What to do in my situation?

Hello everyone,

I have a question, but as this is my first post here, I thought I'd combine it with a quick intro!

I am a 36 year old male. I'm a US citizen but I'm currently living in Hanoi, Vietnam with my wife (a Philippines citizen) and five month old daughter. We are a Roman Catholic family, but we are on opposite sides of the spectrum. My wife is a Catholic in name only, while I'm pretty conservative.

A few years ago, I watched a documentary about an Anglican vicar that visits Fr. Lazarus in the desert before spending some time out there himself (I'm sure you've all seen it before, but if not, it's called "Extreme Pilgrim"). Anyways, after I first saw the documentary, I began researching the Coptic Church and have a deep love for it. I want to convert, but I have two problems that I would like to ask for advice on:

1. Here in Hanoi, there are no Coptic (or Eastern Orthodox) Churches that I know. The only Eastern Orthodox Church that I know of is in Vung Tau, which would require me to take a plane to. Now, I plan to live here in Hanoi for about 2 more years, after which I will probably move to Canada or the Philippines (undecided at the moment). Is there any way I can go about converting if I wanted to? If so, who would I have to talk to? Is it even possible, or would I need to wait until I get to an area with a Coptic church? If it matters, I regularly attend the Catholic Mass every Sunday, but it can be burdensome on me spiritually.

2. Even though my wife is Catholic in name only, she has shown resistance to me converting to Coptic Orthodoxy. She even gets frustrated if she sees me reading Coptic literature. There have been times, however, that she's shown a willingness for me to convert, but I was hoping someone in a similar situation could provide guidance. Did your spouse convert as well, or did they just allow you to while they remained in their faith?

Thank you in advance for any help, and I look forward to interacting with all of you.

Comments

  • damooster, thats a tough situation indeed. What I would recommend is to use this time to learn as much as you can. When you convert you will want a church close by that you can receive communion frequently. I would recommend visiting an Orthodox church when you can, for right now, then when you move, say to canada, you can visit one more frequently and then convert. If you do move to Canada I recommend close to the Kitchner area, great church there with a great priest. 

    As for your wife, be patient. Focus more on the similarities until she is comfortable with Coptic Orthodoxy, then as time goes by you can show her the historical deviance of the Roman Catholic church, which is very evident and easy to prove. For now however, be patient and keep peace in the household. Patience goes a long way, trust me I learned the hard way. 

    My advice, don't rush it. Use this time to learn in order to prepare yourself for conversion and frequent this website and feel free to ask any questions you wish.
  • saint john cassian is a saint in the catholic church who learnt a lot from the egyptian monks. he wrote some very good things.
    so i think you should research his writings and study the Bible and fast and pray.
    God will lead you to other Christians who also long for a deeper spiritual life.
    include your wife in your journey by showing her things when she is interested and accepting her beliefs when she is not interested.

    find out also about philippino saints as well and read their life stories.
    i know a very spiritual catholic philippino priest here in the uk, so there are catholics who also love God very much and follow Him.

    it sounds like your search will end in the orthodox church, but God will teach you very much right where you are if you are patient and kind.
    i am still the only orthodox Christian in my family (working on it!) so i understand it can be hard.
    but i finally got to the stage (after 5 years) where i am not rushing anyone anymore. i can see God is working in their lives, so i try to be patient, just as God is patient with me.
    :)
    may God lead u and give u peace
  • Hello Damooster,

    Did you ask your wife why she is against this? Does she know that we are apostolic , like the Catholic Church?

    One thing you can do, even if you are far from a Coptic Church, is to engage in the following:

    a) Praying from the Agpeya (Book of Hours - its mainly Psalms etc)
    b) Sharing with us in our fast.

    The way we fast is very simple: we just go Vegan.

    Orthodoxy isn't just about going to a new Church, its a way of spiritual life.

    By already reading the stories of our saints, and following their wisdom, you have engaged in Orthodoxy.

    By making your home a Church, and living in Holiness as part of your daily life, you have engaged in Orthodoxy.

    By learning the tasbeha, and our hymns, you have engaged in Orthodoxy.

    However, one thing that IS very orthodox, is the Liturgical Worship. This is central to our life. I'm sure for Catholics its the same also. However, the difference between our churches lies in how we pursue and prepare for partaking of this Divine Mystery.

    If you do become Orthodox, then the above tips would well prepare you for your introduction into our Church; if you remain Catholic (which is STILL OK), then you'd have benefitted greatly from reading the Agpeya and praying from it as well as from fasting.

    Definately do not convert if it ruins your marriage. Orthodoxy isn't a religion that opposes catholicism where you have some war going on between both sides. This is NOT the case. If you love our spirituality, our spiritual treasures, our saints, our Hymnology, our spiritual/patristic heritage, then welcome on board. You'll be more coptic orthodox than anyone!!


    God bless your decision.
  • Thanks everyone.

    @Zoxsasi my wife is against the idea because she is basically against "rules" which is why she's a nominal Catholic. In fact, she's been going to the local Protestant service while I go to Mass.
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