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oh wait, i called you a heretic...........am sorry, i dono where did i ever say the word but my be you understood it.........so what...u said ur "old" and lived "life" on it's fullness. than take it like a man or a 20 yr man if am not mistaken.i would just like to see all the "scriptures, priests, and bishops" that you're talking about that will back up what you said. please go head and do that, my email is : [email protected] you can ask any "priests and bishops" who can back you up. and i really don't care of ur 20 or 40, am still right of what i said above.
but oh well... as I said earlier i will go ahead and back up everything I said right here on the posts...
you’re right... okay good for you you wanna a cookie? its your opinion... nothing more! just like im saying mine nothing more...
btw way my statement was not addressed to you... but I guess you like to assume without reading and understanding... lol...
its okay many people are like that... but why i mentioned the age... is as the bible says "respect your elders,"
not saying everything I say is right, but when you call an elder a heretic, then you are disrespecting the bible and what it says... LOL isn’t it funny how people will take bits and pieces of the bible and think they know it all... lol... but oh well... I will come back with all the biblical scriptures that "back me up," so we can go back to the original reason of this thread... so also I don’t get accused of going astray from the topic.
[quote author=vassilios link=topic=5102.msg68588#msg68588 date=1173906903]
Superman, i do understand TOTALLY what u are saying; but as i said, its not relevant to my topic. I just wished to know , as Coptic Christians, when dating a Coptic girl, what questions can/cannot be asked. Period.
Let me put this simply, there is no fixed set of questions that you can/cannot ask a person. As you begin your relationship with a person, you get to know them and develop an understanding of their personality, who they are, and how they think. This is how you can gauge what sort of questions you can and cannot ask. It varies from person to person, but once two people have committed themselves to each other, and agree that they wish to deepen their relationship in a way that will lead to marriage, you can begin asking personal questions about their past. If they are at all uncomfortable, do not push the matter until a time when they do feel more comfortable to discuss the issue. In the end, if there is true love between two people, there are no secrets. Again, this is the case for two people who are pursuing a relationship that will lead to marriage, and not aya kalam.
Please pray for me.
WOW! and you said you read the posts? LOL... homeboy, a twenty year old knows more than a nineteen year old... a twenty year old has lived much more than a nineteen year old... has gone through much more, than a nineteen year old... again... I never said I lived life to the fullest... i don’t know where you’re pulling this out of
Well there is people who don’t understand everything according to their age. Age is meaningless if it’s not accompanied with the right format of knowledge. am waiting, but please let’s make this private or at least on a new topic. I replied to every sentence you have said and it says that in the post. When you replied back and quoted what I said in general, you attacked me in general, not my words which I wrote down to quote you. So who’s assuming without reading and understanding. hhhhmmmmmmm, this is a public and a live forum …rit people. Someone correct me if I am wrong. so wait, now ur including the bible….wow….really amazing……
anyways, I respect those who deserve respect except with some exceptions which don’t apply to you as I see it. LOL is right when you said. But wait, where is it coming from, oh from a guys who still can’t prove me wrong and thinks he’s older than me. Wow.
And again with the bible…………………
SuperMAN(BAM), please if you have more words to say (which I am 100% sure of), please open a new discussion.
now tihs is all "i thikn" stuff... ask ur father of confession so ur not hearing wrong things...
People - Please take your personal discussions and side arguments/conversations to another medium (email, PM, etc..)
I want this topic to get back on its original track or I will end it.
[quote author=vassilios link=topic=5102.msg68590#msg68590 date=1173907553]
Well, u too have misunderstood: When u've reached the point where u can ask "personal" questions, What questions can u ask!!? ???
How exactly have I misunderstood you? There are NO set questions that you can ask your future spouse. You can ask them pretty much anything (within reason, and this should be apparent). They should be like an open book to you, and you to them. Ask them about their past. Ask them if they've had a boy/girlfriend, if they've ever kissed another person, how far they've gone with another person (if in fact they have even been with another person to begin with). Ask them what their hopes and dreams are, how many kids they would want, what they expect in a husband/wife. I'm not sure what else you want.
Please pray for me.
Where do I start…well very good topic again.
Let me just address very quickly
Is everyone fasting
Is everyone here before posting said a word of prayer if r angry I guess u should do that and then post I think it makes a difference compared to what I was going to blow up on here.
Wow interesting topic... but hey lets talk about it with common sense, leave confession out of it… if a Girl was screwed, I would never think of marrying her… “once a whore, always a whore” if she did not protect her body when not with you, what makes you so sure she would when with you? You will not like it and it will be a failing relationship, and it’s a part of the manhood, not to overlook such a thing! Some people do repent… but you know what, how do you know they wouldn’t do that again… this topic is actually a really good topic… but ya a man needs to know all past experiences of his future wife… and has all right to let her go if he knows of things that would not make her worthy to hold his name! One more thought…. Imagine you and your wife are talking, all happy in a store… and one of the guys that screwed your wife were there, how would you feel? Leave confession out of it, leave religion out of it… just use your common sense… and what would make you comfortable in the future!
Firstly very vocal. with all humility that part of the statement is wrong. U know and u should have accepted it instead of putting on with ur ego and pride. Especially when u had been replaced with versus from the bible. It is true those who fail to humbly listen to are very likely prone to being a heretic….e.g. Arius in this case many disagreed with ur statement. Go to ur Abuna and say these words. I bet he will be very displeased. If he isn’t then I have been a fool! Now my take on this not from the bible but from our church.so many great saint whom u would not worthy to kiss their hands of and here u are rambling on and on with ur self.
The first person I would mention that should have come on everyones mind and finally correct ur way of thinking is of SAINT MARY THE EGYPTIAN. Truly indeed she was a whore she confessed of this to the saint bemwa the priest. But she proved truly that the second part of the statement was not wrong…truly indeed she suffured many days the devil fought her in the manner of saint Anthony yet she prevailed why why superman why? U all mis out on some very important point here. It its because she finally chose to be with God to repulse herself from that filth and be part of Gods kingdom…truly indeed this is a right and worthy path to follow filled with promises and blessings! Saint Mary the Egyptian from all lustfulness of sin achieved to be a saint through repentance and seeking God. Here once again was highlighted the power of repentance and what one can achieve if the person condition of the spirit and heart are in the right place. Listen my friend. She was an ordinary prostitute. Id anything compared to any other u guys will come close she above all had the more urgency and desire and temptation to go back to those sins but did she no why because God was with her and her sins were forgiven. In this case even if she had sinned again I swear she would have returned back to the lord why because ones the soul knows God and has tasted God and his righteousness it knows where it belong and it will friend it way back….otherwise if he/she doesn’t he will grieve his soul just like lot did. Of st Mary suffered and but she prevailed there fore u must correct ur self and understand this matter. Another e.g. would be st Moses the strong/black he was in the same boat as saint Mary the Egyptian. And yes I would get married to st Mary the Egyptian any day.
If u still cannot see pass what I am trying to say then u have hardened ur heart and devil has achieved his purpose.
And for the sake of God do not boast about how many posts u have made that is worng because the one u made above count in there and those certainly bring ur name down.
I will not even mention the age issue it is absolutely out of context.
Now vasillos brother how is it that this matter is confusing to u
What I said above matters as well to u.
Repentance and confession is a very powerful tool. When a person I is performing it he does it with a direct link to God.
Remember Abuana is a servant of God all he does is empty the rubbish been he doesn’t deal with the Rubbish he hands it to God his grace and mercy clean it all through his son our Lord Jesus Christ. It is like Abuna bringing to God a note of confession like we do as deacons for the congregation. When abuna performs the office of repentance and confession he does it so with the grace of God given to him remember the confession of st Moses the strong…to st priest Isidore. What happened. So in this likeness u must not doubt the sacrament and its power. By doing that u…well u know u r doing a lot of wrong things….so when u say u want to know everything that is wrong its like saying to anyone tell me what u did… u told God and I need to know….u r bringing ur self up to Gods level.
And I can keep going on about this and other stuff but to refocus what ur foc said was in no way wrong absolutely no one is to discuss what u said about what in confession it is between God and that person no mater the person is ur wife son or daughter or grandmother.
Now u also raised a valid point. Of course let us just focus on marriage and engagement for this topic.
If r in this process of there are important things that u need to now about ur wife if she is married. Or certain things u might want to know if ur engaged…
Void of this information matter wether u r in love with the person u r talking about and where is God in this relationship u feel this aspect and apart from ur love for this person u must spend lots of time in prayer and fasting for this person and this relationship that u r starting.
Depending on ur spiritual level u will deal with the information given to u .i.e. what ever it is she tell u but that is not the way to deal with it for u see when super man told what he gave as ‘his view’ he spoke from what he felt and what and how he wants it to be sure u can do that but God doesn’t call us to do that God calls us to follow him so no matter what it is wether it comes up late or before u must follow God and see where he leads maybe having a sexual disease was ur cross who knows…so all in all when u r in love with some on and both feel this from God then u can deal with it throw away all this worldly view. But in this realistic world not many are like that so we must modify
So here it is as ur responsibility if u r in confession lets say and u confess abuna I am married I know but the other night I was in the pub and I happened to see this pretty girl and dam deed a I committed adultery. I feel terrible and I want to repent. Of course abuna will tell u what to do. But after that guess what u have a confession to make to ur wife…that part has got nothing to do with revealing confession or anything of that matter. What now is how ur wife is going to deal with u. how she will take ur repentance. Sure the chances are she ill want a divorce but that is her call not ur after all the bible says who can carry fire against their chest and not get burnt..
Now because u chose these radical points my answers are also by that far fetched lets look at this one
a) Imagine if a girl had an abortion, to the extent that she can no longer have birth - its important to know whether a girl can have kids or not?
b) Imagine if a girl's ex boyfriend was still in love with her?? I mean, then what happens?
c) Imagine if She was ever in prison and on probation and didn't really tell u.
Answer to a
Now that is an important information. Of course she has to tell u that and then it is for u to decide how to take it. has got nothing to do with confession. Of course u will want to know the details of the act. In this case u will need to see her say level of repentance and of course u just wanna know the whole story. So both must go to the foc and talk. Before that of course foc will talk to u and see how much infor u can handle and adjust to in a godly manner. Of course important issues like this will result in big decisions to be made. Then u will ultimately decide which way u wanna go wether u believe that she will go and do that again or not. I would personally pray about it and see what God thinks about it. This does not in any way say or she must have confessed so its ok she wont do it again. Last week I confessed that I wasn’t going to drink but I still did. I fell. But what matters what one person does no matter how many time he falls if he gets u he/she in the eyes of God is acceptable. Now of course u might not think or follow that and their for that will reflect in ur decision u make.
Doesn’t matter whether she tells u before or after. The decision u make is what u will make the only hope and desire is that when u make the decision God is with u and supports u.
This question is not of any help to u but rather will cause u to fall. That is why I say if there are important things that u think ur wife should know about first talk to God (pray and fast)and then talk to ur foc. And see what he thinks and then disclose that information. In this case I would nt tell u that some one else has got a huge crush on me if I was to be a girl engaged to u. because that will only bring to u war from the devil. I would still mention it in confession. But again stuff like this u will see in real world. Many times, u might eye some body else despite the fact u r marred or engaged. And please why doubt that she will hook up with some other guy who is in love with ur girl. Common if Gods with u and u know u can fulfil all aspects the best u can and it is acceptable then God wouldn’t lead u to this, he wants the best for u right. So why doubt just have faith he will protect u and ur new engaged girl! Of course if u r girl falls that’s her burden sure u will get hurt but that is not for u to decide what happened has already happened then deal with the consequence perhaps GOD has a better plan or if nothing then plead for the one u loose but please do not treat ur self like the average man and woman on the street. Have GOD IN UR Lives ALL THE TIME NOT JUST FOR THE DAY U GET MARRIED IN CHURCH. But everything u do. And he will guide u.
If she was in prison and she doesn’t tell u later u find out that she was in jail for I don’t know forgery or killing some one. In confession she mentions this and finds absolution and above all seeks God forgiveness then ok. But that does not mean u will forgive right. So she hides it from u she can do that right. But that’s where God comes in. and true love come in.
Remember, 'Love never fails'.
Listen love it self is of all kinds
Here in this world man and woman get together sometimes in lust and they call that love…there is no such thing as love at first sight!
Then their r those who get married and r in love and very strong love…it still is according to the world why
Because this is not united with the love of God. For married in our church love is not of the love between each other but also with God so that froms the triangular relationship
SO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD JUST HAVE THE BOTTOM TWO
Not the third which is very important and I guarantee will
, 'Love that will never fail'.
So I hope this helps and my time was worth it God bless
I have made an attachment i hope people can view it
then the coulpe
noe if one was to draw a triangle with God at the head centre and the husband and wife at the bottom to ends. with arrows going toand from. thus shows the perfect relationship and also why love would not fail
Make sense? Too bad if its doesn’t aye :P kiddin…….ill clarify if confused
ahhh i seee.......the more one thinks about it the more one sees the benefits and rationale behind such a proposal but eventually it lays in the couples hands......i think most ppl too would be embarrased and dont want to be reminded of their sins or past........if you use the but i owe my wife or husband my all including my trust what then about your parents??? need to be consistent..........implementing is anotha story.........that needs tongue control.....
tongue control? i know for me im an open person..........and so i like sharing and discussing my experiences both positive and negative in the hope of guiding or assisting others and hearing others pplz mistakes makes one feel human......and in regards to the dots lol im a dotty person.... like over the place.......my ideas are always everywhere.........nah i dont know really.........lol
i dont get whats wrong with dots???????tongue control??? like shutting your mouth when you get home and not discussing what happened during your confession with your wife.....get it? or should i translate in french for you :P
Hence why i said tongue control
dude im not suggesting anything.............correct me if im wrong but YOU stated Abouna believes we shouldnt discuss our sins afta confession neither.b4 or after marriage......... right or wrong???
if so.......its not a realistic ask.......................but anything is possible .................