Married to a Non-Orthodox

I have been married to a man who is baptized Catholic. I am baptized Orthodox. A few years back, he introduced himself to my parents. He had told my parents and I that he was very interested in becoming Orthodox and that he loved it after he met with the Coptic Orthodox priest and attended the Sunday liturgy at our church a few times to learn more about Orthodoxy in an effort to be baptized at my Coptic Orthodox Church and finally happily marry me.
Then everything changed and I couldn't help myself...temptation was very great and I failed.. as I followed him away from my parents... he decided he wasn't ready for the whole conversion thing and that he was happy being Catholic. We were in love with each other and didn't want to leave each other, and the only way to do this was to leave my parents' house and run away. I lived with him until we were married after 2 years and of course I wasn't married inside my church, we were just legally married and had a small wedding with a few of our friends attending.
it's been 5 years since my tragic exit from my parents house telling them I'm leaving to live my life with this 21 year old, at the time, and thats what I was choosing.

I've been away from God, because I was scared. I knew he didn't accept me anymore, and that's just what I feel. .. I used to teach a Sunday school class at my church and I loved it, and wanted to continue but I was so ashamed of my myself I stopped going. What would be the right thing to do now. Can I continue to be married to this man and live my life as an Orthodox at church and with God and ask for his forgiveness? I just want God's acceptance and I want to feel His presence Again.

Comments

  • God always willing to accept everyone. But without wasting your time with my words, I recommend speaking to a priest about your desire to come back to the church.
  • How could you know "God didn't accept you anymore"? That is never true. God is accepting you and waiting for you always.

    I don't understand, did you not get married in any church at all? Is your husband a practising christian? What is your relationship like together? Is God part of it?

    It must have been a difficult few years, leaving your family and life like that. But I understand, human love can make us do crazy things.

    Your husband would need to be willing to be involved in church. What is his opinion about the whole thing now? Does he understand your guilt feelings and pain? If I was in a relationship, I'd hope my partner would be concerned about my wellbeing. I'd be worried if he didn't care about my feelings.

    Find a friendly priest and speak to him together. If your husband is trying to be a good person, he can make the effort to become part of your church and with a simple ceremony, you can be married in church. I can imagine some priests might be arrogant and unhelpful in your situation..avoid these ones, because what is done is done, you are already married. You need a member of clergy who will help rather than make the situation worse.

    I am coptic. But over the years I have opened my eyes to the fact that Catholics are christians too (provided they are actually practising and it's not just a label). Of course each denomination will claim that they are the right ones. so if your husband is a devout catholic, it may not be as bad as it seems. But if he is not living a christian life at all, I don't know what to say.
  • +AnonymouslyLoved,

    Do you have any children now? I think for sure, your parents sound innocent in all of this. They want their daughter back at the very least. 

    Why couldn't your parents let you marry him in the Catholic Church? 

    This sounds so sad... its not as if the guy was muslim and you had to convert to Islam like the countless other stories that happen in Egypt
  • edited March 2015
    Zoxasi,

    How is it that you make the assumption that AnonumouslyLoved herself was willing to convert to the Catholic Church. AnonymouslyLoved made it clear that her intention was that her husband converts, as planned. As well, from her description about Sunday school and love for the church, do you think it would be that easy for her to just leave? Finally, I don't think that her parents rejected the idea of her converting, it just seems to be as if it was never a consideration, again according to the plan.
  • Hi Joe,

    How are you doing habibi? 

    here's the logic in my head:

    For a Coptic to remain a Coptic its because they feel they have the fullness of truth, and don't want to go to another Church because the other Church is lacking in "Truth" - Correct?

    What is the point in having the fullness of truth, and because of it, you are living in sin?? 

    What is the point? 

    OK.. you could have said: "Im SO SORRY, Im Coptic Orthodox, I can't change my religion for you, so its over between us".

    But instead, what she's saying is "OK. Im Coptic Orthodox. I can't change my faith because of you, so what I'll do is live in sin with you instead" . Im living in sin with someone because I love my Church so much!!!

    Of course, the intelligent thing to do would be to say: "Well, I love you, you are the one that I'm happy with; why don't I see what is in the Catholic Church ? Are there Catholic Churches that are close to our Orthodox Church in terms of rites and practices? (Such as the Byzantine)".


  • Nobody is living in sin. So harsh of you to say that here. This is a married couple who need a little faith, that's all. Stop judging and diverting from the main topic. Offer solutions for the presenting problems, not the "would've should've could've" scenarios. What is wrong with everybody thinking they are self-righteous.
  • mnc_hnn said:

    Nobody is living in sin. So harsh of you to say that here. This is a married couple who need a little faith, that's all. Stop judging and diverting from the main topic. Offer solutions for the presenting problems, not the "would've should've could've" scenarios. What is wrong with everybody thinking they are self-righteous.

    im so sorry MNC, i was just answering Joe. Perhaps i should have sent a pm.

    having said that, she was living in sin. she left her parent's - and lived with this guy in sin before marrying him. What is so self righteous about that? I was just paraphrasing the OP
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