Okay, how to get around unwanted *convos*!

edited August 2011 in Personal Issues
Hey everyone,
In the Name of the Father Son and Holy Spirit One God Amen

I feel that God has been causing me realize alot of things as of late, he has helped me to let go of things that were keeping me from being better spiritually. I had a few issues just this past year with things that are now not a big deal to me at all, by the Grace and mercy of God. I have been trying to continue this trend of realizations by dropping old habits (facebook) and adding new ones, ( like reading Spiritual articles and books), or instead of talking on the phone, listening to a sermon.

....but it seems easier to do these things when I'm by myself, its when people come into the scenario that things become more difficult. Keeping clean interactions with people. For example, I have my group of friends who are all Orthodox and involved with church- we have a unique bond in that we are young American born youth who really love our faith. We support each other by talking about the status of our churches and giving one another pointers and things of the sort and just talking about anything really.
Sometimes though we venture into "gossip" territory or for example one of my friends vents to me about someone at her church who makes he/she angry or who did something ridiculous. I try to give he/she advice on what to do or tell the friend to make excuses for the person but sometimes it actually makes the situation worse because they argue with me about how there is no excuse. I want to say this is inappropriate, lets change the subject but then I feel bad and don't want the person to feel ashamed or that I am acting as if I am a better person or something so I end up quietly listening to the story. and feeling bad afterward.

I don't know how to handle it when people gossip without being rude or seeming to act as if I am better which is not true? How do you guys handle this? Any advice?  ???

Im not only looking out for my spiritual life but also there's because I know they are running the race of Christianity and as their Christian sister, I don't want this to be a stumbling block
This also goes for any inappropriate talk by the way!! How to get around it?!


  • + Irini nem ehmot,

    Many times I spoke, and as a result felt sorry, but I never regretted my silence. - Abba Arsenius
  • Try changing topics, or you can tell her it is bothering you. Note, your fears are unfounded- she probably will not think of you as arrogant, especially if you do this alone.
    ""If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over." - Matthew 18:15.
    As a Christian, you should not turn the other cheek. We are created for fellowship, and must help each other realize our faults/strengths and overcome them together. Remember, when telling your friend you must also be careful of your wording.

    For instance, do not say this, "Wow, you are really sinful! Stop gossiping, ya shetan!!!!!!"
    Instead, when she mentions someone, say something like this "Hey, I know, but at least she goes to Church and demonstrates a want to fulfill her spirtual life. It is our duty to help her, where we find she is lacking. Do you think you can mention your problem to her? I think it will work for both your benefit!"
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