I am in real need for help on this

edited March 2012 in Faith Issues
I normally do not ask for help for this personal issue, which is that I am always lacking motivation to excel in my studies. I do the bare minimum which is why I get average grades and I take longer to complete anything.

I feel like it is torture to study hard. When it is 10 pm at night I say what am I going to do with this few time and how will I sleep so I end up ignoring study and doing something else more fun.
I feel if I study hard I get no reward and why should I always be a slave? I want to be converting the world for God, and make this world a happy place to live in where I also get love and respect

The bible says he who excels in his work will not stand before unknown men

I can not describe what torture it is to study most of the day to just go to sleep and not be permitted to dream about anything but that I have more study to do tommorow and possibly more of the devil's wars and that when I work I also will have to think about work yet never being valued as a person as someone desired to be welcomed in their group with their activities

If I do two hours every night of study that will equal 12 hours of study in the week excluding sunday, which probably covers 2 subjects already. So if I get that kind of break also in uni it will all add up. I just do not want to be a slave

When I am studying I also get the urge to pray and read the bible

what is the reward for hard work?

I tell myself if I work hard God will see it and bless me for it by somehow bringing good things to pass, but what if He doesn't? what if He just wants me to go to church with most of my spare time and try to be the spiritual body guard or rather savior of all who go there even though I know all my efforts will probably not help bring any soul to God's kingdom, because people especially hate to be told what to do and Jesus is after people who have rock solid relationships with Him and wants disciples who will do His will even when noone is watching? and since I do not even have a balanced life myself to be able to help anyone?

I always think about how I am not good enough to most people I encounter for them to stop by and welcome me to grow through their activities

Sorry for bothering you with this post

Sorry to trouble you even more but I am getting the feeling that this post is from the devil because it causes people to pity me and think I am cool for not studying alot and still passing and other worse things which may be better not to be mentioned done by bad people

My main problem which I was going to forget to talk about and the reason for my post is why am I not happy to sacrifice myself for Christ or anyone else? why do I hate hard work? why does God want me to go through this suffering with no rest?

Because I find it hard to focus and feel like my life is being consumed when I am studying I run around my room and jump and punch myself like a little child


  • Sounds like u need a 'get-away' a mini sabbatical of sorts. Are there any Monasterys or Monk priests you can visit?
    I find it very healing mentally to just sit in a holy place and listen to the sound of holiness. Taking a small Bible or a prayer book and just sitting and communing with God in silence. Even when visiting a holy person, it is good to just sit in silence sometimes and wait on God.
    For me, I have found the greatest motivation from being around holy places and people in humility.
  • So praying long enough will make me learn self discipline perhaps you think
  • So praying long enough will make me learn self discipline perhaps you think
    I don't know the next time my church is going to the monastery I don't drive extremely long distances because I get lost
    I need others to confirm the infallibleness of this suggestion
  • it's good to go with someone. don't go alone if u have trouble with long distances. ask God to show u His time to visit a monastery. until then, u can learn a lot from going to church and listening to the Holy Bible and the sermons.
  • As a matter of fact, im always experiencing this problem, but there are a few things that help me.

    1) Anba youssef says: Studying is like praying, and you have to be loyal and get your work done. Therefore, i you wish to fulfil your dreams of converting the world, you must first be an image of who you preach; Christ. For example, Gen 39:2 says "For the Lord was with Joseph, and he was a successful man".

    2) If you dont like something, get it done and out of the way. By working efficently and doing this, things will be much easier and then you will have more time to do whatever you want.

    3) Be strict, dont waste time whining, just do the work.

  • Thanks for the help guys
  • [quote author=user157 link=topic=12986.msg152717#msg152717 date=1330738119]
    So praying long enough will make me learn self discipline perhaps you think

    Of course! Praying long prayers will definately teach u self discipline. Get in the habit now while u r young and if God spares life, u will have a glorious old age to look forward too!
    Have u ever heard the story of the man who God asked to push against a rock? The man pushed and pushed against the rock without budging it! The man felt like a failure and said so God. But God told him he hadn't failed, he had done just as God commanded and even though he had not moved the rock he had become firm, fit and strong from pushing against the rock. Prayer is like pushing against the rock user157; it will make u a better person in every way.
    God bless u in your endeavors
  • I apologise elsi for thinking your suggestion was irrelevant but I feel that is exactly what I need but I know I will probably not find someone to come with me I should go when I ann even more stressed than now
    I need God to remove the clutter in my head and give me strength I need him to remove all the agitation and stored up blasphemies in my head (not against jesus lol)
    But normally running away does not help unless I am going to God for help and not often
    Normally we have to face it head on and resist the devil so God will make him flee from us
    How we use our time and our successes over these wars will be remembered before the Most High and just as a Father loves to watch his children grow stronger so it is and God will reward the victorious perhaps with an eternal crown

    Also if I am not praying but just thinking my state sometimes becomes worse because I have new worries
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