what if i do not want to tell abouna a sin

edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
if i do not want to confess to acouple of sins to abouna is there any other way to confess?
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  • If you consciously remember something and refuse to confess it, it is on your hands. You are responsible for it.

    No, there are no other ways to confess.

    Just confess it and be done! No need to keep waste on your spirit.
  • Actually, people right it on a paper and give it to Abouna if they don't wnat to tell Him, but not confessing it (like the concept itslef) is wrong (insert severus' previous post here)
  • It can be very hard to confess our sins to Abouna, but you must remember that he is there for YOUR sake and that he does not judge. Feeling ashamed of a particular sin is normal, but until you confess it you are a SLAVE to that sin...and I know all too well how this feels. I've heard of people writing it on paper for Abouna, that's a good way of forcig yourself to confess. "Just get it over and done with" has always been my personal attitude :P

    Matthew
  • then you don't have to confess it... now that is, but be ready to face God with that sin... yet He is merciful... but also is a fair Judge..."that You might be justified in Your words, and might overcome when You are judged."

    part of confession is humiliation... humiliate yourself in front of a human now, and you wont in front of God. back in the days they used to confess in front of the whole church, saint Moses the black, confessed in front of many.

    and when a person discusses confession, one should not stop himself of thinking about St. Augustine, who revealed his sins to people for hundreds of years!

    you can overcome the devil by humbling yourself!

    are you baptized now? because confession should be practiced when you are in the faith!

    akhdna el barka... neshkor allah!
  • now may i ask you a simple question (i am actually interested...): what do you mean by humble yourself?
  • knowing that you are weak... and you have to sin... and by confessing publicly or in front of abouna at least, you are exclaiming that you are weak, and you sin!


    nakhod el barak... so thank God!
  • bigee i have the same problem as you :( .
    Hopefully i will have the courage to confess soon.
  • well whatever the reason is as to why u dunt want to tell him, there is always a solution to it, u just have to think hard about it.. so for example,

    if u dont want to tell him because he sees u so often and u will think that he will think less of you,,,, then always remeber that out of all people around you, ur FOC is the only person who will never get ur confession into the general life... btw once u confess the sin,the priest is not allowed to bring it up again... coz imitating Jesus he has to always remember that once u confess ur sin it is "forgiven and forgotten"

    or if u dunt want to tell him because whatever ur doing is too risky and u think he might get involved (telling ur parents and so on..), then NO!! HE WILL NEVER DO THAT even if he's life is based on... he might try to convince you but he'll never do it hemself without asking for ur permission...

    and finally just remember that once u go into that room for confession, ur not speaking to ur abouna but ur speaking to Jesus himself, and since he already knows whatever u'v done, then why not get the forgiveness belmarra!!!
  • The priest is there to hear your sins AS JESUS, absolve you with the authority given to him by God, helps you if you need help as a spiritual father, and forgets your sins.
  • The idea of confession to an abouna is really not that comforting to me, maybe because I've never experienced it.  I'm Assyrian, so in our church we never do confession.  I think if you have a sin that you don't feel comfortable sharing with abouna, then don't say anything at all.  You can sit in church or in your room and confess to GOD.  Abouna can only hear what your sin is, but God can hear and see what your sin was. If you believe in God and believe that he is a forgiving God, than sit and speak about it, he’s always listening. One more thing, please people of this forum, don't over analyze this response, I'm entitled to speak my mind...please respect that...thank you.
  • in the Wisdom of Sirach, it's clearly said, "do not be ashamed to confess your sins"

    and in the old testament, the person to confess was to speak his/her sins to the priest, while he has his hand on the sacrifice! as commanded by God, thus making confession a mystery that was passed down to us by God Himself!

    it is NEEDED!!!

    akhdna el baraka... neshkor allah
  • [quote author=Nesto0129 link=topic=7211.msg95698#msg95698 date=1224119566]
    The idea of confession to an abouna is really not that comforting to me, maybe because I've never experienced it.  I'm Assyrian, so in our church we never do confession.  I think if you have a sin that you don't feel comfortable sharing with abouna, then don't say anything at all.  You can sit in church or in your room and confess to GOD.  Abouna can only hear what your sin is, but God can hear and see what your sin was. If you believe in God and believe that he is a forgiving God, than sit and speak about it, he’s always listening. One more thing, please people of this forum, don't over analyze this response, I'm entitled to speak my mind...please respect that...thank you.


    Matthew 16:18 - "And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven."

    Please explain this verse according to what your denomination teaches. Thanks!
  • to add tot he great verses above......

    Would you confess to an abouna, a Priest of God who was given the authority from God, NOW and be forgiven, or in front of EVERYONE on Judgement Day?
    You choose!

    Nesto0129, i take it that your church is NOT Orthodox.....
  • You don't have to go into details when confessing.  The most important thing though is that you have truly repented.  Confession without repentance is useless.
  • [quote author=grace08 link=topic=7211.msg95707#msg95707 date=1224128147]
    You don't have to go into details when confessing.  The most important thing though is that you have truly repented.  Confession without repentance is useless.


    i would say that you're supposed to say what you would say to Jesus as if He was there, though HE DOES come there.
  • [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95674#msg95674 date=1224099194]
    If you consciously remember something and refuse to confess it, it is on your hands. You are responsible for it.

    No, there are no other ways to confess.

    Just confess it and be done! No need to keep waste on your spirit.


    I totally agree.

    In fact, what am I saying, there is no agreement on this issue. Severus is stating a fact.

    Look, remember the story of Saphira and her husband?? They kept a sin in their hearts and they didn't want to confess it. They had good intentions and wanted to still give alms to the Church; yet, more important than their alms (their generosity) was the state of their heart, the KNOWINGLY lied to the apostles (the priests) and to the Holy Spirit. They didnt want to admit that they were hiding something. They gave the apostles the impression that they were giving ALL their money to God. Whereas in fact, they kept a part of it for themselves. Had they said "we will only give a certain amount, but not all" - this would have been very much welcomed; but they lied.

    I think we do that in confession: We tell abouna the good stuff (or not so bad stuff) and in our hearts, we don't say the real thing that God is looking for.

    Imagine you've just insulted your best friend badly; and stolen from him $10,000. You meet him again in a party by luck a few days afterwards. You discuss everything under the sun with him: The weather, the good times you spent, share a few jokes; but YOU NEVER raise the most important stuff: that you offended him and stole his money.

    He's just sitting there listening to you talk.. and it seems for an instant that you are just talking to yourself. Sure, God's there listening to you; but He's listening to you talk to yourself.

    Confession has to be a "Im Sorry. I've sinned" attitude, otherwise, you are just talking to yourself.
  • I have a question:

    What if there is no priest around where someone lives and you want to confess?

    I think you could just ask God to forgive you and confess to Him and all will be well. I don't know... just what I think.
  • well, you can confess by phone when there's no priest nearby...
  • [quote author=godislove260 link=topic=7211.msg95728#msg95728 date=1224190782]
    well, you can confess by phone when there's no priest nearby...


    to add to that......you confess by phone JUST FOR THAT EXCEPTION.....and the next time you take communion, you tell the priest that you confessed by phone for this reason, and probably confess again while that is happening, and he will ABSOLVE YOU. the idea is not to only confess with lips, but also to be absolved by a priest......which is the prayer that a priest prays upon those who confess with the cross upon there heads.
  • 1. Minagir is right about that. You can't confess on the phone for the sake of feeling less embarrassed...doesn't work like that.

    2.


    What if there is no priest around where someone lives and you want to confess?
    I think you could just ask God to forgive you and confess to Him and all will be well. I don't know... just what I think.

    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.
  • thanks for the replies. i see...

    [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95736#msg95736 date=1224196686]


    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.


    so we can confess to Catholic priests? or Eastern Orthodox priests?  hmmm....
  • [quote author=Hailemikael link=topic=7211.msg95737#msg95737 date=1224198807]
    thanks for the replies. i see...

    [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95736#msg95736 date=1224196686]


    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.


    so we can confess to Catholic priests? or Eastern Orthodox priests?  hmmm....


    With the permession of yourown father that you cannot physiclly go to him.
  • [quote author=minagir link=topic=7211.msg95738#msg95738 date=1224199306]
    [quote author=Hailemikael link=topic=7211.msg95737#msg95737 date=1224198807]
    thanks for the replies. i see...

    [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95736#msg95736 date=1224196686]


    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.


    so we can confess to Catholic priests? or Eastern Orthodox priests?  hmmm....


    With the permession of yourown father that you cannot physiclly go to him.


    Like I said, in cases where there is absolutely no other choice. I have stated that clearly.
  • Confession needs to be done face to face! habeiby where is the humiliation? a part of Confession is to be embarrassed of your sins... where is that?! one needs to acknowledge his sins, and be ready to say it to his/her father of confession... through embarrassment you'll learn how be overcome pride... which is the mother of all sins... you'll humble yourself, so you're learning the mother of all virtues! embarrass yourself... believe me, its much better than the awesome  day, when we stand in front of the Almighty God, and be embarrassed by Him, where He has to judge... to judge His fair judgment!


    akhdna el baraka... neshkora allah!
  • [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95736#msg95736 date=1224196686]
    1. Minagir is right about that. You can't confess on the phone for the sake of feeling less embarrassed...doesn't work like that.

    2.


    What if there is no priest around where someone lives and you want to confess?
    I think you could just ask God to forgive you and confess to Him and all will be well. I don't know... just what I think.

    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.


    Yes, that's true. You cannot confess on the phone for the intent of just feeling less embarassed. Not at all. That goes against the entire reasoning of confession. It is to feel embarassed. To add a sense of reality to what is going on in your heart. That's what needs to come out.

    But - i do think the Church allows confession on the phone if there's no way for you to see the priest - but I think someone needs to confirm this.
  • [quote author=Hailemikael link=topic=7211.msg95725#msg95725 date=1224189530]
    I have a question:

    What if there is no priest around where someone lives and you want to confess?

    I think you could just ask God to forgive you and confess to Him and all will be well. I don't know... just what I think.


    that wouldnt make much sense, because that would mean they dont go to church?
    They would just confess when they go to church, before/after the mass.
  • [quote author=QT_PA_2T link=topic=7211.msg95756#msg95756 date=1224244102]
    [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95736#msg95736 date=1224196686]
    1. Minagir is right about that. You can't confess on the phone for the sake of feeling less embarrassed...doesn't work like that.

    2.


    What if there is no priest around where someone lives and you want to confess?
    I think you could just ask God to forgive you and confess to Him and all will be well. I don't know... just what I think.

    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.


    Yes, that's true. You cannot confess on the phone for the intent of just feeling less embarassed. Not at all. That goes against the entire reasoning of confession. It is to feel embarassed. To add a sense of reality to what is going on in your heart. That's what needs to come out.

    But - i do think the Church allows confession on the phone if there's no way for you to see the priest - but I think someone needs to confirm this.


    I can confirm this, it's what I do...
  • [quote author=godislove260 link=topic=7211.msg95761#msg95761 date=1224269903]
    [quote author=QT_PA_2T link=topic=7211.msg95756#msg95756 date=1224244102]
    [quote author=Severus link=topic=7211.msg95736#msg95736 date=1224196686]
    1. Minagir is right about that. You can't confess on the phone for the sake of feeling less embarrassed...doesn't work like that.

    2.


    What if there is no priest around where someone lives and you want to confess?
    I think you could just ask God to forgive you and confess to Him and all will be well. I don't know... just what I think.

    What are the chances that you would live in an area where there are no Catholic or Eastern Orthodox priests? These can be an alternative IF AND ONLY IF THERE ARE NO COPTIC PRIESTS AVAILABLE.


    Yes, that's true. You cannot confess on the phone for the intent of just feeling less embarassed. Not at all. That goes against the entire reasoning of confession. It is to feel embarassed. To add a sense of reality to what is going on in your heart. That's what needs to come out.

    But - i do think the Church allows confession on the phone if there's no way for you to see the priest - but I think someone needs to confirm this.


    I can confirm this, it's what I do...


    Yes, it was what I had to do once. In fact, I just want to make something clear:

    It is actually much harder to confess on the phone than face to face. Its probably more embarassing and less effective (from my experience).


  • true, but when there's no other way, there's no other way...
  • [quote author=godislove260 link=topic=7211.msg95764#msg95764 date=1224271868]
    true, but when there's no other way, there's no other way...



    Godislove,

    You are seriously doing well. We both lived in the same countries, and you are doing much better than me.

    It's not easy. I think God will reward you for your steadfastness in trying to confess this way.
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