Do you think it is better to try to have honorable relationships with women or..

edited April 2006 in Faith Issues
to avoid women when you can to protect your self from lust?

I think avoiding is better if you feed yourself spiritually.. pray to our God and read the bible..

Some other christians think avoiding honorable relationships with women will lead to more private fantasies and it is better to try to have relationships with women..

Some monks or atleast one monk I think did not even want to look at women at all and maybe for years..

we are to think ourselves weak right?

What do you think?


  • i think you have just answered your own question :)
  • I want to know what others think..
  • As our Lord explicated, not all are called to be eunuchs for the kingdom of Heaven. For not all men can resist their sexual urges to the degree of absolute monasticism. Those who can, should....yet for those who can not, they are called to be witnesses of Christ through their relationship in the sacrament of matrimony. The answer, simply, lays claim to each person on the basis of his or her own individual spirituality. Please refer to Mathew 19.

    God bless.
  • i think it depends on a person if they can take the big responsibility if you think you are to weak to have the big responsibility then dont try to have one but if you want to have one but you are scared of that responsibility ask your abouna for spritiual help and try to do it if you fail its ok you still havr god he is still in your heart
  • "Lean not on your own understanding" Proverbs 3:5

    don't put yourself in a situation where even the slightest misunderstanding or temptation might lead you (and the other person) down a path that should be avoided at all costs. obviously nobody wakes up in the morning deciding that they want to destroy their life but one little thing leads to another leads to another leads to another...etc. Don't have pride and think you're not weak. All fall short in some way or another.

    "In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths." Proverbs 3:6
  • have u ever tried of thining of them as a sister...

    and that when u talk to them...u talk with the love of a sister....

    that when u call their name...for the love of her being ur sister....

    try that...and lust wouldnt be part of the equation...
  • u answered ur own question ;D
  • :/ ... both can work... most likely, avoiding completely, would be best cause God would take care of all the temptiton for u.. but than again if you don't avoid them you could still be good, its harder, but posable... with the fantsies thing.. em well i would think that if your mind is bussy on God, than how could u have room for fantsies....
  • I hope that my faith will always allow me to have honorable relationships with members of the opposite sex. Momentary fantasies are just that... fleeting thoughts.
  • do you think momentary fantasies are sins?
    because you cant have a fantasy without a desire (can you?) and ungodly desire itself is sin (isnt it?)
  • mike, it might be benefcial in answering your question to first find out how old you are; if you dont mind that is!
  • If you open a door that has a warning sign of, say, a sand storm or wind and dust outside then don’t expect to go back clean and tidy as you were before you opened that door. Logically, you’d expect to get, at least some, sand and dust on your body.

    Don’t waste your time and effort thinking and thinking of what is right and what is wrong in regards to “women” because just by doing so you’d be exposing yourself to more of those useless confusions and pointless arguments and at the end most probably we lose and by the day we get, really, weaker and weaker and the gab between us and God always gets bigger and bigger.

    I’d say, don’t rush after women and at the same time don’t hide your self and don’t panic if they talked to you, they aren’t too good or too bad they are just human beings like us, just be normal and if you have to talk to them talk to them in a simple easy way. Above all, it is only God that is able to fully help you, you just need to ask him for this and even if it takes a bit to time one day he will give you the pure mind and the simple eyes and always ask him to guide you to the “Truth” because the truth is usually different than the images and imaginations that we have in our brains towards some issues in our life. Pray for me a lot and God bless you and every one.
  • Thankyou for the advice..
    It seems right to me.. but who knows? (maybe you can ignore that sentence because I am often a confused person maybe?)

  • Didn’t really get what you mean by this but you don’t seem any of a confused person at all, you seem absolutely normal. One of many good points about you is that you are trying to seek other people’s opinions and learn from their experience which is a very mature and wise thing to do as long as you carefully with the help and grace of God choose and pick the right sources and resources to feed your brain and spirit. God bless you and all the brothers and sisters who always provide their helpful honest experience, I always learn from that. Pray for me.
  • i think you should have honorable relation ships instead of those i wanna do this and that relationships but id rather do a realtionship for the enjoyment and the fun of it but i wouldnt want babies lol I am just saying what I think
  • I think that if you put your main focus strongly on God, things will fall into place, and you will not look at women with lust, but with love.
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