Concentrating in prayer

edited February 2008 in Faith Issues
I have this problem were when i pray my mind wanders around and i get distracted. and because of that i really dont feel prayer the way i used to feel it and i dont feel Gods presence with me, and i have stopped praying with the Agpia because of this because i feel there is no point to it. Does anyone know how i can get back to feeelin Gods presence with me and enjoy prayer the way i used too?

Comments

  • well do u close the door while ur praying? Do u close ur eyes while ur praying? and do u close the lights while ur praying? if u don't do one of theses then u won't be able to concentrate because if u have the door open u will hear all kinds of sounds from outside that door. if u don't close ur eyes then ur eyes will wonder during prayer. if u don't close the lights then u kind of don't feel alone!! do u know wut i mean!! i hope i helped!!
  • don't stop praying the agpeya. that's exactly what satan wants you to do. sometimes feelings of being far away from God are tests to see if we will continue to seek God and pray to Him and such. not praying wont help you come closer to God. persistence in prayer will though. it's what st. anthony did to overcome his temptations and be near God

    jasmine
  • [quote author=gigglyshy link=topic=6161.msg81756#msg81756 date=1201964248]
    don't stop praying the agpeya. that's exactly what satan wants you to do. sometimes feelings of being far away from God are tests to see if we will continue to seek God and pray to Him and such. not praying wont help you come closer to God. persistence in prayer will though. it's what st. anthony did to overcome his temptations and be near God

    jasmine

    gigglyshy is correct!
  • [quote author=soldier for scetis link=topic=6161.msg81751#msg81751 date=1201956533]
    I have this problem were when i pray my mind wanders around and i get distracted. and because of that i really dont feel prayer the way i used to feel it and i dont feel Gods presence with me, and i have stopped praying with the Agpia because of this because i feel there is no point to it. Does anyone know how i can get back to feeelin Gods presence with me and enjoy prayer the way i used too?



    You aren't alone on that, I've tried everything,  I just can not stand anymore, I'm basically turning into a hunchback as we speak, and I have back and standing problems, also since I haven't prayed for a long time, I now am sick with a really terrible cold!  I've noticed if you don't pray God will be very upset with you, and might try to help you in different ways, bad or good, I don't mean like very mean things I mean things we can recover from, but anyway *Thirsty+For+Christ* is right about closing your door, it helps, and if someone barges in and either yells you name out, or knocks loud and very hard on the door, still don't mind them, it's your time with God, remember the God will always be there for you no matter how "tired" you are, we all come up with excuses some days that will enable you to pray at all that night or any night, don't let those lousy excuses get inside your head, for whatever reason, I think I should take this advice for myself as well!!

    Forever,
    Coptic Servent
  • Yeah I have the same problem but I pray as a family.Sometimes When i finish praying i feel i didnt pray.
  • Somebody said that praying daily is like practising a musical instrument if you are a professional. You need to keep at it whether you feel like it or not.

    A monk told me to bat thoughts away during prayer like a ping-pong player bats his celluloid ball. He also said not to crave or expect 'treats' in the form of good feelings. They just feed our sense of self esteem and thwarts our growth toward humility.
  • [quote author=aidan link=topic=6161.msg81763#msg81763 date=1201972133]
    Somebody said that praying daily is like practising a musical instrument if you are a professional. You need to keep at it whether you feel like it or not.

    A monk told me to bat thoughts away during prayer like a ping-pong player bats his celluloid ball. He also said not to crave or expect 'treats' in the form of good feelings. They just feed our sense of self esteem and thwarts our growth toward humility.

    realy nice!!!
  • Mar Gregorios bar Hebraeus, a great Syrian Orthodox Father and ascetic of the thirteenth century, similarly advised that it's simply a matter of solid training and persistence. He advised that for inner distractions a violent inner struggle is required to purge such distractions from the mind. He warns us that it is a bitter process, which is why many people choose rather to just give up. But the reward in the end is sweet enough to compensate. Once we have broken through, and our intellect receives but a small sip of the sweeteness of the presence of God in prayer. Then, all our thoughts will naturally be focused upon prayer--but that represents the stage of perfection; it is a difficult and long process for it to be achieved.

    Mar Gregorios also advised that the way we spend our daily time will affect whether and to what degree we are distracted during prayer. The more you spend your time in a manner that draws you closer in attraction to wordly things, the more likely you are to be distracted. The more you spend your time in a manner that draws you closer in attraction towards the spiritual, the more likely you are to not be distracted. He gives an analogy whereby he compares thoughts of distraction to flies. Every time you wave a fly away, it simply comes back over and over again. Why? Because of the sweetness of the object that it is attracted to. If the fly did not think it to be sweet, it wouldn't be so persistent in coming back for it at all. Likewise with thoughts, if your life is pre-occupied by the pursuit of worldly things then your thoughts are likely to be continually drawn to them as you attempt to pray.

    Lastly, Mar Gregorios emphasises that we should not wait until we have been purified of distyracting thoughts before we pray, lest 'we would resemble those who look after perfection before labouring.' Rather we should offer our distracting thoughts to God during prayer, and He will supply us with the Grace necessary to overcome them.
  • [quote author=*Thirsty+For+Christ* link=topic=6161.msg81754#msg81754 date=1201963570]
    well do u close the door while ur praying? Do u close ur eyes while ur praying? and do u close the lights while ur praying? if u don't do one of theses then u won't be able to concentrate because if u have the door open u will hear all kinds of sounds from outside that door. if u don't close ur eyes then ur eyes will wonder during prayer. if u don't close the lights then u kind of don't feel alone!! do u know wut i mean!! i hope i helped!!


    Thanks everyone for ur help and contributions, just some things i need to clarify

    I pray the prayer before sleeping, and when i do, everyone in my house is asleep and i close my door anyway. However i dont close my eyes when i pray because i dont know the whole prayer of by heart, i pray with the lights on because i need to see what i am reading and concentrate on the icon of Christ which i stare at wile praying. i used to pray with candles but my mum told me not to just in case i literally burn the house down. when i pray with candles i like it more,i feel a churchly and Godly atmosphere as if im in one of the monasteries in Egypt, so wat do i do do i disobey my mum and pray with candles so i can pray or do i listen to my mum and just keep perseviring in my struggles. i feel the most distracted wen i pray the psalms and do metanias for the 41 keryelaysons. Does anyone have any advice on wat i should do to start feelin God presence with me and stop gettin distracted?

    Thanks once again for ur help and support, i like the sayings and analogies shared in this post if u have more that are related to this topic plz share
  • I don't think you should disobey your mom, but just talk to her about how much it helps and stuff like that, maybe you'll work out a compromise, like maybe you can keep those febreze or glaze candles in your room then when you're done with them, blow them out, maybe she'll agree!! What makes you distracted, what kind of distractions do you have? Let out your feelings and/or emotions about anything you want to improve, make up a poem, write a song, listen to one those are all ways to help you stop getting distracting!!

    Forever,
    Coptic Servent
  • [quote author=soldier for scetis link=topic=6161.msg81769#msg81769 date=1202009920]
    [quote author=*Thirsty+For+Christ* link=topic=6161.msg81754#msg81754 date=1201963570]
    well do u close the door while ur praying? Do u close ur eyes while ur praying? and do u close the lights while ur praying? if u don't do one of theses then u won't be able to concentrate because if u have the door open u will hear all kinds of sounds from outside that door. if u don't close ur eyes then ur eyes will wonder during prayer. if u don't close the lights then u kind of don't feel alone!! do u know wut i mean!! i hope i helped!!


    Thanks everyone for ur help and contributions, just some things i need to clarify

    I pray the prayer before sleeping, and when i do, everyone in my house is asleep and i close my door anyway. However i dont close my eyes when i pray because i dont know the whole prayer of by heart, i pray with the lights on because i need to see what i am reading and concentrate on the icon of Christ which i stare at wile praying. i used to pray with candles but my mum told me not to just in case i literally burn the house down. when i pray with candles i like it more,i feel a churchly and Godly atmosphere as if im in one of the monasteries in Egypt, so wat do i do do i disobey my mum and pray with candles so i can pray or do i listen to my mum and just keep perseviring in my struggles. i feel the most distracted wen i pray the psalms and do metanias for the 41 keryelaysons. Does anyone have any advice on wat i should do to start feelin God presence with me and stop gettin distracted?

    Thanks once again for ur help and support, i like the sayings and analogies shared in this post if u have more that are related to this topic plz share


    praying with one candle lit in front of an icon of Christ helps me a lot too. maybe try explaining to your mom why you need the candles. my parents don't like me lighting candles, but they don't mind me using one for praying, as long as I don't leave the room with the lit candle unattended.

    i used to have a hard time praying the psalms. i still do, but what i have found to help me is asking God to help me pray them better and I also try to relate to all that is written in the psalms that I am praying, since many of them we can relate with..

    i usually find that i have nothing else to say after praying the psalms because everything that I wanted to say was already said through the psalms.

    i look forward to seeing what people say about the 41 kyrie eleisons thing. i struggle a lot with praying that because i am always too busy trying to count all of them and don't know how to just focus on God while praying them...

    jasmine
  • For the 41 Kyrie eleison and the metanios, those are prayers as of themselves. you are worshiping God and asking for forgiveness from your sins or for him to help you or whatever you are praying for. Generally your FOC will tell you to do a certain # of metanios for a certain sin or for an issue you wish to have solved. God Knows your heart and will help you in your prayers.
  • [quote author=Iqbal link=topic=6161.msg81767#msg81767 date=1202002986]
    Mar Gregorios bar Hebraeus, a great Syrian Orthodox Father and ascetic of the thirteenth century, similarly advised that it's simply a matter of solid training and persistence. He advised that for inner distractions a violent inner struggle is required to purge such distractions from the mind. He warns us that it is a bitter process, which is why many people choose rather to just give up. But the reward in the end is sweet enough to compensate. Once we have broken through, and our intellect receives but a small sip of the sweeteness of the presence of God in prayer. Then, all our thoughts will naturally be focused upon prayer--but that represents the stage of perfection; it is a difficult and long process for it to be achieved.

    Mar Gregorios also advised that the way we spend our daily time will affect whether and to what degree we are distracted during prayer. The more you spend your time in a manner that draws you closer in attraction to wordly things, the more likely you are to be distracted. The more you spend your time in a manner that draws you closer in attraction towards the spiritual, the more likely you are to not be distracted. He gives an analogy whereby he compares thoughts of distraction to flies. Every time you wave a fly away, it simply comes back over and over again. Why? Because of the sweetness of the object that it is attracted to. If the fly did not think it to be sweet, it wouldn't be so persistent in coming back for it at all. Likewise with thoughts, if your life is pre-occupied by the pursuit of worldly things then your thoughts are likely to be continually drawn to them as you attempt to pray.

    Lastly, Mar Gregorios emphasises that we should not wait until we have been purified of distyracting thoughts before we pray, lest 'we would resemble those who look after perfection before labouring.' Rather we should offer our distracting thoughts to God during prayer, and He will supply us with the Grace necessary to overcome them.


    Thanks Iqbal. I had confession the other day in a long time, and Abouna told me about another Abouna who was talking to a lady. The lady was complaining how her prayers seem so dry, arid and lukewarm; to this the presbyter asked her, "But do you still pray?" The girl answered, "yes, I do father." At this the Presbyter remarked, "You are better than me. I feel the rewards of prayer- they give me comfort. This makes me pray regularly. But you pray without feeling immediate rewards. That is discipline."

    I don't think that was an altogether accurate recount of what Abouna told me, but I think all the same prayer is a means and the goal. Like any skill, we only get better at it with diligence and persistence. My confession father told me, "to some, persistence is victory".

    Remember the widow who insisted on justice? The lazy Judge gave up and gave her what she wanted. How much more would our Benevolent God would give when you insist; especially on the most sublime means to Him?!
  • [quote author=clay link=topic=6161.msg81776#msg81776 date=1202020937]
    [quote author=Iqbal link=topic=6161.msg81767#msg81767 date=1202002986]
    Mar Gregorios bar Hebraeus, a great Syrian Orthodox Father and ascetic of the thirteenth century, similarly advised that it's simply a matter of solid training and persistence. He advised that for inner distractions a violent inner struggle is required to purge such distractions from the mind. He warns us that it is a bitter process, which is why many people choose rather to just give up. But the reward in the end is sweet enough to compensate. Once we have broken through, and our intellect receives but a small sip of the sweeteness of the presence of God in prayer. Then, all our thoughts will naturally be focused upon prayer--but that represents the stage of perfection; it is a difficult and long process for it to be achieved.

    Mar Gregorios also advised that the way we spend our daily time will affect whether and to what degree we are distracted during prayer. The more you spend your time in a manner that draws you closer in attraction to wordly things, the more likely you are to be distracted. The more you spend your time in a manner that draws you closer in attraction towards the spiritual, the more likely you are to not be distracted. He gives an analogy whereby he compares thoughts of distraction to flies. Every time you wave a fly away, it simply comes back over and over again. Why? Because of the sweetness of the object that it is attracted to. If the fly did not think it to be sweet, it wouldn't be so persistent in coming back for it at all. Likewise with thoughts, if your life is pre-occupied by the pursuit of worldly things then your thoughts are likely to be continually drawn to them as you attempt to pray.

    Lastly, Mar Gregorios emphasises that we should not wait until we have been purified of distyracting thoughts before we pray, lest 'we would resemble those who look after perfection before labouring.' Rather we should offer our distracting thoughts to God during prayer, and He will supply us with the Grace necessary to overcome them.


    Thanks Iqbal. I had confession the other day in a long time, and Abouna told me about another Abouna who was talking to a lady. The lady was complaining how her prayers seem so dry, arid and lukewarm; to this the presbyter asked her, "But do you still pray?" The girl answered, "yes, I do father." At this the Presbyter remarked, "You are better than me. I feel the rewards of prayer- they give me comfort. This makes me pray regularly. But you pray without feeling immediate rewards. That is discipline."

    I don't think that was an altogether accurate recount of what Abouna told me, but I think all the same prayer is a means and the goal. Like any skill, we only get better at it with diligence and persistence. My confession father told me, "to some, persistence is victory".

    Remember the widow who insisted on justice? The lazy Judge gave up and gave her what she wanted. How much more would our Benevolent God would give when you insist; especially on the most sublime means to Him?!


    wow that's an amazing story that abouna told you... thanks for sharing that. very edifying for me..

    jasmine
  • whenever you get distracted, my FOC says to pray about whatever your distracted by... just stop and start again.
  • [quote author=soldier for scetis link=topic=6161.msg81769#msg81769 date=1202009920]
    [quote author=*Thirsty+For+Christ* link=topic=6161.msg81754#msg81754 date=1201963570]
    well do u close the door while ur praying? Do u close ur eyes while ur praying? and do u close the lights while ur praying? if u don't do one of theses then u won't be able to concentrate because if u have the door open u will hear all kinds of sounds from outside that door. if u don't close ur eyes then ur eyes will wonder during prayer. if u don't close the lights then u kind of don't feel alone!! do u know wut i mean!! i hope i helped!!


    Thanks everyone for ur help and contributions, just some things i need to clarify

    I pray the prayer before sleeping, and when i do, everyone in my house is asleep and i close my door anyway. However i dont close my eyes when i pray because i dont know the whole prayer of by heart, i pray with the lights on because i need to see what i am reading and concentrate on the icon of Christ which i stare at wile praying. i used to pray with candles but my mum told me not to just in case i literally burn the house down. when i pray with candles i like it more,i feel a churchly and Godly atmosphere as if im in one of the monasteries in Egypt, so wat do i do do i disobey my mum and pray with candles so i can pray or do i listen to my mum and just keep perseviring in my struggles. i feel the most distracted wen i pray the psalms and do metanias for the 41 keryelaysons. Does anyone have any advice on wat i should do to start feelin God presence with me and stop gettin distracted?

    Thanks once again for ur help and support, i like the sayings and analogies shared in this post if u have more that are related to this topic plz share


    Maybe you should not concentrate on one picture of Jesus so much.  I have been told that it sets a barrier between you and God.
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