Marriage and Divorce

Hi everyone.

Today i had a studies of religion class in which my teacher asked me about the views and ethics in the coptic orthodox church concerning marriage and divorce. She especially asked me if a woman gets excommunicated if they marry a muslim?

Any help on this issue would be appreciated.

P.S. She is asking about the modern coptic orthodox church, not the past (since in the past, women were not excommunicated if they married a muslim).

I apoligise if there has already been a post on this.
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Comments

  • Yes they do get excoummincated or considered as dead to the church because they left their faith for a person.
  • Thanks Marianne. Any more replies?
  • Well i dont think theyre excommunicated if they marry a muslim, maybeif they convert to Islam then maybe yes, but i dont think thats the case
  • They do get excommunicated if it's known to the priest...I know that for a fact...I had a neighbor who did that...plus if you look at it from another prespective, why would someone want to still go to church if they have decided to unite with someone of another religion. Marriage is a unity between God, man and woman...not between man and woman.
  • [quote author=Marianne87 link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56677 date=1150984181]
    Yes they do get excoummincated or considered as dead to the church because they left their faith for a person.


    is it that easy to say??!!!.

    [quote author=Marianne87 link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56688 date=1150994519]
    They do get excommunicated if it's known to the priest...I know that for a fact...I had a neighbor who did that...plus if you look at it from another prespective, why would someone want to still go to church if they have decided to unite with someone of another religion.



    also would you think abouna will have fun knowing that yes lets excoummincate that girl. also try to answer these posts on what is written down in our church to do not to what you see happend because you know that there is exception for excoummincation to.

    Marriage is a unity between God, man and woman...not between man and woman.

    don't forget that they would always use the term love


    [quote author=Coptic Dragon link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56667 date=1150971409]
    Today i had a studies of religion class in which my teacher asked me about the views and ethics in the coptic orthodox church concerning marriage and divorce. She especially asked me if a woman gets excommunicated if they marry a muslim?


    "Excommunicated" is a really big word and it's meaning is not biger because your telling that person that you believe in God and you did this big sin and you kept doing and you never repented that God will send you straight ti Hades. can you really go and tell a person that.
    First, in our COC, you need about 3 bishops to excommunicate any christian. and don't forget that our God is a merciful One that will never let go of one sheep except they are nor there any more. so our church always have it's doors open for every one who want to be christian or especially whose who were/are but sinned and wish to repent.
    we say in tasbeha:
    [glow=red,1,000]"For You do not desire, the death of a sinner, but rather that he returns, and that his soul may live."[/glow]

    [quote author=Coptic Dragon link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56667 date=1150971409]
    P.S. She is asking about the modern coptic orthodox church, not the past (since in the past, women were not excommunicated if they married a muslim).

    When did our COC change. Our church is Orthodox that is unchangable. our rites and dogmas are the same and will never change. and like i said, tha word excommunicated is BIG especially in the past because unbelievers would do anything to get to the true God. and of course their faith that is somtimes more than us christans leads them in the right way.

    To sum what i said up,
    If any christian (men & women) have married anyone from another religion (not only islam) they will always have the chanse to repent and get back on the right way. This was the way all across the years.
  • Look if you don't have official sentence from the church itself then don't argue over something you don't know....go ask an abouna and then come talk.
    Since that's something I saw with my own eyes then I said it...I don't say things I am not sure of...got me?
  • [quote author=Marianne87 link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56694 date=1151016335]
    Look if you don't have official sentence from the church itself then don't argue over something you don't know....go ask an abouna and then come talk.
    Since that's something I saw with my own eyes then I said it...I don't say things I am not sure of...got me?


    give me sometime i'll get you what proves what i say.
  • take your time.
  • If anyone man or women gets married to someone that is not Coptic Orthadox Christian the they are not Coptic Orthadox Christian.
  • If anyone man or women gets married to someone that is not Coptic Orthadox Christian the they are not Coptic Orthadox Christian.

    Not true at all. If either the wife or the husband are Coptic Christians, the spouse must be put into the baptism. Baptism declares faith to the Trinity and Coptic Orthodox faith. Divorce does not break baptism, but does break a sacrament. They still are Copts but they broke Coptic sacraments.
  • The marriage would not be recognized as valid would it?
  • Hello

    No i dont believe the marriage would be valid or recognised in the eyes of the church.

    Marriage is one of the seven sacraments of the Church.

    Kristina123
  • Ok hold on people here. A Coptic Orthodox Christian cannot marry someone outside the Orthodox faith. It simply is not allowed. First, the nonOrthodox must be baptized, then they can marry. If not, than I suppose they are excommunicated, because as stated above, marriage is a relationship of love between God, man, and woman. If God is not present, it is not marriage.
  • Hello

    [quote author=Christ4Life link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56736 date=1151076802]
    Ok hold on people here. A Coptic Orthodox Christian cannot marry someone outside the Orthodox faith.

    well they can! but if they do the marriage is not recognised. that is the essence of the original post.

    Kristina123
  • Well thanks everyone for your help (Keep posting). But if anyone can get me real written facts or any sites with information, please tell me. They may come in use.

  • Hey Coptic Dragon.

    To begin with the church will not excommunicate someone that marries a muslim. Excommunication in the church was and is always associated with the divinity of Jesus Christ and the heretical teachings associated with it.

    The church allows divorce under two conditions

    1. Adultry by either partner

    2. Or if there is a conversion of religion by either partner

    However in neither of these cases will the church excommunicate the individuals involved because our church is a church of repentance and as Christ said all sins are forgiven except those against the Holy Spirit - only then is excommunication plausible --> after all methods of convincing an individual that he/she is wrong have been exhausted ofcourse!!!.

    Hope that helps!!!
  • This is a very interesting discussion. I think like mina said "excommunicated" is a big word. But a person who married in another religion is not allowed to take Holy Communion. That does not means they are not allowed to attend Liturgy. But in order to be allowed to take Holy Communion. They have to do either one of two things. That is.

    1) Divorce none believer
    or
    2) Baptize spouse and get married in COC
  • [quote author=Bespetna link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=0#msg56703 date=1151025506]
    If anyone man or women gets married to someone that is not Coptic Orthadox Christian the they are not Coptic Orthadox Christian.


    This is not true. Copts can marry Armenian Orthodox, Syrian Orthodox, Ethiopian Orthodox, Indian Orthodox or Eritrean Orthodox Christians. In some instances economy has been exercised by the Church with respect to marriage of Greeks. There is currently an active pastoral agreement between the Coptic and Greek Patriarchates of Alexandria with respect to inter-communion marriage.
  • This is a very interesting discussion. I think like mina said "excommunicated" is a big word. But a person who married in another religion is not allowed to take Holy Communion.

    That is what ex-communication is. If one is told that they cannot partake of Communion, then they are essentially ex-communicated.
  • Does the COC believe in annulment?
  • not really, annulment is the invalidation of a marriage, by declaration stating that the marriage was never valid.

    This occurs in the catholic church and takes a few years to be carried out. It allows one to be re-married because the annulment declares that they were never married before.

    All I wanted to know was, if the COC recognises it at all? (like in serious and rare cases, were one is physically abused by their partner and want a divorce, can they get re-married?)
  • [quote author=mazza link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=15#msg57171 date=1151921944]
    Does the COC believe in annulment?


    annulment in the COC happends only on the 1st year of marriage (according to H.H.). and with annulment, the church daclare that the marriage was never applyed from the beginning.

    [quote author=Coptic Dragon link=board=4;threadid=4047;start=15#msg56791 date=1151231917]
    Well thanks everyone for your help (Keep posting). But if anyone can get me real written facts or any sites with information, please tell me. They may come in use.


    can i please ask how are these info will come in use for you??!! if you really want to know the truth about you're religion, i think you can go and search for yourself (meaning get reall facts from all kind of clergy, books, and trusted sources), and than you can post them here for us to learn. because really, what are being written here are mostly opinions. and some are facts but how would you know which is which. please don't depend on "i saw that happend..." or " i think...". if you really wanna benifit, get the truth and than may be everyone will say what he thinks, but atleast we have the truth and the church solid doctrine about the issue to talk about.

    forgive me, but i know for a fact our church wasn't built on opinions and also i know that they will never be a help to us in any way especially when we really need reall facts.

  • if you really want to know the truth about you're religion, i think you can go and search for yourself (meaning get reall facts from all kind of clergy, books, and trusted sources), and than you can post them here for us to learn. because really, what are being written here are mostly opinions. and some are facts but how would you know which is which. please don't depend on "i saw that happend..." or " i think...". if you really wanna benifit, get the truth and than may be everyone will say what he thinks, but atleast we have the truth and the church solid doctrine about the issue to talk about.

    Im sorry minagar, but this is the reason why i started this forum. This is why i asked for help, i dont know where else to get official sources on orthodoxy unless its from my parish priests (who i could not contact in time to inform my teacher about the whole divorce issue). I also started this forum because i knew that there were well informed copts on the site who could help me out, and they did.

    The whole purpose of getting this information and keeping it for later is to inform people who are unaware about our religion and those who want to know about this information. Minagar, i totally agree that our church IS NOT based on opinion, its based on tradition. And thats why i asked in the first place, so i could get my facts right.
  • Salam
    Coptic Orthodox Church is the same as it was stablished by st Mark the Disciple as LORD JESUS IS THE SAME YESTERDAY, TODAY & TOMORROW,
    for 2 people to get married inOur Great Coptic Orthodox Church, they mus be members of BODY OF LORD JESUS ( members of Coptic Orthodox Church ) inorder for Sacrament to be Fulfilled,
    in other religions marriage is not a Sacrament, it is contract, contract can be done between any 2 persons, but there is no GOS BLESSING,
    please stich with Coptic Values,
    MAY OUR LORD KEEP YOU IN ORTHODOXT FAITH TILL THE END,
    THANKS
  • Some typing mistakes in my reply, I apologize :
    stablished ===> established
    inOur ===> in Our
    mus ===> must
    inorder ===> in order
    it is contract ===> it is a contract
    GOS BLESSING ===> GOD BLESSING
    stich ===> stick
    ORTHODOXT ===> ORTHODOXY
    sorry for inconvenience,
    thanks
  • My dear friends
    Another twist in the tale------- What happens in this case? A Muslim married couple - The woman wishes to convert to C.O. - The Church will not accept her as long as she is married to her muslim husband. So in a way the Church demands a break up of a family unit and divorce. Comments on that - plz. and would that then guarantee admission to the Church or would a divorcee also be frowned upon?

    God Bless

    Geraldine
  • Hi Geraldine,

    It's nice to see you back on the forum. Have you spoken to any clergy about this situation. I have been told by my parish priest that he has baptised a woman who is married to a Muslim man. She continues to live with him and practices Christianity in private.
  • Well I learned that church doesn't encourage the breaking of families even in that situation where each couple has a certain belief...the church however considers the marriage invalid.
    Here is a couple of verses that explain what I have said a bit more....
    "If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
    But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?"1 Corinthians 7: 12-16


    The church will accept anyone who wants to convert there is no condition whatsoever...as explained in the verse above.

    Hope that answered your question.
  • Thanks for the words of encouragment - but let me tell U this lady u referred to is a very lucky lady as she found a sympathetic Father.

    I was told in No uncertain terms " to try the Roman Catholic Church" by the Priest I was speaking to :(

    I must say I felt very " empty " and saddened by this - But haven't given up ---- OOOh no


    Geraldine
  • really good replies... these were very valuable. thank you iqbal, you comments are always useful. i learned about many things in this thread.

    salam
    Fibo
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