Everyday I wish my life would end. Regardless of whether I'm having a good day or not. There is no time when I ever feel any attachment to life..I would happily walk away from it all.
I don't know what's wrong, I've had these feelings for years..they just get stronger over time. It's like I gave up on life since I was very young and growing up doesn't seem to resolve anything.
It's not that I want to escape responsibility, because so far if I may say so myself, I have been working hard, passing exams, getting into college. But I never enjoy life. Nothing makes me happy. To me life is a chore and when it is up to me I'd rather go home and stay there and do nothing.
I go to sleep wishing that I wouldn't wake up in the morning and I get through everyday by looking forward to sleep because It's the only relief I get.
It's a stupid phrase to say but I wish I never existed...life to me isn't as valuable as I should be viewing it. I find myself praying that god would just end my life because "i've had enough" and I think that's so bad that it would be better to not pray at all.