Funny or embarrassing incidents at church

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  • When I was much younger...maybe 10, 11, 12 years old (something like that) my cousin, who is a couple years younger than me, was over my house. While he was there, Abouna came to visit. He came in and we had him sit down, and then everyone went to him to greet him and kiss his hand. My cousin, who I guess wasn't used to this at the time, is the last one. He walks down down the living room, shakes Abouna's hand as you would to any stranger, and then walked back and sat down. He had this look on his face when he realized he messed something up...it was just priceless.
  • This isn't much of a blooper, but it's hilarious to see some deacons wearing tonias that are a few sizes smaller and therefore reaches their knees and just touches their elbows...
  • i think the worst thing is when you are hysterical laughing & everyone just stares

    + Sister in Christ +
  • One time when I was a kid I went to a weekday liturgy and served as a deacon. There was a lot of Body left over during communion so the deacons partook several times. After the third time Abouna called me up again to take and I put my hand up and said "No Thank you" cause my mouth was full. Oh man, the look Abouna gave me - it still chills me to this day.
  • I know that "look".
  • Is this thread dead? :'( This was my favorite thread...dead
    I was waiting till the posts reach 100.
    Guess I should just give up...  ;) ;D
    Have fun,

    Cyril
  • NO!!!! this thread can't die!! we gotta keep it goin! i died from laughter at like every post!!!
    UUGGHH!! the one time i have the chance to post something hilarious that happened at church, i can't think of any!!! and believe me, we have PLENTY of little kids that can make that happen  :D
    heres a little push to keep things goin...i just thought of this:
    before we got electronic candles for the little kids to hold during the gospel, they would hold the normal, dangerous, able-to-burn-cloths-and-hair candles...
    so throughout the entire gospel reading you would hear various women going, "yalahwee!".."HASEB!!!".....*LOUD GASP*...."EL SHAMAA!!!"...."sha3r el wad!!" etc..
    abouna would always joke and be like, "whenever one of the kids is holding the candle, i know everyone will be paying attention" hahaha  :D ;D

    God bless :)
  • one time during the readings on Sunday while the church was pretty much full, a teenage deacon got up to the mangalia and began to read. Our priest, who is very strict but very loving, notices that the boy's voice is very faint and that he wasnt holding the microphone close enough to his mouth.  so he told one of the older deacons to signal to the boy to tell him to bring the mic closer to his mouth so that everyone in the church could hear the reading. the boy seemed to be really into the reading and didn't notice the older deacon trying to get his attention. so Abouna walks out of the altar with a serious look on his face and walks toward the mangalia where the boy is standing and takes the boy's elbow and lifts his arm up so that the mic is practically up the kid's nose. Now as Abouna begins to walk back to the altar, the boy lets out a little chuckle of laughter for about a second. Abouna turns around quickly and stares at the boy and walks toward the mangalia again, but this time abouna stands directly in front of the mangalia so that the boy who is reading is looking directly at abouna's face. The kid's face started turning red and it was getting obvious that he was trying to hold back his laughter sooo badly until he finally finished the reading and abouna walked back into the altar. Throughout all of this, the rest of the deacons are barely able to hold their laughter from whats happening. lol
  • before we got electronic candles for the little kids to hold during the gospel, they would hold the normal, dangerous, able-to-burn-cloths-and-hair candles...

    Electric candles...... Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

    Father Peter
  • haha  :D
    Hi Fr. Peter,
    I've read some of your posts and I know how you feel about the whole technology in churches thing  :). I agree with you, but at times, things like that (in my view at least) are necessary...especially when there's at least one cloth burnt every Sunday  ;)
    Besides, no one is actually (obviously) really paying attention to anything when there's a little kid holding a candle  ;D
  • Hmmm Electric Candles :S

    I think churches with little kids should use candle holders or even those long candle holders that are from the floor.. that way they just have to "stand" next to the candle rather than hold them... we do this in my church with the "arabic" church and with the kid's church (I think).. Not sure about the "english" church tho... but yeah we have our ways other than getting things burnt!

    Cheers
  • Lol!

    How did our fathers cope for 2000 years without electric candles!

    There seems to me to be good spiritual and theological reasons for using a real flame. It symbolises so many things, it consumes the candle as an offering to God etc etc. If a child is too small to properly hold a candle then I guess they should have something else to hold, or as described, some other method should be proposed.

    But if we are not careful then we end up down the health and safety, and efficiency route. And much of our tradition is endangered.

    Some would say we should not use incense because of the health risks, let alone allow a priest to wave a censer with red hot live coals around the congregation.

    Lol! I have seen people set other people's hair on fire, and they were adults! It was like Pentecost. But accidents are not the best reason to abandon our tradition.

    THERE WILL BE NO ELECTRIC CANDLES IN MY CHURCH!

    Father Peter
  • [quote author=Mikhail™ link=topic=7964.msg125466#msg125466 date=1293468966]
    Hmmm Electric Candles :S

    I think churches with little kids should use candle holders or even those long candle holders that are from the floor.. that way they just have to "stand" next to the candle rather than hold them...

    you can't fool little kids man...they like the electric ones cuz theres a button u gotta push to turn them on and off (they like buttons...i should know, i run the screen -- sorry fr. peter -- and they bombard me for the remote) but simply standing is no fun. besides they'd probably knock the stand down and light the whole church on fire.
    im sticking to the electric candles...they're a gift from heaven to spare our church from further damage  ;)
  • [quote author=Father Peter link=topic=7964.msg125472#msg125472 date=1293470950]
    Lol!

    How did our fathers cope for 2000 years without electric candles!

    There seems to me to be good spiritual and theological reasons for using a real flame. It symbolises so many things, it consumes the candle as an offering to God etc etc. If a child is too small to properly hold a candle then I guess they should have something else to hold, or as described, some other method should be proposed.

    But if we are not careful then we end up down the health and safety, and efficiency route. And much of our tradition is endangered.

    Some would say we should not use incense because of the health risks, let alone allow a priest to wave a censer with red hot live coals around the congregation.

    Lol! I have seen people set other people's hair on fire, and they were adults! It was like Pentecost. But accidents are not the best reason to abandon our tradition.

    THERE WILL BE NO ELECTRIC CANDLES IN MY CHURCH!

    Father Peter


    Believe me Fr. Peter, i agree with you fully but we only make the little kids hold the electric candles; adults hold the normal ones...
    the problem is that the kids fight over who holds what, like the gospel and the cross during the litany of the gospel...and when one of them doesn't get to hold a candle, they cry and we end up having 4 candle holders just to make them happy (this, by the way, is a worse risk to our church when there are 4 potential threats held by 4 careless kids)
    I love the symbolism in our church more than anyone and am completely against alterations to tradition but just to prevent injury and harm, the little children at our church are the electric candle holders  ;)
  • Lol! That is OK then. I don't mind taking account of children as long as the tradition isn't abandoned.

    I am not grumpy. Don't think I am. Just a conservative.

    Father Peter
  • haha! not at all  :D I know exactly how you feel about preserving tradition :)

    God bless!
  • I like the idea more of preserving tradition... I hate things against that... but I am not fully close minded; I think if in our church they use the electric candles in the kids church and so on then it is okay in the kids church because when they get older they will no longer be attending the kids Liturgy and they'll be trained and ready for the normal big church Liturgies ("arabic" or "english").

    Cheers
  • Not to get too off topic, but if the issue is little kids holding real candles, shouldn't we preserve the candles (as they are symbolic) and simply not let little kids hold them? At my church Abouna has asked that only grade six and above hold candles. I understand that we sometimes let them hold it to keep them busy, but isn't that sending the wrong message? You could literally write books about candles in our church, and to eliminate them so we can keep our kids happy is not worth it in my opinion.
  • [quote author=Michael Boutros link=topic=7964.msg125488#msg125488 date=1293476979]
    You could literally write books about candles in our church, and to eliminate them so we can keep our kids happy is not worth it in my opinion.


    I understand completely and I feel the same way; im pretty conservative when it comes to tradition (though not as much as fr. peter  :D) but only the very young children, as i said before, hold the electric candles. otherwise, everything is normal  ;) real, capable-of-burning candles are used ;D so, no worries Michael, nothing is being eliminated  ;)

    God bless
  • Kids should not be serving in the altar.  They are not allowed.  They are not of rank.
  • Here's a nice idea to along the lines of electric candles.  How about we use a Glade air freshener mist in the censer instead of charcoal and incense.  It would save on the risks of the burning charcoal.  The censer would never get dirty and not require any lazy deacon to have to clean it.

    I think it is a wonderful idea.  I'm going to suggest it to my priest on Sunday.

    Hmm:  I wonder what scent would I recommend?  Should I go with the spicy autumn scent or the apple crumb cobbler?
  • ha ha
    :D
    i really dislike electric candles too. you can't look at them without it hurting your eye a little. the good thing about real candles is they can definitely never be confused with toys that have buttons!
    if u can't control yr little kids then there are big problems that need to be addressed, if they don't realise holding the candle is a big honour that they are not worthy of then they are not spiritually ready to hold it, whatever their age.
    one of the very important things we need to teach in sunday school is the meaning of the parts of the service and why it's important to pay attention. the liturgy is not something for adults that the kids will somehow work out is important by the time they are older. it is something for everyone and we need to explain that.
  • Once  I lit a candle and gave it to my older brother. As he held it, it blew out so I took it from him to relight it. As I was holding it, the flame came back and the candle was lit so I gave it to my brother again. It then blew out when he held it once again and then you can guess what happened for the next ten minutes. All the deacons laughed hysterically.
  • [quote author=ilovesaintmark link=topic=7964.msg125530#msg125530 date=1293508182]
    Kids should not be serving in the altar.  They are not allowed.  They are not of rank.


    Yes but in all technicality only a "Full Deacon" can serve in the altar, and since most chruches do not have someone of that rank it becomes a free for all....

    but my church has deacons that can't read, and abouna won't say no to getting them ordained because their parents get mad....

    Attention parents! We are deacons we are NOT here to baby sit your kids during the liturgy.


    Sorry had to get that off my chest.....
  • Hmm:  I wonder what scent would I recommend?  Should I go with the spicy autumn scent or the apple crumb cobbler?

    No offense, but your comment was not appropriate during this time of year. I would have gone with Xmas scents: either the Berry Spice Everything Nice or the Santa Baked Magic Reindeer Ho Ho Ho.
    "Created by Nature, Captured by Glade" (copyright sign)

    Kirolies, was your brother standing next to a high velocity cooling fan or a cute five year old rattling the triangle as slick as his father?

    One of these days, ilovesaintmark is going to tie me up to a chair of timer bombs with only 2:01 minutes to escape and surprisingly press the button after 1:05 minute, only to find that he didn't plug it in, then the Glade commercial will come on "Plug it in, Plug it in" (copyright sign), and by the time he figures out all the wires, I'll already be gone with the wind (copyright sign) and posting on tasbeha again. One of these days...

    Someones really going to kill me Lord, Kumbaya. Someones really going to kill me Lord, Kumbaya.. Oh Lord, Kumbaya!
  • Yes but in all technicality only a "Full Deacon" can serve in the altar, and since most chruches do not have someone of that rank it becomes a free for all....

    That is incorrect.

    Sub-Deacon and higher are servants for the altar.

    I do not think someone in diapers should be serving in the altar.
  • I'd go with the spicy autumn scent...really brings out the incense aroma :D
  • I'd like to help us get back on topic with this topic by reposting Kirolies' incident:
    [quote author=Kirolies link=topic=7964.msg125560#msg125560 date=1293534270]
    Once  I lit a candle and gave it to my older brother. As he held it, it blew out so I took it from him to relight it. As I was holding it, the flame came back and the candle was lit so I gave it to my brother again. It then blew out when he held it once again and then you can guess what happened for the next ten minutes. All the deacons laughed hysterically.

    Moving on...
  • I once knew a girl who, on Good Friday one year, would constantly go up to the same deacon and put the recorder next to his mouth whenever he sang solo. She did it about 5829 times in the 10 hour period.
    He was a visitor deacon, and we never saw him again.

    I knew another girl who shouted "wih sabany" (thinking she was on the "Youannis Tasbeha Show") by herself in church.

    Deacons aren't the only ones with embarrassing incidents.
  • [quote author=lvnvrfails13 link=topic=7964.msg125630#msg125630 date=1293585605]
    I'd like to help us get back on topic with this topic by reposting Kirolies' incident:
    [quote author=Kirolies link=topic=7964.msg125560#msg125560 date=1293534270]
    Once  I lit a candle and gave it to my older brother. As he held it, it blew out so I took it from him to relight it. As I was holding it, the flame came back and the candle was lit so I gave it to my brother again. It then blew out when he held it once again and then you can guess what happened for the next ten minutes. All the deacons laughed hysterically.

    Moving on...


    lol
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