comit suicide and pray for her
    God bless u
  • whywhy
    recommend her to go to her FOC and is usuall with Communion

    also be a VERY close friend to her and always be there for her (that is if she is a good person ofcourse)
  • Unknown
    [quote author=why link=board=10;threadid=4071;start=0#msg56985 date=1151550417]
    also be a VERY close friend to her and always be there for her (that is if she is a good person ofcourse)


    I agree, but I think you should be a good friend even if she isn't a good person (family troubles like these are often the reason for people turning bad).
  • whywhy
    i must disagree as even though the casue of her being bad is unintentional, this situation will also impact you and if your friend that you will be very close to will drag you into the areas where she is bad at and then you are no longer a "help" but more like a companion who is very similar to her.
  • [Deleted User]
    so we are to ignore those in dire need due to a possibility of risk, due to our lack of faith in the inner workings of the holy spirit though us? Do we shirk our responsibility to God, humanity, and ourselves? If God, through the holy spirit, is using us as means of bringing his love to less fortunate souls, who are we to disagree? If God brings to our door a fellow human being in need of love, is it a christian act to deny that person the love and care of her heavenly father, who desires for her to rest under his wing?
  • nardinnardin
    [quote author=EpNomos EnTaio link=board=10;threadid=4071;start=0#msg57036 date=1151655243]
    so we are to ignore those in dire need due to a possibility of risk, due to our lack of faith in the inner workings of the holy spirit though us? Do we shirk our responsibility to God, humanity, and ourselves? If God, through the holy spirit, is using us as means of bringing his love to less fortunate souls, who are we to disagree? If God brings to our door a fellow human being in need of love, is it a christian act to deny that person the love and care of her heavenly father, who desires for her to rest under his wing?

    WOW EpNomos EnTaio, that was really strong and meaningful and awesome!
    My beloved 'BigSinner' as someone stated she NEEDS to get out of the environment ASAP she needs to get her mind off it all... go somewhere else and calm down. She also as someone else stated needs to talk to her FOC... maybe he can talk to the dad and sort out the problem ??? depending on the priest of coarse.... and as everyone else said again you really really really need to be by her side... no matter what state she is in. she needs someone to love her if she isnt getting it from her family.... if she cant stay somewhere else id advise you to take her to church etc. for lunch or whatever she also needs someone to care for her at this time as well. another pretty important point is u need to give her attention as well. maybe just a bit more than your other friends... praying for her ALOT.... i will pray for her as well.... dont forget the power of the alter its amazing... assure her all the time that God is there even though she may not feel it just keep reminding her how much God loves her and how much He is caring for her and will never leave her. as why said she needs to partake of Holy Communion regularly.... it would be nice if say 3 times a week or more if u wish either visit her... call her or email her or even mail her etc. just to check up on her and see if she needs anything and by that shell feel that there is someone there that cares for her... also mention it to abouna and ask him to visit the family and do as well phone visitations and when he sees her to ask her how shes going... a really good 1 that i experienced in a recent situation that would not only help her but you also is that abouna and a couple of friends and myself in the day pray at a certain time in the day and pour our hearts to God raising this issue... it not only lifts you up spiritually but when 2 or more gather in My name as Jesus said... it doesnt necesserily have to be in the same place but at the same time your all praying... i thought that was such and AWESOME idea so if u can get that happening between u and your priest its gr8!

    anyway i hope i helped and may God bless your efforts...
    +FROG+
  • Unknown
    FROG's advices are good and important steps to start with.

    We need to know more about her situation, if you kindly will (please use PMs if too confidential). Why does her father not give her money? Why does he abuse her mother? Is he in a desperate situation? For how long? Does this family have a FOC?
  • Saint MahraeelSaint Mahraeel
    DEF DEF try to help her to the extent of your ability. Pray about it, and remember WWJD? I def think you should stick by her side. Can you imagine if one of us was in that positin, wouldn't we want someone to help us?
  • sleepymusiciansleepymusician
    I agree with a majority of what's being said here, but at the same time, is there no other family member she can turn to at this time? No one who has the power to do something about her current situation? Personally, I'd say talk to abouna and ask him for help, but there's always the possbility that he might not be able to do anything immediately.......Continue being by her side. That's something you can do. Another thing is placing her name on the altar during mass. The power of prayer is immeasureable. God be with her.

    Sleepy
  • Kristina123Kristina123
    well u must support her but i think if its serious this should be reported no matter where u are in the world this activity is illegal!

    all too often people die from domestic violence situations and its serious

    u should speak to your confession father and seek his advice whether or not to report it this needs to be stopped no one should be treated like that

    Kristina123
  • joyisgod
    Kristina123,

    Your advice is solid, but can only be resorted too as the last and only solution.

    Domestic violence is a major problem but reporting it to authority will result in the break up of marriages and you know how our church feels about divorces. Something has to be done and the first step is going to a trusted father of confession and letting him take it from there, then if nothing happens and they have tried everything the authority can then be called in. However, a decision that is made hastily will affect all negatively and when one is upset and or angered they act irrational.

    Bigsinner,

    Pray for your friend and get a father of confession involved as soon as possible before the situation gets worst then it already has.

    In His Name
  • JeSuS_LuVs_UJeSuS_LuVs_U
    tell her to deffff talk to abouna.. but also God put her there for a reason so maybe she can just hold it out until she finished school , maybe get some financial aid or scholarship money from school , and have a steady life until shes out on her and able to support herself, she should use that house to her own benfit , if she has a bizy life she wont realli have to think about all those problems.. but she should talk to abouna he'll give ehr better advice.. i hope she gets better+
  • [Deleted User]
    they've said it. with abouna's permission, and after you have tried to deescalate the situation as much as you can, you should call the authorities. There a lot of organizations you could call that will keep things confidential and keep both you and your friend safe. that will a very convenient way of avoiding a fedee7a
  • fadyboutrosfadyboutros
    I read all the above replies, i think the best thing to do is not just be a friend, u should be her sister that she never had. make her feel that what harms her will harm u. One important thing to keep in mind is that helping ur friend is a great blessing for u, God will reward u for all u do in heaven. so dont be afraid in what u are going to do, even if it is going to harm u, because friends should help each other in good and bad times.
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