I hate praying

edited December 1969 in Faith Issues
I hate praying! it is boring! my mind wonders away and i cannot control it. i tried reading spiritual books, pray about praying ... nothing puts me in the mood to pray. i am dry spiritually and cannot stand it anymore. prayer is very important for me as it makes my day but lack of it puts me is despair. i feel like God has abandoned me and hates me. It has not always been this way, i used to like praying and doing spiritual exercises.

Comments


  •   Hello Brother,

    You said u hate praying. The word hate is a strong word for your state. You are not in a mood to pray. That is natural for we who lives in the flesh. Bacause prayer is of the spirit and not of the flesh.
    First you should be checking out if you are balancing your spirit and flesh weight. The flesh wars against the spirit as St.Paul has said. Make sure your body is not mastering your soul. Do you eat and drink as a Christian? Do you fast often? Fasting is the mother of prayer. Your prayer mood is always proportional to your body state. The weaker in body the stronger you will be in the spirit. Remember also the moment you stand for prayer the enemy will also stand to fight you. If you are full in stomach and your mind is filled with worldly thoughts then you are already lost the battle.
    Second you should be searching if you are walking in sin or there is anything you hide in your heart that you did not confess. God loves sinners but hates sin. The more pure your heart is the more your soul is ready to talk to God. Prayer is talking to the Almighty and we all want to talk with someone with whom we have a good relationship. The feeling of guilt will draw you back from God. Confession is the only way to clear your heart from guilt.
    Third try to pray smaller prayers with full attention and love than trying to immitate the desert fathers by praying long prayers without true love. All of us pray as much as we are able.
    Last of my comment, when you stand for prayer think of it as a gift of God which you never deserve if not for His mercy. You are extremely priviledged to talk to the Creator of this Heaven. Humble yourself. We are all unworthy servants of God. Think of the Martrys who take real pain. Prayer is a comfort. Think of those who do not know a single prayer and do not have the priviledge to know God. God has loved you till death. Are we bored to talk to Him? He asked so little compared to what He has done for us.
      I am advicing myself too because I feel the same way about prayer sometimes. But I don't hate prayer but I hate myself for what I feel.
  • thank you for your answer. My God reward you for it.

    I do not drink alcohol or other harmful liquids and eat just like everybody else which means more than just to satisfy hunger.

    I keep all the fasting ordained by the Church but I fast with my body only not the soul.

    Worldly thoughts come to me always when I pray. I start thinking about stuff that happed long time ago and there is no need to contemplate on them at all.  Even if I try to concentrate my mind very hard on what my lips are saying my heart is not connected to the words thus I drift away without even noticing.

    I do not hide anything in my heart ( I just went to confession ) but I do have many sins that I know of let alone the once I don’t know of.

    I abandoned the prayer on Abaya and decided to use my word only ( of course they are nothing comparing to the richness of Abaya). This tactic has not worked either. Now I just come and sit in silence before God (but even than my thoughts wonder away). 

    The fact that prayers is a privilege and that I stand infant of God when I ”pray” do not move me at all. I have not reverence for God.

    As I mentioned, it has not been always like that.  I used to love praying and I would talk to God, give him my worries and problems and I would always receive back either a solution to a problem or grace to fight a sin or just warmth and comfort. Now it is all gone. Once I stood up for prayer an cried since I could not pray, the same day during the night prayer I cried for God gave me a grace to pray with my heart.

    I am so confused and desperate for a solution and God since to be silent to my cry for help.
  • Hey Klara

    Believe it or not I can sympathise with what your going through.
    I'm also going through a similar thing right now, but I know that is because of my sins. I feel like such an idiot when I pray, like how could someone like me dare to even mention His name. I keep thinking that every time I sin, it means that I have gone further than God can reach, and that He has disowned me. Given me up because I am just too sinful. I just keep begging for mercy and hope that God can forgive me for what I've done, even though I've done it again and again and again. I do really feel, abandoned, like you said.
    But deep, deep down, I know that there is nowhere God cannot reach, and I keep trying in the hope that eventually, I will remember what it feels like to pray to God in confidence and in love.

    I think we all go through phases like this, different obstacles that the devil puts up to stop us from growing closer to God. Stuff like this always happens when we are really feeling progress in our spiritual lives. The devil hates progress but he hates us more. He enjoys seeing Christians stop praying to God in love and fellowship and instead seeing us hang our heads in shame or just plain feel empty.

    Btw, one of the things that helps me pray is to sing the Tasbeha or even just sing the Agbia prayers in tunes from the mass. I am a very muscial person so that really helps me to get into what I'm saying.
    [quote author=Klara link=topic=7003.msg93506#msg93506 date=1217849380]
    I have not reverence for God.
    Maybe its a faith problem...I mean with me, like every kid, until I was like 12 or 13 I didn't really have faith I just prayed because my culture told me too, you know, my dad is a priest and whatnot. I was going to church every Sunday and praying and reading the Bible, but it was a chore, something I had to do. But then as I grew, I started to question my faith, and started investigating whether or not Christianity is really substantial or not. And MAN is it substantial! After that, I stopped praying to the floor and the wall and whatever else was around me when I was kneeling, and started praying to Jesus Christ the historical and spiritual figure who is very much alive.

    God bless you and I hope you find peace! I'll pray for you! ;D
  • [quote author=Klara link=topic=7003.msg93504#msg93504 date=1217840429]
    I hate praying! it is boring! my mind wonders away and i cannot control it. i tried reading spiritual books, pray about praying ... nothing puts me in the mood to pray. i am dry spiritually and cannot stand it anymore. prayer is very important for me as it makes my day but lack of it puts me is despair. i feel like God has abandoned me and hates me. It has not always been this way, i used to like praying and doing spiritual exercises.





    Well, why not try a spiritual retreat somewhere?? The European conferences are great, but its too "fun fun" - u know? Its hard to actually pray in there unless they hold a mass.

    Also, pray in a group. This is really good. God recommends this also.

    Now, I'm in NO WAY suggesting that u should abandon prayer, or neglect it, but I feel its really important to read the Bible. Daily.

  • Well...

    When you concentrate at sin you at this moment don't concentrate at God. You focus on guilty, on law, on flesh, on body not God, His forgiveness, mercy and love. You have to regret sins, confess them (I don't now how this looks like in your church because I'm catholic) and forget them the same way God forgot them.
    God can reach you everywhere and everytime but... you have to ask Holly Spirit for help, read Matthew 14;30-31 and 1 Cor 12;3.
  • Prayer is not boring, the greatest things happen when you pray, and the devil cannot fight against your prayer, because when you pray the Lord fights for you. So the only thing satan can do is convince you not to pray, or to pray a meaningless repition of words.

    I preist once told me that prayer is a struggle, its not something that calms you down, when you pray at the same time you have to fight satan, for your prayer to mean something and for you to start feeling your prayer you must pray hard. Meaning anytime you notice your losing focus thats the devil kicking in, so fight against it and try to focus even harder. He will attack EVEN harder, but you keep fighting and get through the prayer. Its not easy, but the more you fight youl find that near the end of you prayer you actually dont want to stop praying and thats when the Lord stepped in removed satan from interupting you because you were determine to REALLY pray to Him, prayer is the connection between man and God. When you pray, good things happen, when you dont bad things happen. Ive noticed it, and im sure you have too.. Just like when you said "prayer is very important for me as it makes my day but lack of it puts me is despair."

    Keep praying.. God Bless
  • Hello Brother,

    I have read the posts and loved them. Hope you have picked at least one or two sentences that could help.

    You know, The Psalms are the greatest prayers ever. St. David has written them really adorned with humilty, a virtue which God loves most. Pray the Psalms more often. I am certain that you can find the exact words you want to say to God inside them. Every spiritual feeling is described in it. The psalms are like a ready made words that really fit all our situations in this life. Even it is said of the psalms that " Any other prayer must use the psalms as a raw material. "  God loves the psalms more than any other prayer just like St. Mary loves the Glorification Prayer of St. Ephraim the Syrian. I have actually heard this from a trusted book. Pray the psalms and you will notice the love and the peace of God covering you like the greatest blanket.

    If you think you are being fought by the enemy often, then pray these two psalms more often. Psalm 27 and Psalm 91.
    The one that starts with
        Psalm 27...1"The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?" ...

        Psalm91...1"He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty." ...

      I have read a story just like ours. Someone like you and me asked an old holy father the similar question about prayer. The old man answered him " Continue to pray even if you don't understand what you are praying about. Always know that the enemy understands it more than you and will flee before you. So, continue to pray."
      Another time someone asked a holy father " Father, how can I learn to pray? "
    The holy father answered " You can learn about how to pray by praying. "

    You can read inspiring real stories from the real person. The ones who pray a perfect prayers. Read the " The Desert Fathers " and any book written about them. Stories of holy fathers. They will tell you advice of a life time with one sentece.

      Well, may God help us all to pray a prayer that pleases Him not us. That comforts our Spirit not our body.

     

  • [quote author=binC link=topic=7003.msg93533#msg93533 date=1217940988]
    Hello Brother,

    I have read the posts and loved them. Hope you have picked at least one or two sentences that could help.

    You know, The Psalms are the greatest prayers ever. St. David has written them really adorned with humilty, a virtue which God loves most. Pray the Psalms more often. I am certain that you can find the exact words you want to say to God inside them. Every spiritual feeling is described in it. The psalms are like a ready made words that really fit all our situations in this life. Even it is said of the psalms that " Any other prayer must use the psalms as a raw material. "  God loves the psalms more than any other prayer just like St. Mary loves the Glorification Prayer of St. Ephraim the Syrian. I have actually heard this from a trusted book. Pray the psalms and you will notice the love and the peace of God covering you like the greatest blanket.

    If you think you are being fought by the enemy often, then pray these two psalms more often. Psalm 27 and Psalm 91.
    The one that starts with
        Psalm 27...1"The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?" ...

        Psalm91...1"He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty." ...

      I have read a story just like ours. Someone like you and me asked an old holy father the similar question about prayer. The old man answered him " Continue to pray even if you don't understand what you are praying about. Always know that the enemy understands it more than you and will flee before you. So, continue to pray."
      Another time someone asked a holy father " Father, how can I learn to pray? "
    The holy father answered " You can learn about how to pray by praying. "

    You can read inspiring real stories from the real person. The ones who pray a perfect prayers. Read the " The Desert Fathers " and any book written about them. Stories of holy fathers. They will tell you advice of a life time with one sentece.

       Well, may God help us all to pray a prayer that pleases Him not us. That comforts our Spirit not our body.

     





    I agree with BinC one hundred percent..Great Words..Psalms are a prayer that is already made and St. Athanasius says, "Singing Psalms is a medicine for healing the soul."

    Also I read in one Book that Fr. Martyrius said that one of the Saints says, "Let psalmody be continuous, for when God is named, He causes demons to flee."

    One of the Monks came to His father and asked him saying, " Father, I feel nothing when I read the Bible or pray." so the Father told the Monk to go to his cell and read the Bible for 40 days. Again the monk came after the 40 days and said I felt nothing. so the Father told him to read it for another 40 days. After 40 days, the monk came to his Father and said again I do not feel anyhthing. Then the father said to take a basket and fill it up with water. However because of the material of the Basket, the water will not stay in it but drain from the bottom. The Monk tried various times to fill up the Basket with water but it will still drain. So he came to his father saying, "I couldnot get the water to stay in the basket." So the father asked him saying , "was there a difference of the basket before you put the water and after, and the monk said that everytime i put the water and it will drain, the basket gets washed and becomes whiter.

    So the Father said, "This is right, everytime we pray, without noticing, our souls are being cleaned and when we read the Bible, Even if we do not understand it at the time, but it purify us without realizing it."

    My Father of Confession says, "Prayer is like a Hill, climbing it at first is the hardest part but when you get half way, it becomes so easy and used to."
  • Well hate is a strong word.  But i understand that you prob just hate doing it.  What you can start off by is listening to songs.  And every few hours say " God i lOve you".  You should spend sometime talking to abouna. he wil give you some type of excercises.  And then well this might sound kind of silly but  when i was younger i used to carry a cross everywhere i went in the house.  So you might do that.  It might get you attached to teh cross which is salvation and teach you how to lift up your arms and pray.  you could try starting to pray the model prayer:Our father who art in Heaven" when you get in teh car or when you eat.  You could read a psalm each day and then perhaps work your way there. 

    /
    mahraeel
    plzz p4m sister in Christ

    And remember when life knocks you down on your knees, it is the perfect position to pray=)
  • Please delete this message, I've made a mistake.
  • Thank you all for your kind answers. May God Bless You for your help
  • May God bless you for the valuable lesson. It is just amazing how lazy we r all Christians of this generation compared with the former ones. Reading The Bible for 40 days in cell? 
    God please help me to read The Bible even for an hour a day in my comfortable home. No wonder we as a generation r dry and without a real fruit. We r actually reaping what they saw even that we r eating now spritually.
    May God give us all the Oriental Orthodox Church memebers the grace of the former Christians. 
  • What are some examples of wordly thoughts that distract prayer?

    Maybe I have them too but don't notice they are wordly or from the enemy.  If they are worries about life well we can give our worries to God so I don't see them as bad.. just to tell God about them


  • Hello Brother,

    You know what? any thought that is not directly related to what u r praying about is a distraction. Our weakness plus the enemy will play a great role in pull u down from the state of real prayer.
    Forget all the nonsense thoughts of this world. It can be as good as giving alms, visiting a prisoner or a sick neighbour. Even with this good intention will the devil fight u to disturb ur connection with ur Heavenly Father. Please notice the thoughts very consciously then only u will wonder how much the flow will increase the moment u stand for prayer.   
    There is always a time for everything. You ought not to think of giving alms while u r praying. Infact there is no greater service than praying. Without prayer everything u do is nothing but full of pride. The devil will not always fight u with dirty thoughts but also with clean ones but out of place and time.

    Ecclesiastes 3 (King James Version)

    1To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

    2A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

    3A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

    4A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

    5A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

    6A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

    7A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

    8A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.


    A time to pray is a time to pray. All the doors of the world shut.

    I love advicing myself:)

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