Relationships

edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
Im interested in this girl from my church and we're really good friends.  We've been friends since 8th grade. I really dont know what to do right now.  Because I dont want to ruin our friendship.  She's a really good girl she knows a lot of alhan, shes a servant, always comes to liturgies, and reads the bible a lot.  And I dont want to get Abouna involved unless I know shes the one.  Please I need comments.
Aydan Fal Nashkor Allah!!

Comments

  • lol... God looks at us planning for the future and He laughs... its the same as watching a little child saying how he will be a firefighter... its so cute, and funny...

    ya 7abibi... we all think we found the "right" girl... we all think we found the "perfect" girl for us... this is all meaningless talk... you never know how perfect she'll be, and how close to church she'll be in two years... or when she meets guys... or on and on... so in two or three years, if you still think she's "good" then talk to abouna... otherwise stay as friends, and regular friends not even too close of friends where you would know her personal life and she yours!

    estana shewya ya habibi... you're almost there, don't let the devil trick you!

    neshkor Allah... akhadna el baraka...
  • i have the same issue too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • ok, so i had the same problem. I thought my best friends brother was the "one" since i knew him for a good 7 years, plus my family (and i mean uncle, aunt and cousins lol) are good friends with his family. It was very confusing since i was not sure if he liked me back, but all of a sudden i started developing feelings for him. I do not know where these feelings came from since i told myself that i would never like him. I talked to my sister about it and i asked her if she thought he liked me back and she said she does not know. I told my mom, my mom told my dad and my dad asked me if i like him. He wasnt mad or anything, he actually started laughing.

    I told myself the person that would help me the most was my FOC. My FOC told me that i should not rush into things since i am not sure if he likes me back. He asked me if he told my he likes me and i said no. I then found myself telling him that whatever happens in the future, we would always be friends.

    this is going to be bolded since this is the advice that my FOC told me:

    treat your feelings for another person like you treat a seed. Put the seed in the fridge. After a while, go back to the seed. You should do this because you are not eliminating your feelings for this person, but at the same time, you are freezing it. You are not letting it expand then in the future, if he likes someone else, you would not get dissappointed.

    i thought this was perfect advise. Hope it helps.
  • I actually have a question, if jibrahim23 doesn't mind me posting it on this thread...

    how does it actually work; if every time a guy likes a girl he still won't tell her because he's worried it's gonna ruin something or another. and if a girl likes a guy she cannot even know if the guy likes her back? so is it a miracle every time a couple get engaged?
    it is really complicated. why isn't there some strategy to deal with these situations. otherwise, if that guy doesn't speak out early enough...another might already ask the girl out and she agrees. so the first guy would get heartbroken or something and the girl might have agreed to the other guy just because she thinks no one else would ever be interested in her. it is very annoying. especially in our church.
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