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Church youth going down a hill
Hello
I have more of a concern than anything
I am in a Coptic Orthodox Church and my concern is that the church and the parents gave the teenagers in my church a circle of allowed things to do but then they start shrinking (making smaller smaller) that circle to the point that the kids just got fed up and started to do stuff behind their parents back
If i tell the kids go talk to your parents they will tell me ooh you are one of them now and i will loose their trust and if i tell the parents they will punish their kids in which case i will loose the kids trust and the parents will just stay the same
what should i do??? i am very sad to see the church youth start going down a very steep hill
:-\
I have more of a concern than anything
I am in a Coptic Orthodox Church and my concern is that the church and the parents gave the teenagers in my church a circle of allowed things to do but then they start shrinking (making smaller smaller) that circle to the point that the kids just got fed up and started to do stuff behind their parents back
If i tell the kids go talk to your parents they will tell me ooh you are one of them now and i will loose their trust and if i tell the parents they will punish their kids in which case i will loose the kids trust and the parents will just stay the same
what should i do??? i am very sad to see the church youth start going down a very steep hill
:-\
Comments
one thing i've found, is a youth group who is taught to be brother and sister with one another as a solid group, who prays together (and that's KEY), who spends fellowship time together, who helps eachother, and who learns about Christ together always sets Him as their goal, and grows stronger and stronger in Him, together.
keep praying and God will make it happen!
they are not doing anything that will drive them away from God because they are good girls that just want some space but their parents won't give it to them
and if i go talk to like 40-60 year old parents and people in charge of sunday school they will be like you don't know what you are talking about?
Do you understand my point of view and where i am coming from?? ::)
but, i think what you can do is perhaps start some activities within the church for those girls.. get them more interested in spending leisure time at church doing fun stuff with their youth group and the older girls etc.. maybe have a play, or set up a choir, or even just a games night. it's possible that then their parents will get used to the idea of them being out, and it'll help them loosen up a bit..?
and if a 19 yr old boy tries to do something for 15-17 year old girls ya you know how egyptian parents think i am very good friend with all their parents but still. That is why i came here because i thought of all those very good ideas of yours but didn't see they will get me anywhere and i was wondering if i can get some more ideas ???
another alternative to a priest , would be an older member of your parish that you can turn to for spiritual guidance - also pray - pray - and pray some more.
Sava
i decided as helani adviced we as a youth group in church will start hanging out more often under the supervision of like the their sunday school teacher so at least those girls can come talk to us if they need advice or if they just need a vent to vent their feelings or emotions out and i guess that is all i can do right now beside praying of course
do is your best and Let God handle the rest.
Your brother in Christ - Sava
I really appericate your feedback and if you anything more plz let me know
Its reverse psychology. this is my theory- if there’s a box in the corner of a room chances are heaps of people will see it and only few will open it to see what’s inside BUT if the same box has DO NOT OPEN written on it the 85% of the people who pass it will approach the box in order to see what’s hiding inside.
when parents, priests and servants make a big deal about issues like dating kids want to know why its forbidden, they want to try it out for themselves (after all forbidden fruit is always more luscious). That’s where the problem starts, once you experience affection from an individual from the opposite sex you feel ‘special and happy’ and you just want more attention and love.
What you have to understand is that these kids don’t always mean to hurt God or themselves. They just want to be loved and understood. And may I add, sympathy is always nicer when it comes from the opposite sex. Youth who have boyfriends or girlfriends sometimes feel that they are SO different from their peers (who are either too spiritual and are from the church or are too wild and do not have Religion influencing their lives) and as a result feel they have no one to talk to- if they approach their friends from church they may look down at them where as if they approach their school friends they may mock and laugh at them)
You were right! These kids don’t want another set of parents they want someone who they can confined in. besides praying for them you can offer your help and your ears. If anyone wants to talk then let them know that you are willing and open. After they do talk, it’s not a lecture they want to hear, it’s more along the lines of how special they are to God and how much he loves them! Even that sometimes can scare a teenage girl away- but once you have won over trust that’s all you need.
In my church, as many others the girls feel that they can talk to particular servants. These servants are always open and never make the girls feel inferior or low. They just keep reminding them how much god loves them and how he will always forgive them no matter what they do. Once you establish a friendship with the girls, and you show them that you too are human and either a) like to talk about other things or b) make mistakes as well then they will feel much better and will talk to you often about their problems.
Parents are strict- that’s why teen’s rebel and the teens will continue to do it so long as parents try to keep a protective barrier around them. As a Sunday school teacher/servant all you can do is guide them, talk to them and defiantly pray as hard as possible for them. Hope any of this was useful
May god bless your work :)!
I really appreciate your feedback and help.
Please keep it coming everything even if you think is small helps me out. :)
God bless-
if you have any questions id be more dan happy 2 try n find the answers!
Peace of the Lord be with you
???
Defender!
so please let us know what you think of the concern and if you think that we going on the right track or not.
It's so nice!!
Well, ttyl!
Pray 4 me a lot!
Defender!
Defender!
"mom/ dad, im going to church!"
"ok honey, pray for me and be good"
"ok bye"
hope this made some sense. but that is the one place that most parents let their kids go to without any suspesion.
Defender!
Does that make sense? Like no kissing, holding hands, and so on.
I think that make perfect sense at least to me. so when you are talking about dating, of course any kind of dating inside the church is wrong, but meeting those people through the church than dating them outside the church is not wrong, i think!!
That was just my idea maybe you guys have a different point of view.
just let me know :)
Defender!
Interesting how we got from youth group issue to a dating issue that really doesn't have an age constrain on it!! ;)
Defender!