going back to church

edited October 2015 in Personal Issues
i am 20 years old life took me away from church for a while. it made me go  from going to church all the time  to going to church only once every month or so. idk how to go back to church often like i used to be. every time i go i feel out of place or i feel comfortable being around people or in church it self. 
please help on any advice on how to go back?


  • edited October 2015
    God be with you and watch over you. I am in no position to give advice on such a subject but rather I will try and give you words of encouragement and my opinions.

    First I believe that an individual must want to go to church for the right reason.
    I could go to church every week but am I really benefiting from it each time I go? Each time I go to church, am I trying to improve my relationship with God or am I just going through the motions and treating it as a routine or a habit? Easy said than done.  Many times people (including myself) will make church as part of our weekly schedules. God is not something that we fit in our schedule or routinely do. I saw a funny ad awhile ago that said "God wants full custody, not just weekend visits."   Set a goal for yourself. Like.. I want to go to church so I can confess and take communion. Or I want to go to church so I can pray and thank God for all He has done for me. 

    Another way might be to get into service. Now I know you said you haven't gone for awhile but perhaps service will help keep you in. Service will show you the community of the church and the love of the church, especially if you serve younger ones or the elderly. I think that your service will also help you not feel out of place as much and also perhaps make you feel more comfortable around people.  The church is like one big family and community so you'll also get to know others through your service. You don't have to teach a class or lead a bible study. You can serve in the simplest of ways. Asking about others, helping out in the church kitchen or bookstore, cleaning up you Father's house. Any of these will help you form a closer relationship with the church and ultimately a closer relationship with God. 

    Lastly never feel out of place when going to church. It your Dad's house. I know sometimes the Egyptian culture can be quite harsh, especially for those who do not come often but try not to let that effect you so much. God is welcoming and so should the people that pray in His house be.

    God be with you

    *Pray for me
  • Copticgirl, 

     I become Coptic Orthodox in 2010, and didn't go to Liturgy weekly until early 2013. I didn't like to go because I was American and didn't speak Arabic and still felt out of place. But, after going to Liturgy more and more, learning about the church, learning about the Saints, the fasts, and so on, I came to understand more about the core of our church and learned how even other Oriental and Eastern Orthodox churches have various ethnic aspects to them. 

     My advice is to learn about the church. And I mean the history or our church. Look to pray daily, read about the Saints, and even if it takes time for you to get into those habits, having God on your mind is a great start. Don't allow the physical aspects of the church, i.e. the laypersons, make you feel uncomfortable. Open your heart to God while at a Liturgy and you'll see a change in yourself. And now, near the end of 2015 I am a Deacon. God Willing, in another two years I may be even more involved.

    But, do not feel rushed to be active in the church because some people will make you feel that way. Go at your own pace and always understand that you must be patient. Good luck and God Bless. 

    Please Pray for me.
  • thank you so much @penanko  and ItalianCoptic 
    pray for me. so god could guide me back to churc.
  • Lemme tell you something.

    I'm a returning user - CopticStrength I used to be all about church and all about God.

    You're are a million times better. Why?

    For 8months, I havent taken communion. I have parents, and every sunday I go through the motions of going to church, but stay in my car during liturgy and only go inside during sunday school time so I can "serve" and so I dont get a phone call asking why Im not there.

    You have good intentions, but others like me? Not so much.
  • dear friends, please don't despair.
    start by going back to church.
    tell God 'ok, i don't have great intentions, but please help me to have better ones'.

    you both have lots of time to spend your future lives in the church, so don't delay, start a new life today.
    we all fall, but God helps us to get back up again.
    Christian life is about learning how to get back up after the fall - with practice you can repent more quickly each time and spend less time in despair.

    don't focus on not falling, this is for people who are already doing miracles and who spend every waking moment thanking God.
    for people like us who are not so far along in the spiritual life, our main aim should be to learn how to get up more quickly after each fall; we all fall down at times.
    may God inspire you and give you peace
  • I pray that you can be in the frame of mind to go to church for Christ only, not worrying about anyone else; parents or anyone. Then Jesus will teach you to love yourself second and others third. God been first of course.
    In our life we seek independence and sometimes just being away from others is enough. Try be be open for when Jesus calls you to be more committed as he never stops calling and the Holy Spirit will bring you back. You will discover in the world when you listen to some others that there is doubt in their minds but seek to be trusted. Trust God and you will receive true independence even when you are with others.

    God bless.
  • Forgot to mention that I have three young boys going through various stages of independence. It's bit Like the prodigal son going to find the world and finds himself poor for it. Then goes back to a father who always had love for him.
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