Feeling Lonely

edited August 2011 in Personal Issues
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Comments

  • well Yousie,
    I don't know what age you are, but having a boyfriend at the teenage age is not right for you spiritual life. If you are looking to get married then that is when you look for a man. I would suggest hanging out with your friends more often, try not to sit by yourself cuz then you will be all depressed. I also suggest that you pray about this feeling that you have to be with a man when you get it. It is really hard i know, i myself am a teenager and sometimes i get this feeling around girls, but i made a new rule for myself. Every time i get that feeling, then i will read a chapter from the Bible.


    I will pray for you
  • Hey Yousie

    I think the problem is free time

    So maybe you can create activities for yourself to fill your free time.
    You can pick a character from the bible and learn more about it. For example you can pick St. Paul and try to read about his missionary trips.
    You can also listen to sermons. Go to orthodoxsermons.o,rg
    You can also hang out with the little kids  in your church. For example, you can take them out to  a restaurant or something.

    Try to think of other projects that would fill your time and in the mean time get you closer to God.
    Try to see what you are good at and use it for God's glory. For instance, if you like to draw, draw. If you like to play music, play music......

    God bless you and I pray that God fills your heart with His love.
    Ebnyasoo3
  • [quote author=yousiegtennis link=topic=9192.msg114079#msg114079 date=1272938881]
    Hey everyone,
    I have a problem.  I had a boyfriend over the summer (he was the first and only).  We were only together for one month and then we broke up.  I told Abouna everything and I sought advice about this situation.  However, my problem is that I feel lonely.  I have many friends and they are great, I love all of them!  They and my family provide a lot of support!  Sometimes though, I feel as though it's not the same as being with a guy.  Does anyone have any suggestions about how I can overcome the feeling of loneliness?  Any answers will help.  Please and thank you.
    -Yousie


    Hi Yousie,

    How old are you ?
    Why did you break up for? Usually, the idea is to get to know someone and not break up, and then finally get married. Were either of you in a position to get married had you not broken up?

    Would you agree that there's no point in starting something that you cannot finish, as unless you are both ready, you'll end up breaking up with whomever you date.

    With respect to feeling lonely, I would recommend that you keep your mind busy with learning, hymns, reading, Church, serving others. Why don't you enjoy this period in your life where you can do things like travel with friends to parks, places etc?

    Its a good age.

    I try to focus your spiritual growth in this period. It won't come back. Anba Moussa said that youth (our youth!) should be joyful. There's a lot of benefit being a Christian and I feel that at a young age, you can truly experience, more than anyone, the Joy that Christ gives us by being attached to Him. I believe that you can benefit greatly, and enjoy a brilliant spiritual life as , at a young age, you have no worries that distract you from prayer. You have not lived long enough to have so problems that could upset your spiritual life.

    I would recommend that you go to Church at least twice a week and have Holy Communion, and listen to the tasbeha often.
  • [quote author=yousiegtennis link=topic=9192.msg114111#msg114111 date=1272997112]
    Zoxsasi,
    I'm 19 years old.  I do not wish to go into details about my failed relationship with this individual, however, I will relate one point to answer your question.  The reason we broke up was very stupid...he initiated it...it was because I didn't want to kiss/make out with him and in his own words: I was too innocent for him.  I took him and the relationship seriously and I sincerely wanted to get to know him better but he did not.  He wanted a physical relationship only and as much as I was tempted to kiss him, I did not, so he broke up with me.  This has caused me to feel many things and question a lot of my morals and values.  Sometimes I think there is something wrong with me.

    Thank you for your suggestions...I will keep those in mind.
    PLEASE pray for me A LOT


    I think I can say I speak on behalf of everyone here when I say: well done!

    Dear Yousie - you don't really need to date to get to know someone. Trust me. Even if you are 27. God will reveal to you everything anyway.

  • [quote author=Crazy4Christ1 link=topic=9192.msg114113#msg114113 date=1273003704]
    http://orthodoxsermons.org/sermons/coping-with-loneliness



    Crazy4christ, this sermon is amazing! I really recognise myself in this, thanks for sharing!

    GB
  • hey this is a reallyyy good sermon that applies for you =]
    http://orthodoxsermons.org/sermons/coping-with-loneliness
    God bless you =]
  • o woops! i didnt realize that someone already posted that lol
  • [quote author=yousiegtennis link=topic=9192.msg114111#msg114111 date=1272997112]
    Zoxsasi,
    I'm 19 years old.  I do not wish to go into details about my failed relationship with this individual, however, I will relate one point to answer your question.  The reason we broke up was very stupid...he initiated it...it was because I didn't want to kiss/make out with him and in his own words: I was too innocent for him.  I took him and the relationship seriously and I sincerely wanted to get to know him better but he did not.  He wanted a physical relationship only and as much as I was tempted to kiss him, I did not, so he broke up with me.  This has caused me to feel many things and question a lot of my morals and values.  Sometimes I think there is something wrong with me.

    Thank you for your suggestions...I will keep those in mind.
    PLEASE pray for me A LOT


    Well done indeed. You showed great character by doing this. May God bless your household and your marriage God willing.
  • Here's a few ideas on how to keep yourself entertained:

    How about travelling, or asking abouna to see when he plans a trip with the youth?

    Why not go and spend sometime in a monastery!? Or, take up a hobby like fishing, or learning a new language??

    Do you like photography?

    Do you live in a city that is beautiful, interesting, has some charm/character ? U could take up photography as a hobby in that case - it could inspire u.
    There's icon painting...

    Why not just learn a new language??
  • I am sorry that this is late but...
    [quote author=Zoxsasi link=topic=9192.msg114112#msg114112 date=1273000140]
    Dear Yousie - you don't really need to date to get to know someone. Trust me. Even if you are 27. God will reveal to you everything anyway.

    Zoxasi, can you please explain further how one can get to know someone (seeking a serious marriage relationship) without dating.
    thanks in advance.

    Please pray for me..
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