What should I do?

edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
This little 5th grader thinks that dating is fine. I told him it is wrong he wont listen. He is like can i grab a girl and kiss her........And then he is like my friend said I should do it and go deeper in the relationship. I tell him your friend is wrong he is insisting its correct. So many kids his age are telling him its correct. I dont know what to do. Again he is a 5th grader. He is coptic orthodox     

Im tired of convincing him.But i want to help him out. I dont want him to become a lost sheep.
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Comments

  • how old are you?? that can change the whole situation.... if you like in grade 5 or 6 like him.... he won't listen to you becasue other people your age are telling him it is fine.... but if you are like 22 and you talk to him, he will listen, and the more he likes you (as in friends) the more he is going to be conviced.....    get his sunday school teacher to talk to him.... tell Abouna... if it get tooooo desperate, talk to his parents....
  • Talk to his parents Loaca

    uve tried your hardest, and he wont listen either tell his parents (which may make u seem like the bad guy for a bit) or tell abouna and he will tell you what to do.

    God Bless and i hope this helps
  • I dont think his parents care.Because he already dates.
    I told him to tell Abouna but he is like no

    Btw abouna is very busy I will try to tell him....And i try to catch Abouna to see if i can confess and its challenging.
  • ok... is he close to anybody (older people...like 20ish)  at Church?? get them to talk to him.....      tell his sunday school teacher...
  • alredyyyy dating???? Wow and they say we are a bad generation=) Well u can try talking to him nicely.  I mean i always try  to talk to kids if they do somethin wrong.  But i can  see were ur going when you need someone older.  Then i go to them=)

    plzz tell abouna its for his benefit!

    /
    mahraeel
    plzz p4m sister in Christ
  • you should do it EGYPT style....  where is the belt???    at least next time you talk to him and he refuses to listen, raise your voice...  and please, please, i beg you, pull up your sleeves, and get a rotten shoe to hit him with it... (for some reason, all the "fights" i saw never get that far..... they always get my hopes up, then they end up being frends again...(a very good thing ... but it needed a belt whip in there first))

    if it dosn't work this time..... EGYPT style works best....
  • Lol Copticpharaoh we don't want to push the kids away from Our Lord, if we beat him, what will he think about the God we are doing it for, and the church we are doing it in the name of.

    We want to bring them up in LOVE of GOD and the CHURCH so be kind...

    And how do you know that his parents know???
    They may not know
    alot of parents dont know what their kids do.

    God Bless and dont worry GOD will choose the right path for him

    And when you pray Loca, ask for the Prayers of St. Mary, Pope Kyrollos, and Amba Karas....It will all work out dont worry

    God Bless
  • ok... you proved a point... but what do you think the kids in Egypt did???  bel gazma  'aw bel shebsheb 'el 'adeem?  they grew up to be good Christians becuase they knew what was wrong and stayed away from it.....  cause lets face it....  kids now a day don't listen to their pearents, because their parents can't do anything to teach them.... if the kid refuses and stands up to his parents, what are they going to do , punish him?? that won't work if the kid stands up to parents....    sometimes you gotta do stuff EGYPT style to make it work...
  • but if she isnt the parent then she cant hit him or do it EGYPT style lol
  • true He/She isn't the parent,  they can anybody always use EGYPT style Ta'deeb

    Loca.... are you a boy or a girl?
  • That way of parenting in this country leads to disaster later on.

    Just keep trying to convince him. Get Abouna, his Sunday school teacher, and his parents involved, no matter if you think they will care or not...at least then, you can say you did your part.
  • [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90374#msg90374 date=1213228477]
    ok... is he close to anybody (older people...like 20ish)  at Church?? get them to talk to him.....      tell his sunday school teacher...


    Yeah I just noticed today about this problem. So I have to wait till Saturday or Sunday to meet his sunday School teacher or any other grownup

    [quote author=mahraeel link=topic=6737.msg90376#msg90376 date=1213228842]
    alredyyyy dating???? Wow and they say we are a bad generation=) Well u can try talking to him nicely.  I mean i always try  to talk to kids if they do somethin wrong.  But i can  see were ur going when you need someone older.  Then i go to them=)

    plzz tell abouna its for his benefit!

    /
    mahraeel
    plzz p4m sister in Christ


    If you had a younger brother you would know whats happening these days in this age. Im worried about their generation. Freaky stories

    [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90379#msg90379 date=1213229393]
    you should do it EGYPT style....  where is the belt???    at least next time you talk to him and he refuses to listen, raise your voice...  and please, please, i beg you, pull up your sleeves, and get a rotten shoe to hit him with it... (for some reason, all the "fights" i saw never get that far..... they always get my hopes up, then they end up being frends again...(a very good thing ... but it needed a belt whip in there first))

    if it dosn't work this time..... EGYPT style works best....


    Cant touch him not his parent as you can see only 14

    [quote author=Christrules link=topic=6737.msg90384#msg90384 date=1213232779]
    Lol Copticpharaoh we don't want to push the kids away from Our Lord, if we beat him, what will he think about the God we are doing it for, and the church we are doing it in the name of.

    We want to bring them up in LOVE of GOD and the CHURCH so be kind...

    And how do you know that his parents know???
    They may not know
    alot of parents dont know what their kids do.

    God Bless and dont worry GOD will choose the right path for him

    And when you pray Loca, ask for the Prayers of St. Mary, Pope Kyrollos, and Amba Karas....It will all work out dont worry

    God Bless


    I agree I will pray for him.

    [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90386#msg90386 date=1213233831]
    ok... you proved a point... but what do you think the kids in Egypt did???  bel gazma   'aw bel shebsheb 'el 'adeem?  they grew up to be good Christians becuase they knew what was wrong and stayed away from it.....  cause lets face it....   kids now a day don't listen to their pearents, because their parents can't do anything to teach them.... if the kid refuses and stands up to his parents, what are they going to do , punish him?? that won't work if the kid stands up to parents....    sometimes you gotta do stuff EGYPT style to make it work...


    . I dont think his parents know. actually he does more than this.Im not going to name them

    [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90395#msg90395 date=1213238156]
    true He/She isn't the parent,  they can anybody always use EGYPT style Ta'deeb

    Loca.... are you a boy or a girl?

             
    Female



    Thanks for the advice so far
  • ok... first of all, he won't listen to you because you aren't "old enough" and secondly..... i am very sad to say this but here it goes: you are a girl..... no boy in grade 5 will listen to a 14 year old girl about that stuff....  (sorry i had to be the one to tell you).....  and thirdly, you aren't related to him, are you?
  • The best thing to do is to MAKE SURE HIS PARENTS KNOW. They can discipline him from there as they deem fit.
  • [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90403#msg90403 date=1213241531]
    ok... first of all, he won't listen to you because you aren't "old enough" and secondly..... i am very sad to say this but here it goes: you are a girl..... no boy in grade 5 will listen to a 14 year old girl about that stuff....   (sorry i had to be the one to tell you).....  and thirdly, you aren't related to him, are you?


    Yeah I know........ But he asked me for Girl Advice....He was like would a girl get mad if i grab her and kiss her? :o

    [quote author=Severus link=topic=6737.msg90404#msg90404 date=1213241544]
    The best thing to do is to MAKE SURE HIS PARENTS KNOW. They can discipline him from there as they deem fit.


    Ill try it will be challenging but its worth it . Cuz his parents might get mad at me. He might lie to them
  • Yeah he calls my brother 24/7 so he sits there talking and talking and talking.......He wants to talk to me to ask random questions like that its annoying me .......a little 5th grader talking to me on the phone.......
  • ask random questions?? is he like close to you, like are you guys freinds?? or what??    and you have to tell his parents and sunday school teacher......   
  • I will tell his parents and sunday school teachers

    How am I going to be a close friend to him??
    He calls my bro 24/7 Its annoying. He sits there saying random things. IM DEAD SERIOUS      THe phone is on speaker since he never finishes talking.....He asked me for advice..........He usually asks me about advice .........of what happens in school  I cant reject his problem without knowing it
  • well... you gotta read up and know the answer to all his random questions.....    because you don't want to be the one that gives him a wrong answer one day that he would take seriously and ruin his life....  by the way... ehat is wrong with being freinds with grade 5s? in my Church i am freinds with a couple of grade 5's... probably because we are all boys toghether, and my bro is in grade 5 and we have a small Church where everybody knows everybody....
  • Coptic pharaoh, just out of curiosity: how old are you?
  • [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90423#msg90423 date=1213243341]
    well... you gotta read up and know the answer to all his random questions.....     because you don't want to be the one that gives him a wrong answer one day that he would take seriously and ruin his life....   by the way... ehat is wrong with being freinds with grade 5s? in my Church i am freinds with a couple of grade 5's... probably because we are all boys toghether, and my bro is in grade 5 and we have a small Church where everybody knows everybody....


    I answer his questions in a christain manner.......If I dont know it I tell him to ask his sunday school teacher.He says I already did.....But the answers are similar.
  • [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90379#msg90379 date=1213229393]
    you should do it EGYPT style....  where is the belt???    at least next time you talk to him and he refuses to listen, raise your voice...  and please, please, i beg you, pull up your sleeves, and get a rotten shoe to hit him with it... (for some reason, all the "fights" i saw never get that far..... they always get my hopes up, then they end up being frends again...(a very good thing ... but it needed a belt whip in there first))

    if it dosn't work this time..... EGYPT style works best....


    Coptic Pharaoh, I don't know how you think parents are like in Egypt (shebsheb, gazma, 7ezaam, LOL) , but it's definitly not always like that. I was raised in Egypt and my folks never used a belt, and although I must admit there are some people who do such things, we definitly shouldn't be encouraging it

    Many kids, especially teens, will react very badly to physical punishment. It shows a parent's weakness, since he has to result to physical punishment for lack of wisdom of correcting his child otherwise. Many kids, when beaten, become very furious and end up behaving even worse than they did before, they end up rebelling against their parent's will.

    Anyway Loca, to be honest, I also think that you probably won't have much effect on him because you're younger than him, and people won't usually give much importance to advice given to them by younger people, which is a shame, since a good person knows that he can always and from everyone.
    I suggest you ask someone older than you who has authority and knows how to deal with a situation like this as others already have said sunday school teachers or abouna.

    I'm very happy to see your concern for him though, it shows a truly christian soul, but the best and most useful thing you can do for him is to PRAY for him.

    God Bless
    Please pray for me

    Anyways
  • The Christ arose Himself!

    Don't answer him with "Christian answers" answer him with life answers... if a person is far from the church the last thing they want to hear is "what would Jesus do?!" they'd rather hear something along the lines of dating is not okay at this age because... remember how Christ approached the sinners, he had them wanting to hear... we could clearly see that in the story of the Samaritan woman, she came wanting water... and left preaching the name of Christ.... again Christ didn't start his conversation with "ya believe in Christ... for I am he..."  he started the conversation by "give me water... " giving her importance.... as if He wanted help... and then the conversation escalated from there, so hear him out... see why would he date... and then answer his reasons with why not... according to life... society, etc... and then according to the church... and if he does not listen... guess what?! you cannot force him... you only give advice... thats the job of priests and spiritual guides to only give advice... you cannot stop him! you say your reasoning... if he listens then praise God... if doesn't... then you did your part... so praise God for that! and don't forget to pray... and put it on the alter! believe me God will respond, with the right action... for God loves and cares for His children more than you'll ever love or care for anyone!!!

    Indeed He arose Himself!
  • When you say put it on the altar do you mean actually writing it on a piece of paper and having someone put it on the altar or is it just an experssion to say pray about it

    God Bless
  • Thanks for the advice [quote author=SuperMAN(BAM) link=topic=6737.msg90476#msg90476 date=1213285959]
    The Christ arose Himself!

    Don't answer him with "Christian answers" answer him with life answers... if a person is far from the church the last thing they want to hear is "what would Jesus do?!" they'd rather hear something along the lines of dating is not okay at this age because... remember how Christ approached the sinners, he had them wanting to hear... we could clearly see that in the story of the Samaritan woman, she came wanting water... and left preaching the name of Christ.... again Christ didn't start his conversation with "ya believe in Christ... for I am he..."  he started the conversation by "give me water... " giving her importance.... as if He wanted help... and then the conversation escalated from there, so hear him out... see why would he date... and then answer his reasons with why not... according to life... society, etc... and then according to the church... and if he does not listen... guess what?! you cannot force him... you only give advice... thats the job of priests and spiritual guides to only give advice... you cannot stop him! you say your reasoning... if he listens then praise God... if doesn't... then you did your part... so praise God for that! and don't forget to pray... and put it on the alter! believe me God will respond, with the right action... for God loves and cares for His children more than you'll ever love or care for anyone!!!

    Indeed He arose Himself!


    I like this idea I will try it. But its still Thursday I have to wait till Saturday or Sunday to tell someone older than me cuz i dont see them during the weekdays. I stay home all day.
  • [quote author=godislove260 link=topic=6737.msg90474#msg90474 date=1213284916]
    [quote author=coptic pharaoh link=topic=6737.msg90379#msg90379 date=1213229393]
    you should do it EGYPT style....  where is the belt???    at least next time you talk to him and he refuses to listen, raise your voice...  and please, please, i beg you, pull up your sleeves, and get a rotten shoe to hit him with it... (for some reason, all the "fights" i saw never get that far..... they always get my hopes up, then they end up being frends again...(a very good thing ... but it needed a belt whip in there first))

    if it dosn't work this time..... EGYPT style works best....


    Coptic Pharaoh, I don't know how you think parents are like in Egypt (shebsheb, gazma, 7ezaam, LOL) , but it's definitly not always like that. I was raised in Egypt and my folks never used a belt, and although I must admit there are some people who do such things, we definitly shouldn't be encouraging it


    Don't worry, i was just joking, i was raised up in Egypt (the first 11 years of 15) and my parents never used a belt or shebsheb or any of that stuff...  but in Egypt you feel like parents have authority, here you don't
  • I agree to some extent, cuz I feel my parents are stricter here since we're in a western country and i'm a girl and so forth, yet we (or at least I) live in a society where respect for our parents as we learned about it in Egypt is not present, which is a pity... and this does influence their authority on us...

    I just had to make sure you were joking LOL, but I had figured it probably was just a joke..

    God Bless
    Please pray for me, a sinner
  • [quote author=godislove260 link=topic=6737.msg90584#msg90584 date=1213308497]
    I agree to some extent, cuz I feel my parents are stricter here since we're in a western country and i'm a girl and so forth, yet we (or at least I) live in a society where respect for our parents as we learned about it in Egypt is not present, which is a pity... and this does influence their authority on us...

    I just had to make sure you were joking LOL, but I had figured it probably was just a joke..

    God Bless
    Please pray for me, a sinner


    It is the end of the school year, so for some reason i am in a great mood (i wonder why?) and all my latest posts were jokes or sarcasm
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