My fiance has changed

edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
May the grace of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ be with us.

Dear  brothers and sisters in Christ,i am from one of the sister churches but i like your forum and i'm hear today to share my problem with u.

I knew this guy two years ago.We decided to get married after i finish university(i.e.after 4 years ).we were fine till last week.i mean obviously there used to be some minor arguiments which are easy to resolve by discussion.

However this time he is not talking to me properly.even when i ask him wat his problem is he just tells me to leave him alone.he is a very good preacher in my church.I can see that he is happy when he is there.
Since we start our fast he has changed! i dono wat to do. next monday is the start of our holy week and in this condition i don't even know how to fast.i can't pretend.i'm not good at it.
wat should i do? it is bothering me.i am even thinking to leave him for good.i have never been with anyone before.My relationship with God was very good before i met him.i haven't commited any sin with him thank God but my life is messed up! i couldn't give my heart fully to God.

please pray for me.it's affecting my spritual life and my education.
thank u.

Comments

  • my dear sister may the peace of God lead u.

    Please remember foremost
    Love the God ur LORD with all ur heart mind and soul.
    this comes first before anything, listen take a step back...see how God is leading this. This sought of happening it self in holy week is great...here for clearly u can seek God’s guidance in helping u solve this matter.
    Firstly collect ur self together stop being in a mass. doesn’t mean u destroy everything if one part of ur life is struggling. it is difficult yes indeed but  u must live right not die because of this crisis. pray to God about the matter and tell and let him be in control. of course u love ur fiancé so pour ur heart to the lord (NOT TO HIM)and what ever happens u will have to live with that.

    things to do with ur fiancé
    1 leave him ALONE
    give him his space....it is obvious something is bugging him don’t know fine but give him time and space to come out to u about it. Many time i have seen that because of the strong emotional love engaged/ 'couples' crowd each other so that one cannot breathe because the other person in love is trying to figure out all problems and solve it. Because they don’t want to loose that person.
    u will get ur chance to talk explain. but give him his space.
    it can be also that there have been all these series of compounding issues that has made ur fiancé’s glass to spill over .i.e. his thresh hold. So u must give him his space and collect ur self and let God work in him.
    2 he might have another entire different issue be it sinful or not being it his fall he is in contrition in fasting(repentance)
    3 he wants to tell u something but he cant find the strength to do so, so he is frustrated and he is seeking peace and answer and a way in fasting in this situation leave him alone again don’t be in his face! i see it happening allot
    4 in such a season couple and married people are meant to be apart to fast and seek GOD  yes they can fast together as well but for periods of time the must retreat from each other and seek God
    this holy week is the perfect time for that. Seek God he will deal with it. And perhaps u will learn one important lesson put God forward in ur life for the great sacrifice he made and perhaps such a lesson will set pavement into ur life of marriage to come.


  • Thank you so much karas7.it's a very good advice.
    ya i'll give him his space and see what God does next.

    anything else guys?

    Thanx again
  • [coptic]+ Iryny nem `hmot>[/coptic]

    The Passion week is the perfect time to figure out what the both of you should do.  Spend this week in silence, prayer and contemplation.  Reconnect with God, who is the source of Love, because He is Love.  Try to avoid contact with him for the time being and really focus all your time, and mind on God.  Ask Him to guide your decisions and I'm certain that by the end of this Passion week, a clear answer will present itself to you.  I can somewhat relate as my fiancée and I have decided to refrain from communication on msn (as she is in egypt and I'm here in canada) for the duration of the Holy Week.  In this way, we can recconect with the Source of Love and rekindle our love for each other.

    Please pray for me.
  • habesha, selam endemin alesh.

    tsom endet nebere? I hope you figured  out a solution for your problem.

    Egziabher ke'anchi gar yehun.
  • translate?
  • Selam hailemichael enkuan adereseh,tsom was good egziabher yimesgen.how was yours?

    wel my problem hasn't beem solved yet.
    please pray for me.

    ameteslase
  • [quote author=habesha link=topic=5155.msg69668#msg69668 date=1176397771]
    Selam hailemichael enkuan adereseh,tsom was good egziabher yimesgen.how was yours?

    wel my problem hasn't beem solved yet.
    please pray for me.

    ameteslase


    unfortunately, I did not tsom because I live in college dorm and they don't have that much of choice,  but still it isn't an excuse. 

    I will sure pray for you.
  • hi ,
    are you Ethiopian Orthodox??

    We have a lot of Sudanese and Ethiopian Orthodox Christians in our Church.. they're so cool.
    We have even a few rastafarians. Which denomination are u from?
  • [quote author=vassilios link=topic=5155.msg69687#msg69687 date=1176454479]
    hi ,
    are you Ethiopian Orthodox??

    We have a lot of Sudanese and Ethiopian Orthodox Christians in our Church.. they're so cool.
    We have even a few rastafarians. Which denomination are u from?

    Hello Vassilios,
    Yes i am Ethiopian Orthodox.
    Pray for me.



  • unfortunately, I did not tsom because I live in college dorm and they don't have that much of choice,  but still it isn't an excuse. 

    I will sure pray for you.


    Selam Hailemikael,i live on campus too!But i can cook myself.so i have no excuse not to fast.
    pray for me.
  • [coptic]+ Pi`<rictoc aftonf>[/coptic]

    habesha,

    Forgive me for prying, but how are you and your fiancé getting along now?  I pray you were able to resolve whatever issues you were having.
  •   :o
              Maybe leaving him would be for the best,  cos usually when a guy changes it means hes no longer interested, or showing his true identity.
                          P.s hope it all works out
  • +++
    hellow habesha, i am from Ethiopia too.
    the advice of Karas and others, i hope they help u.
    i have also faced such problem before and i was so challenged to make things under my controll. and i was taking advice from brothers and sisters, that had helped me a lot.
    especially my confession father, He advised me alot.
    generally it was very very hard for me to handle it. but now with the help of the Almighty God it is almost solved.
    what i can say is that, always pray particularly abt this issue, dont give up to pray, eventhou it seems good and try to talk with nearby friends, who r spritual and can really help

    let the Almighty help u.
    Tifsehit
    chaw
  • I think u should ask some of his close friends wut is wrong with him
    . Or ask his parents. And if he doesn't want to listen to u, he doesn't deserve u. And if it's getting in the way of ur spiritual life then u should get away from that position. Hope i helped!
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