Hey everybody.
Maybe it’s a long story but I will try to make it short and clear. AND PLEASE READ IT ALL BECAUSE I NEED HEPLP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I am 16 years and live in Europe. I know a boy for about 2 years now, and he is illegal and came from Egypt.
Firstly we were only friends, but than it became differently.
He said first he saw me as his sister, but then he said he loves me and wanted to meet me.
I know it’s bad, but the situation now is different, so that I will tell afterwards.
I felt also I love him, and we met regulary after schooltime in secret, my father doesn’t know about him. The first time I met him we only talks 3ady yani as friends.
But the times afterwards, he wanted to kiss me, and I did.
Al that time, we talk with each other every day in telephone, and meet eachother.
But sometimes I saw he is not clear to me, and I get confused.
He started to talk with me about he wanna makes sx, he dind’t do I t before.
I refused, because I don’t wanna sin for God.
He first only jokes, but I saw he really want it.
This happened about a half year (nos sana2).
Then, I felt it’s really bad and I felt sorry for God, and I really didn’t wanna sin.
And do something in dark and secret.
So I said to him: ‘’What we are doing know its bad. Al those things, kissing, and hug, and talk about bad things, do you think it’s from God or satan?’’ he laught a bit ( in telephone) and said, no it’s from satan. So I said ,okay, so t’s bad and I don’t wanna kiss, and that anymore. He said okay. And he said we wil be friends only.
I confessed everything to abouna.
On 7 january 2008 he wanted to met me, to say happy x mas) He lives nearly by the church) and I went to the church. So when he get from his work he said he is waiting me in the neighbourhood of church.(it’was about nos el lil, evening)
So I met him. And I saw he actually was scared to ask what he wanted from me, and he said he wanna kiss on mouth. I said ‘’no’’ he said: okay on ur cheek. I said ‘’ no’’ .
I get angry and went away and left him. Than a time after happens this, we talked again I telephone. But I made him clear I don’t wanna do that any mote( kiss , etc)
We met again, but when he again tries to kiss me I said no. and really try to make him clear it’s a sin. Then he get sad. When we said bye to eachother, he said I will call you today. From that day (In February) I nothing heard from him everything 1 year, until 2 weeks ago.
It was really hard for me to forget everything. I couldn’t reach him by telephone, so I realised It's better to stop.
Than after a really long hard period, I get better with, school and spiritually life.
I went abouna again (another one) and said that I still miss him. He said it’s normal.
I dind’t see him in church, and then very sometimes he went to church.
A month ago (tagriban) My friend said, he saw him regulary in the church in mass, on wednsday and Monday ( I am at school at that time) and that he ‘so- called/would be’’
Really prayed, and sing in mass, and take holy communion. ( body and blood of Christ)
I first couldn’t believe, but I asked many times again, and she said it’s really true.
So I was happy. I felt there’s was still hope that he returns go God, because that's what I want: that he felt sorry and return to God. In That time and the time I didn’t talk to him, I really prayed for him with fire and tears, that he will return, cause I love him (as a brother.) So I saw him again in the church and we had eyecontact.
I started to phone him ( but I was really doubt I will do it or not) and he was happy. He said he wanted to call (phone) me min zaman, but he lost my number.
I from the beginning made him clear, I don’t want to return the sins, and the past is over. He said, he go to church. I asked him: do u take communion , he said no, I have a sir that I can’t tell to anyone. I said him he has to confess. He said, okay later. He said he did the sin 1 year ago (sex) one time and the he really felt sorry. He said on that reason he didn't phone me because he is sad) I could see he meant it. So I all time encourage him to pray, and go to mass, and confess and take communion. I get tired. He promised me he will do it, and yesterday he went to church, confessed and took communion.
So what I am wanna say is: I see he want return to God, but he’s weak. And I see him like a brother but he still loves me as his girlfriend and he can’t stop calling me ( phoning) and love me.
I wanna help him to return and get better, I really WANT IT, but I am afraid I will get weak again, and I really DON’T WANT RETURN FROM MY HEART TO THE SINS but I see he also want convert and I don’t wanna leave him and be afraid he will return again to sins, cause I encourage him.
PLEASEEEE HELP MEEE , I amSO SORRY about The LOngggg storyyyyyy but I really NEED HELPPPP!!!!!
Pray for me, thank you.
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Comments
Min il akher, stop talking to him. You can't help you. You have a past with this person that is clouding your judgment, and I'm sure you mean well, but you really can not help him. Leave it to abouna to handle. You should stay out of it and ideally, not contact him at all. You may seriously not want to go and do what you did in the past, but the chances of it happening are too high to risk. So my advice to you is to leave the counseling, and the checking up to abouna and abouna alone. You focus on your self and your spirituality.
I read your story and I can see where you are coming from. The situation is complicated because there are a lot of emotions involved.
I will give you some advice in my humble opinion, even though I am the last one to help out in a situation like this.
1. Every one is weak - Your emotions are very strong and they will definitely make a lot of problems for you and will get in the way of your service to him. It's very hard to talk with him and get him closer to God when you have feelings towards him. It will also be very hard for him... even though you are encouraging him to go to church.. you might also distract him because he starts to think about you more and he will get weaker.
2. God is the heart changer - In the end, it is Jesus Christ that will change his heart and make him love the church and build his relationship with Christ. God is in control and he will bring him back to Him with or without you. So don't think that if you don't encourage him that he will be lost. God cares about him more than anyone in the world!
3. Prayer moves mountains - My advice is that you keep praying for him. Keep him in your prayers and put his name on the altar. It's also good to tell your confession father about your concern for him so he can take care of him. I think it's very wise that you have this relationship with your confession father. Have faith that God will work in his heart and will change him and keep praying.
By doing this, you still care about his spiritual life, your confession father knows what's going on, and you are keeping yourself distant from him so that both of you don't become weak. By doing this, you keep yourself away from the devils temptation but at the same time your concern from him and your prayers are not lost before the sight of the Lord and God willing they will be answered.
Lastly, don't focus to much on his spiritual life, and make sure you are growing in your life and getting closer to God. Keep growing and going to the mass and getting closer to God!
God Bless!
Hope I helped
Please pray for me and I will pray for you and your friend too!
God Loves You!
Hi Bride of Jesus,
I read your story and I can see where you are coming from. The situation is complicated because there are a lot of emotions involved.
I will give you some advice in my humble opinion, even though I am the last one to help out in a situation like this.
1. Every one is weak - Your emotions are very strong and they will definitely make a lot of problems for you and will get in the way of your service to him. It's very hard to talk with him and get him closer to God when you have feelings towards him. It will also be very hard for him... even though you are encouraging him to go to church.. you might also distract him because he starts to think about you more and he will get weaker.
2. God is the heart changer - In the end, it is Jesus Christ that will change his heart and make him love the church and build his relationship with Christ. God is in control and he will bring him back to Him with or without you. So don't think that if you don't encourage him that he will be lost. God cares about him more than anyone in the world!
3. Prayer moves mountains - My advice is that you keep praying for him. Keep him in your prayers and put his name on the altar. It's also good to tell your confession father about your concern for him so he can take care of him. I think it's very wise that you have this relationship with your confession father. Have faith that God will work in his heart and will change him and keep praying.
By doing this, you still care about his spiritual life, your confession father knows what's going on, and you are keeping yourself distant from him so that both of you don't become weak. By doing this, you keep yourself away from the devils temptation but at the same time your concern from him and your prayers are not lost before the sight of the Lord and God willing they will be answered.
Lastly, don't focus to much on his spiritual life, and make sure you are growing in your life and getting closer to God. Keep growing and going to the mass and getting closer to God!
God Bless!
Hope I helped
Please pray for me and I will pray for you and your friend too!
God Loves You!
Hey billious, thank you soo much for you help :) your advice is really good, thank you really, I will try to do what you say, but it still it's very hard to leave him.....and I am a very weak person...:(
Rabina ma3ek and God bless you
[coptic]+ Iryny nem `hmot>[/coptic]
Min il akher, stop talking to him. You can't help you. You have a past with this person that is clouding your judgment, and I'm sure you mean well, but you really can not help him. Leave it to abouna to handle. You should stay out of it and ideally, not contact him at all. You may seriously not want to go and do what you did in the past, but the chances of it happening are too high to risk. So my advice to you is to leave the counseling, and the checking up to abouna and abouna alone. You focus on your self and your spirituality.
Thank you also very much Κηφᾶς, I will try it, pray 4 me and my weaknes.
Thank you also very much