I am a bad boy that needs mental help!..i always cuss and everything i do is bad..on the internet i cant stop looking at pornography and i curse people on the internet.it just makes me feel happy doing it. i would like to stop watching pornography because i learned in sunday school that it is not pure.i want to stop cussing people on the internet because it hurts people's feelings.I am in need of help and i am addicted to girls. plz help me
You are very brave for wanting to change yourself for the better. I wish more people can learn from you.
Now how to deal with your problem. There are some basics and then specifics.
First - I would pray to God to give me strength and forgive me.
Second - I would fast the nativity fast which is starting this week. Make a promise to God that you will NOT do these things during that period of time (it is only 40 days, you can do it ;)). And try very hard to keep your promises. Fasting is not just fasting from food - it is about fasting from the things that cause you to sin.
Third - Any time you find yourself tempted to look at porn, open your bible. Even if you don't read more than one line. More importantly, try to schedule a time in your day when you can read the bible for 10-15 minutes (doesn't matter what you read).
Now for the specifics. I worry that if you try to change everything all at once, you will fall and get discouraged. I would suggest that you start with one thing. Maybe the porn. Work on that. Work really hard. Then, you will see, it will be easier to tackle the others. And when you are ready, speak to your FOC. He can give you WAY better advise than most people.
Anyone else have ideas?
God bless you,
well, youll never stop anything at all except when you get the thought of you being a really bad guy out of your mind, as long as you think you are a bad person youll never overcome anything.
now that you are a good person and you know it... start to tackle the problem, how can you do it? well, first find the root of the problem, for saying bad things, why do you say bad thing, even though you know it hurts others... so if you really worry about other's feelings then youll stop, so now it is a choice, that you need overcome, it is not in your blood to swear, but it is in your mind, and your choice.
for porn, this is an addiction my friend. because you can see you are already interested in getting out what you see on girls, and I can tell you now, whatever you do dont date, because youll hurt a girl very badly... also to overcome that addiction, plainly find the roots, and crush them, if it is too late and you are just, too addicted, then go to your parents, go to your friend, or just go to anyone and tell them, and let them add parental control to your computer, if that doesnt work, get rid of the computer in general....
I know I didnt help you much, but if you want to email me, go ahead, and I would love to go in details, I am psychology major, and that is exactly the stuff I am learning about.
Its awsome that you have come this far. Addmitting that you have a problem is half the solution. While I agree with most of what is posted so far, I would like to say that your first step should be prayer as ML mentioned, but second is your father of confession. It is embaressing to say these things infront of him, but that embaressment will help you quiet. He as advice far better than anyone here can give you. Just keep in mind that you probably are not the only one that told him that TODAY. He is given guidance from the Holy Spirit in these matters. Dont expect to stop everything in one shot, but gradually, one step at a time. Also try to occupy your time, having free time is inviting for the devil to tempt us. Try to have your computer instead of in your room, in a family room where others have access to seeing it whileyour working on it, it tends to help you stop.
One Final thing, never dispair, Remember King David sinned, Moses sinned, St. Peter Sinned. We are no where near thier spiritual stature and the sinned, but we must repent and ask God for forgivness and strength.
I hope this helps
Pornography is very addicting since its a way of getting high on your own brain chemicals. Many use pornography as a way of escape to life's challenges. It becomes obessesive and feelings of shame are common traits of this sex addiction.
I do have good news for you Basemaziz. There are 12 step groups modeled after Alcoholics Anonymous that can help you and its FREE! You can give a voluntary donation but its not mandatory. There are several of these groups and they don't conflict with Orthodoxy since its about spirituality and not religion. There's a feeling of empowerment when you meet others like yourself struggling in this disease since you don't feel alone anymore. Plus the 12 Step spirituality can even enhance your Orthodox Christian living since it involves practical solutions to a complex problem. So combining good regular meetings with these groups as well as sessions with your Confession father and partaking of the Sacraments , you WILL experience the healing power of the Lord Jesus Christ in a way that perhaps many of us will not. We all heal in diferent ways.
Here are some groups you can check out online: Sexaholics Anonymous, Sexual Recovery Anonymous, Sex and Love Anonymous. Sexaholics Anonymous has been highly recommended for people who are very religous since their definition of "sexual sobriety" agrees with our Christian values.
One more thing: please reflect on 1 Corinthians 6:12-20. It gives us hope since we are reminded that the Holy Spirit dwells within us since we are His Temples. You are special BaseMaziz thus seek the help you need and have the assurance that Christ is with you, healing you through all these channels. My prayers and hand goes out to you in the Love of our Lord Jesus Christ!
o and u gotta PRAY PRAY PRAY u have to talk to God and ask him 4 guideness.. he'll help u..
GOOD LUCK and pray 4 me too
God help u.
well ... i used to cuss ppl too.... u know how i managed to stop???? well... I wrote the bad things that i usually do in a notebook... and i put amount of money next to each one of 'em (for example... next to curssing...10Cents..... steelin...one dolla..and so on ... so the worst the sin gets to...the more money dat i had to pay) ... and for every time i do one of these sins... i used to pay God wutave the amount of money i had next to it!!! and since i din't have enough money to pay for everything i wanted to do... i had to stop doin 'em :P
I hope i was usefull.... yala man... becarefull (wa khally balak men 7ayatak ;D)