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seriously considering it.
  • I am seriously considering suicide. I have many internal issues that I can't discuss with anyone that I have been struggling with and I really can't handle it anymore. Please pray for me.
  • Listen to your own advice - I thought it was great.

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=11866.msg141577#msg141577 date=1310773601]
    I wrote a short story about this.  It's titled Suicide.  It will come out in a week or so...definitely before August 10th.  I will send you the link to it when it does come out.  I hope that you would take the time to read the story and think about the message in it and decide against doing something like that.  Please don't do it.  If you understand Arabic, listen to this...it's powerful...and very comforting.


    [/quote]

    "But he who endures to the end shall be saved." (Matthew 24:13, NKJV)

    Prayers of the saints be with you and comfort you.

  • Why can't you discuss those issues with anyone? Alot of people are forgiving so please try. You need support Godlovesme. The internal stuggles are obstacles you need help with. Fear is large for some, so please try to fight it. Satan kills what we love. He hates that we commune with others with love and understanding. His desire is the hate of love. If you are depressed then maybe you get angry and people don't respond the way you would like them too, they don't understand. I wish I was there to support you.

          "I, even I, am he who comforts you.
          Who are you that you should be afraid
          Of a man who will die,
          And of the son of man who will be made like grass?
     
          And you forget the Lord your Maker,
          Who stretched out the heavens
          And laid out the foundations of the earth;
          You have feared continually every day
          Because of the fury of the oppressor,
          When he has prepared to destroy
          And where is the fury of the oppressor?

          Isaiah 51 12:13            Satan destroys the ones we love.

        My heart goes out to you.  May God give you relieve from your stuggles.
  • I would like to echo the good words of Joshuaa. To hear of another child of God suffering in pain grieves all of our souls. Please do not think that you cannot reach out to someone and share with them your struggles. I am sure everyone here wants to help you. You are never alone. From the meditations of St. Ephraim the Syrian, the Lyre of the Holy Spirit, I can share with you what has helped me in times of despair, in hope that the saint's words will reach you now:

    Do not lose heart, O soul, do not grieve;
    Pronounce not over thyself a final judgment for the multitude of thy sins;
    Do not commit thyself to the fire; do not say: The Lord has cast me from His face.

    Such words are not pleasing to God. Can it be that he who has fallen cannot get up? Can it be that he who has turned away cannot turn back again? Dost thou not hear how kind the Father is to a prodigal?

    Do not be ashamed to turn back and say boldly: I will arise and go to my Father. Arise and go!

    He will accept thee and will not reproach thee, but rather rejoice at thy return. He awaits thee; just do not be ashamed and do not hide from the face of God as did Adam.

    It was for thy sake that Christ was crucified; so will He cast thee aside? He knows who oppresses us. He knows that we have no other help but Him alone.

    Christ knows that man is miserable. Do not give thyself up to despair and apathy, assuming that thou hast been prepared for the fire. Christ derives no consolation from thrusting us into the fire; He gains nothing if He sends us into the abyss to be tormented.

    Imitate the prodigal son; leave the city that starves thee. Come and beseech Him and thou shalt behold the glory of God. Thy face shall be enlightened and thou wilt rejoice in the sweetness of paradise. Glory to the Lord and Lover of mankind who saves us!


    God be with you. He really does love you.  :)
  • Hello GODlovesme,
    I hope all is well and that you are feeling better,
    sometimes letting people know how you feel is a way to get a relief and a peace of mind. But most importantly let God know how you feel-

    "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28 -30


    Committing suicide is not a solution to an issue that God is capable of handling, please get whats in your heart out to God and someone who can be trusted so you can live the life God has planned for you.

    You are GOD's beloved no matter what anyone may say or the world might say,cause we are living for the Heavenly Kingdom not the worldly.
    Be strong-cause if God is with you who can be against you.

    Here is a  sermon that might help:

    http://orthodoxsermons.org/sermons/finding-joy-part-1

    Your sister in Christ,
    May the prayers of those who pleased God from the beginning be with us all AMEN
  • As long as you are still breathing, there is still a chance.

    Once you decide to cut that breath, you cut every chance of hope.

    I don't care how bad your life is, you are still an individual created by God Himself...and you have a purpose in this life. You have a role to play in this world, and you can't just give up. You have so much to live for, and you don't even know it.

    Christ died...so that you don't have to.

    If you choose to cut short your life which God gave you, you lose every chance of living forever with God Himself.

    You have one life that is given to you. Make the most out of it.

    Whatever situation you are in, it will pass. Nothing lasts forever.

    Hang in there, life will get better...trust me it always passes.

    Don't you want to see what your life will be like in 20 years? Don't you want to see your kids? Your grandkids? Your spouse?

    Don't give up. Think of the endless pain your loved ones will have to live with. You'll torture them, and you'll make them hate themselves for the rest of their lives.

    Find your purpose in life. Ask God to guide you through this struggle.

    Life is short enough. People die in famines, and in wars, and from all types of diseases. And you want to throw away your precious life.

    Please contact your Father of confession, or the Priest at your local Church ASAP and tell him how you feel. You won't be the first person to share that with him either. 

    Cry out to the Lord with all your heart. Pray with tears to the One Who suffered for our sake. Pray to Him and say "Lord Help!" as if you were drowning, and He will hear His precious child. He will give comfort to the one He made with His own hands.

    "In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul."
    (Psalm 94:19)

    Killing yourself and throwing away it all way isn't worth it...period. Live the life that you have, and be thankful for it. Because as bad as it may be, you still have ten fingers and you're still breathing.

    (Private message me if you want to talk)

    May God give you His peace and grant you His grace and abundance for the rest of your life.

    +++
  • [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg144997#msg144997 date=1316643900]
    I am seriously considering suicide. I have many internal issues that I can't discuss with anyone that I have been struggling with and I really can't handle it anymore. Please pray for me.
    [/quote]

    Why can't you discuss anything with anyone? We are always here. We don't know what your real identity is so you don't need to be embarassed, all we know you as is our brother GodLovesMe. Even when you tell us about your problems, i assure you that we won't look at you in another way, but we will give you advice because when we give you advice, we all learn from it not just the person with the problem. May God be with you and please be more open to discuss your issues here on this forum.

    May God's peace be with you always.
  • Unworthy1,
    That's the sad thing about me. I can give advice but when it comes time to follow it, I can't...one of the reasons I stopped posting on this site in the first place. The video is still nice though, I forgot that I had seen that. Thank you for the reminder and please pray for me, I need it.

    Joshuaa,
    I have really complicated internal issues; I seem to be okay to people on the outside but when they get to know me really well or we discuss any one of my internal issues, they tend to think that I'm extremely weird and kind of avoid me after (mainly because they can't understand what I'm trying to say), I speak from experience...therefore, I have begun to keep my issues to myself. I don't even know how I'm going to explain what I'm going through right now to my FOC. It involves many factors and a lot of different emotions (#1 being extreme self-hatred) due to some situations that happened recently. I'm afraid of being rejected...it's happened way too many times already and it hurts A LOT. Some people just don't understand and can't handle certain things. Thank you so much for your care and support. I appreciate it. And thank you for the verse, it was really nice...I didn't even know it existed in the Bible. Please pray for me a lot.

    dzheremi,
    I've already tried speaking to people about this in the past. In the past, people didn't have time...others can't understand what I'm saying, some just don't care...how shall I say this? I'm a really interesting personality, it's really hard to be close to me and sometimes it gets to a point where it's also really hard to care about me...this time, it's really complicated, like I said, I don't even know how I'm going to explain it to my FOC. Thank you so much for that quote. That actually helped me a lot as did the other verses people posted. Please pray for me a lot.

    Thanks be to God Always,
    I sincerely hope I start feeling better soon...there's several occasions in which I seriously considered suicide, this being one of them, and they seem to get worse each time...thank you for the sermon, I will check it out. Please pray for me.

    +TheGodChrist+,
    Thank you for your kind words. I'm not really sure why God created me actually...I'm pretty useless. That's the only thing that's keeping me from committing suicide...perhaps through some crazy chance, I might have a chance of going to heaven...crazy but perhaps...I doubt my life will get better, it seems to only get worse...in certain aspects of my life, I've already lost complete hope. My loved ones won't suffer if I die...no one will...a lot of people will be much happier actually...it would save them a lot of trouble. You're right though...I should be thankful for what I have. Thank you.

    geomike,
    I stated above why I can't discuss it with anyone. All I can say is that I hate myself right now...that's what led me to consider suicide. It's too complicated to explain why I hate myself but I do...thanks for your support though. I appreciate it.

    Aegyptian,
    Thanks.
  • Sometimes, it's not that people don't care but they are dealing with a slew of family issues like trying to keep multiple family members alive as they are struggling with extreme diseases.

    Your sign-on name underscores, at the minimum, an acknowledgement.
  • Hey man, I'm like you.

    I hate myself a lot!!! Is this good, no, not at all haha. We, you and I both, have to get out of this SIN (thats what it is)!
    Why do you feel such hatred, why are you so afraid of rejection. PM me with anything on Earth you want to say; trust me, with matters of internal affairs I feel like I'm pretty up there :P

    Regardless, realize, brother, that no matter what you do, God loves you. No matter what sin you commit, God has conceived a plan for you to follow to live a joyous life with Him in it! "We work FROM grace, not for it!!" NOTHING we can do can please God; thats releiving, isnt it? Stop being so harsh on yourself; GOD doesn't punish you as much as you punish yourself.

    We are told at an early age to "love our neighbors as ourselves". We take this the wrong way, sadly. We show all the love to our neighbors, and not nearly enough to ourselves. I believe the commandment said AS ourselves, not greater, nor less than.

    God is working within you; this will become a time of great prosperity for you if you can pull through. Just realize, that no matter what happens, no matter what failure comes, tomorrow brings a new day, and a new chance. We fail if we stay down, but we suceed if we try; it is just a matter of time.

    God Bless You!
  • FYI everyone: Godlovesme is female  ;)

    Dear GLM,

    We all give advice that we don't follow. We are all hypocrites. Take a look at my posts! If I followed half of them, you might chant my name in the glorifications soon, lol. But we all fall short. It's not a surprise to God and it shouldn't be to you.

    Know this: You are precious in the eyes of our Lord.

  • Why is her sex relevant o.O?
  • [quote author=liftmyheart link=topic=12381.msg145048#msg145048 date=1316738429]
    Why is her sex relevant o.O?
    [/quote]

    Well, I didn't want to call you out but let's look at your post. . .

    liftmyheart said:

    Hey man, I'm like you.

    I hate myself a lot!!! Is this good, no, not at all haha. We, you and I both, have to get out of this SIN (thats what it is)!
    Why do you feel such hatred, why are you so afraid of rejection. PM me with anything on Earth you want to say; trust me, with matters of internal affairs I feel like I'm pretty up there

    Regardless, realize, brother, that no matter what you do, God loves you. No matter what sin you commit, God has conceived a plan for you to follow to live a joyous life with Him in it! "We work FROM grace, not for it!!" NOTHING we can do can please God; thats releiving, isnt it? Stop being so harsh on yourself; GOD doesn't punish you as much as you punish yourself.

    We are told at an early age to "love our neighbors as ourselves". We take this the wrong way, sadly. We show all the love to our neighbors, and not nearly enough to ourselves. I believe the commandment said AS ourselves, not greater, nor less than.

    God is working within you; this will become a time of great prosperity for you if you can pull through. Just realize, that no matter what happens, no matter what failure comes, tomorrow brings a new day, and a new chance. We fail if we stay down, but we suceed if we try; it is just a matter of time.

    God Bless You!
    (emphasis mine)

    That's why it's relevant.
  • well then WOAHman* and sister*, the rest still applies. :)!

  • Whatever we try to do for you is in the grace of rightousness, so who is to judge rightousness. If we speak of doing good because God has brought us to that position in our live, or if we have learned it from the Holy Bible, or our Church Fathers. Know that any good deed that we do for you that keeps you part of our flock is because of the Shepherd.
      What is missing in your life Godloves me? Tell us please.
  • I can say that the feeling that God loves her is definitely missing, which is ironic, isn't it. If you know God loves you, do not distress or be anxious. I want to say "how can you ever think such thoughts?!" But I know as well as you we are human, and our faith plummets and rockets. However, I dare you to rekindle your Love for God, I dare you to wake up today and say "I may not know what is going to happen today, I may not know what people will say of me today, I may not know if I fail today, but I know God, and he knows all this, and he would never harm me!"

    It's easier said than done. Here is what I suggest you do. PRAY. Pray pray pray. Pray as much as you can, whenever you're feeling down. IT IS NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE to NOT FEEL GOD'S LOVE when you Pray! It may come slowly, but it surely comes. Don't be discouraged or frustrated by the contents of your prayer; pour your heart out, your troubles, and literally say "God, here's your workload for the day."

    Listen to some sermons, meditate, read a book. Take time and find out what is causing this, how it can be fixed, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, what it can teach you. As RevRun says "The Lord is kind,, He did not bring you this far to leave you". Trust that God is working in you, and although you can't see the fruits just yet, be thankful for this hardship and allow God to better you. You must believe that God will never leave you, no matter what happens here. Pray for me
  • [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    I'm afraid of being rejected...it's happened way too many times already and it hurts A LOT. Some people just don't understand and can't handle certain things.
    [/quote]

    Rejected by who? If you know in your heart that God loves you, and that He sacrificed Himself so that you may live forever, WHO or WHAT else really matters? Are you really afraid of being rejected by people whose hearts go wherever the wind blows? 

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    +TheGodChrist+,
    I'm not really sure why God created me actually...I'm pretty useless.
    [/quote]

    You think you are useless? If anything, I am pretty sure that at least 1 out of 775 posts has made a difference in another human being's LIFE. It sure has in mine. See, you can impact others, and you've already shown it.

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    That's the only thing that's keeping me from committing suicide...perhaps through some crazy chance, I might have a chance of going to heaven...crazy but perhaps...
    [/quote]

    If a murderer (St. Moses the Strong), a prostitute (St. Mary of Egypt), a torturer and persecutor of Christians (St. Paul), and an adulteress (St. Photini) can all get into Heaven, I'm pretty positive you have a chance.

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    I doubt my life will get better, it seems to only get worse...in certain aspects of my life, I've already lost complete hope.
    [/quote]

    I know you're not this hopeless. Do you not know that the God who calmed the seas can also calm the storms inside your heart? Do you not know that the pain that you feel now was first felt by Christ? God...FELT...pain. And this is how He relates to us. He feels directly what we go through. He experienced your pain, and He overcame it. And because He overcame it, all who follow His footprints overcome their pain as well.

    Don't lose your hope in your God. He is mighty and has saved you many times before. Be fierce and fight this battle as any soldier would, and victory will inevitably be yours through the love and precious blood of Christ Our Savior.

    Pray the 1st, 3rd, and 6th hours of the Agpeya everyday for one week. Pray it with every passion and fiber in your being. Really give it your all. How can God just ignore you? Will He not bestow inner peace upon those who cry out to Him?

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    My loved ones won't suffer if I die...no one will...a lot of people will be much happier actually...it would save them a lot of trouble.
    [/quote]

    How dare you say that no one will suffer if you die. Every person you know will suffer. Every person on this site will suffer. Your Father of confession will suffer. Your Church will suffer. Your family will suffer (even if you may not believe it). I will suffer and be tormented for the rest of my life, and you don't even know me. Most importantly, you will suffer...and that is the greatest loss of all.

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    You're right though...I should be thankful for what I have. Thank you.
    [/quote]

    If you try to live a life of thanksgiving, cherishing every moment that God allows you to be on this Earth, you will see God's hand in your life. Your life will be filled with the grace of God, if you try to live a life of humility and thankfulness.

    +++

  • Hi Godlovesme,
                          Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. That is brave and shows some trust. As for feeling rejected. I'm adopted, I was born in rejection, a stranger in this world. These are people God works so hard on their minds and hearts, as they are different. Their identity is at stake the moment they are born. When I've read the gospel or anything else to do with Jesus Christ, I have strong feelings that he is a stanger in the world as well. But he knew everyone, and knew what they were going to do even though he gave them a chose.
      He was rejected before he was born and ended up in the manger, and then again when king Herod wanted him dead and he went to the safety of Eygpt. Which I believe our church has a special relation with God.
       
        I will come back with this.  Stay with us please.

                God bless you Godlovesme.
  • Thank you for taking the time to explain your situation to us, GODlovesme. I think I think I can empathize with some of this, though without specifics it is hard to say too much. I definitely know the feeling of people not helping or understanding, at least. But it is important to remember that sufficient for a day is its own trouble, so whoever may have let you down in the past or whatever you may have done or not done then, it is good to recognize that today, in fact right now is when people here want to hear you and try to help you. You are our sister in Christ. We will not let you go without a fight!

    And as in all battles and struggles, our strength is in prayer. So I will pray for you, and ask for the prayers of the saints to carry you through this period.

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
    dzheremi,
    I've already tried speaking to people about this in the past. In the past, people didn't have time...others can't understand what I'm saying, some just don't care...how shall I say this? I'm a really interesting personality, it's really hard to be close to me and sometimes it gets to a point where it's also really hard to care about me...this time, it's really complicated, like I said, I don't even know how I'm going to explain it to my FOC. Thank you so much for that quote. That actually helped me a lot as did the other verses people posted. Please pray for me a lot.
    [/quote]
  • ilovesaintmark,
    True...thank you.

    liftmyheart,
    There's too many reasons why I hate myself. I'm afraid of rejection because I've gotten rejected previously many times. Yes, God loves us true. I, however, have no good characteristics. Suppose that I die and stand before God without having done any good but more bad, what do you think God's response will be? Unfortunately I do feel that way sometimes. I know that God loves me but at times I feel abandoned for many reasons. Thank you for your posts. Please pray for me.

    Unworthy1,
    [quote author=Unworthy1 link=topic=12381.msg145041#msg145041 date=1316736020]
    Know this: You are precious in the eyes of our Lord.
    [/quote]

    Thank you.

    Joshuaa,
    You ask what is missing in my life? I will tell you: everything good (on my part). I possess no good qualities and I feel as if my purpose in life is severely skewed. At times, I don't know why I do certain things or that I'm doing them for the wrong reason. My spiritual life is messed up; therefore, it's having a negative effect on my regular life. I suppose I can say that what I'm missing in my life is faith. Thank you for your posts. God bless you too. Please pray for me.

    +TheGodChrist+,
    There's a reason why St. Moses the Strong, St. Mary of Egypt, St. Paul, and St. Photini all got into Heaven. They had strong faith and good characteristics/good works, neither of which I possess. LOL humility...o yeah, I forgot...that's like the #1 reason I hate myself. Thank you for your post though, it was uplifting as were other peoples'.

    dzheremi,
    Thank you for your post. It was uplifting.

    To everyone, thank you so much for your support and care. I appreciate it a lot.
  • [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
    liftmyheart,
    I, however, have no good characteristics.
    [/quote]

    What, in your opinion, are some good characteristics that you wish you had?

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
    Suppose that I die and stand before God without having done any good but more bad, what do you think God's response will be?
    [/quote]

    God is not counting how many times you fall...He's counting how many times you get up. The fact that you are trying to get help, is good. The fact that you care about your soul, is good. The fact that you are trying to change and get up from this period in your life, is good. The fact that you have even the slightest desire to help others on this site, is good. Just from these tiny observations, you can conclude that you have good within you. And this good inside of you was planted by God Himself. He doesn't want you to cut down the tree when a branch breaks. He wants you to keep growing, always striving to learn more and improve yourself.

    No one is born "good." We all fell from grace and inherit the nature of Adam. Life is a work in progress. Step by step, God changes you into the person He wants you to be. Don't look at life in the short term; look at it long-term, towards Heaven.

    Has there ever been a time in your life when you felt that God was truly there for you? 

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
    +TheGodChrist+,
    There's a reason why St. Moses the Strong, St. Mary of Egypt, St. Paul, and St. Photini all got into Heaven. They had strong faith and good characteristics/good works, neither of which I possess.
    [/quote]

    No, they didn't naturally possess strong faith. They didn't naturally posses good qualities. Murderer? Prostitute? Persecutor? Adulterer? Good qualities!? Can any "good" come from any of those professions?

    It's not about possessing these qualities. It's about working towards achieving them through God's grace. St. Moses the Strong didn't all of a sudden shake off his thirst for women. He worked at it, improving himself day by day, and always learning from his past. That's what you need to do.

    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
    LOL humility...o yeah, I forgot...that's like the #1 reason I hate myself. Thank you for your post though, it was uplifting as were other peoples'.
    [/quote]

    I don't mean humility in the embarrassing and funny type of way. I'm speaking about humility that has this attitude: "God I am truly and utterly worthless by myself and on my own...but because of your love, "I am the light of the world."

    We are God's glory, and He is ours. Believe that God can change you and it will happen.

    "...Whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." (Mark 11:24)

    +++
  • yeah good post, God does not need us to be good or lovely to work in us.
    we just need to come to Him as we are and He works with us.
    i know lots of people who are difficult to talk to and who have all sorts of problems, they are very much loved by God and i have learned a lot from them.

    please talk to your priest and your doctor.
    we are praying for you.

  •   My thoughts were like mabsoota's that the best thing to do is to see your priest or a counsellor. Both over the issues with rejection. Not to look for acceptance from others, as it's hard to please anyone. It maybe your reliance on others that makes you feel empty and that you can't be yourself. The reflection isn't there. If you were to relate then you need look no further than Jesus. If Jesus Christ's thoughts and the way he did things were the same as everyone he met then then we would never of heard of him. He gives life. 

        God bless you Godlovesme.
       
  • Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:

    Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.

    You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.

    CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.

  • [quote author=Gay4XC link=topic=12381.msg145170#msg145170 date=1316961051]
    Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:

    Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.

    You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.

    CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.
    [/quote]

    I agree with you Gay4XC, suicide doesn't end suffering.

    But with all due respect, Christ is not gay for you.

    You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.
  • [quote author=Gay4XC link=topic=12381.msg145170#msg145170 date=1316961051]
    Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:

    Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.

    You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.

    CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.


    [/quote]

    I am confused.. I hope that was a mistake or I am misunderstanding.
  • St. Athanasius wrote that "God became man so that men might become gods."
  • + Irini nem ehmot,

    [quote author=✞Stavroforos✞ link=topic=12381.msg145208#msg145208 date=1317008040]
    [quote author=Gay4XC link=topic=12381.msg145170#msg145170 date=1316961051]
    Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:

    Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.

    You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.

    CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.


    [/quote]

    I am confused.. I hope that was a mistake or I am misunderstanding.
    [/quote]

    You're misunderstanding.

    Bible Support

    2 Peter 1:4 explicitly speaks of becoming "partakers of the Divine nature". Closely allied are the teachings of Paul the Apostle that through the Spirit we are sons of God (as in chapter 8 of his Epistle to the Romans) and of the Gospel according to John on the indwelling of the Trinity (as in chapters 14-17).[1]. In John 10:34, Jesus himself quoted Psalms 82:1 in saying "Ye are gods."

    Patristic writings

    According to Jonathan Jacobs, there were many and varied appeals to divinization in the writings of the Church Fathers.[5] As what he asserts is "just a small sample", he lists the following:

        St. Irenaeus of Lyons stated that God "became what we are in order to make us what he is himself."[6]
        St. Clement of Alexandria says that "he who obeys the Lord and follows the prophecy given through him . . . becomes a god while still moving about in the flesh." [7]
        St. Athanasius wrote that "God became man so that men might become gods."[8]
        St. Cyril of Alexandria says that we "are called `temples of God' and indeed `gods,' and so we are."
        St. Basil the Great stated that "becoming a god" is the highest goal of all.
        St. Gregory of Nazianzus implores us to "become gods for (God's) sake, since (God) became man for our sake."

    Referring to such declarations by the Fathers, the Oxford Dictionary of the Christian Church says that the central tenet of deification is that, through the incarnation of his Son, God has called human beings to share God's own life in the Son. It quotes Athanasius: "The Word became flesh … that we, partaking of his Spirit, might be deified" (De Decretis, 14); and Cyril of Alexandria: "We have all become partakers of Him, and have Him in ourselves through the Spirit. For this reason we have become partakers of the divine nature" (In Ioannem, 9).[1]

    Saint Augustine pictured God telling him: "I am the food of grown men, grow, and thou shalt feed upon Me, nor shalt thou convert Me, like the food of thy flesh, into thee, but thou shalt be converted into Me."[9] "To make human beings gods," Augustine said, "He was made man who was God" (sermon 192.1.1) This deification, he wrote, is granted by grace, not by making part of the divine essence: "It is clear that he called men gods being deified by his grace and not born of his substance. For he justified, who is just of himself and not from another, and he deifies, who is god of himself and not by participation in another. … If we have been made sons of god, we have been made gods; but this is by grace of adoption and not of the nature of our begetter" (en. Ps. 49.1.2).[10]

    The Fathers spoke of the process of deification as begun, at least by prolepsis, in baptism, and so as already effected in the baptized.[11] Clement of Alexandria wrote: "Being baptized, we are illuminated; illuminated we become sons; being made sons, we are made perfect; being made perfect, we are made immortal. 'I', said He, 'have said that ye are gods, and all sons of the Highest."[12] Hippolytus: "He (man) is made God by water and the Holy Spirit after the regeneration of the laver."[13] "Thy body shall be immortal and incorruptible as well as thy soul. For thou hast become God."[14]

    However, full deification was seen as occurring only after death. Augustine said, "Our full adoption as sons will take place in the redemption of our body. We now have the first fruits of the spirit (Rom 8:29), by which we are indeed made sons of God. In other respects, however, since we are not yet finally saved, we are therefore not yet fully made new, not yet sons of God but children of the world."[10]
    Source
  • Thanks Aiernovi! :)
    Thanks Cephas, I get it now! :)
  • +TheGodChrist+,
    What are some good characteristics? Hmm genuine kindness? Patience? Humility? Thing is...I don't possess anything...thank you for that...you're right, God is the one who changes us...
    Yes, there are absolutely a number of times in which I felt that God was there for me...I just seem to forget those in times of trouble.
    What I meant about humility was that I do not possess it at all. I have so much pride in my heart...
    At any rate, thank you for your kind words and please continue praying for me.

    mabsoota,
    Thank you.

    Joshuaa,
    Thank you.

    Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement. Please continue praying for me.
    -GODlovesme
  • Salam Godlovesme & to everybody

    i have to say that i created an account just for this

    Rabenaa yebarek everybody that showed love and care for you Godlovesme

    i really have nothing to add after all those great things full of hope that have been said; however I really encourage you to follow up with a Christian counsellor. they are full of grace and you just can't help but talk your mind out to them and they give you such a feeling of peace.

    i will strongly encourage you to go on www.drnabilbaky.com he's the pioneer of chritian counselling

    please do that and post a question and he will respond to you (but make sure you mention the urgency)

    if you want msg me and we can talk (I am following christian counselling program - it's great)

    Rabenaa yebarek feeky and remember my weakness in your prayers
  • Hey GodLovesMe

    I would like to start off by saying, God Loves You,

    If you did kill urself I noe that certainly everyone would be in despair, I myself would also be soooooooooooooooooo sad I also dont noe u but to hear that is hurtful, i would think about u each day when i wake up in the morning, when i hav a moment to think.

    MY recommendations:
    -U SRSLY NEED TO WATCH 'TOUCHED BY AN ANGEL' THE MOST UPLIFTING, AMAZIN MESSAGES- IT IS A TV SERIES WITH 9 SERIES.

    YOU WOULD NEED TO WATCH ONE EVERYDAY, IT WILL LIFT U UP,

    GOD is wherever you are darling, He is watching over you, You need to think to yourself, and surly there r, miracles that God has done for you, there are definetly signs that He sends, also
    -THE BIBLE READ EVERYSINGLE  DAY
    -TAKE MOST OF URTIME, SPEAKING TO THE ALMIGHTY LORD.

    It is just a sin, to think of ever commiting suicide.
    DONT OK
    MAY GOD BE WITH YOU

    There are so many messages and things i can tell u. There is a reason for abslotuley EVERTHING that happens in the world. THere IS a reason why u r on this earth we humans until it that moment comes dont noe wat we r here for, but sooon ull see.
    cya THE LORD IS ALWAYS WITH U
  • hey, realising u r not perfect and wanting to change is a good point in itself  :)
    also u made many great posts here, we love u
    :)
  • +

    My blessed one,

    God is my witness:  I have done things in my life no one has.  Perhaps never in truth.  I am not allowed by the binding of priesthood to talk about them.  But as my brothers and sisters have mentioned, this feeling of extreme self-hatred is from the evil one.

    But remember this, for this is my consolation.  If you really want to express this extreme emotion you have without sinning against the One who did in truth die for you:  Commit yourself to a spiritual, spiritual, suicide.  If you want to let out all this great amount of poison from out of you, revolt yourself against this world and all that it holds:  Die from this world and give yourself completely to Him who would never reject you.  It is extreme, and this may be what the little breath of life of your soul is crying for.

    To give you a picture, though I hope you can make your own picture with your own beloved heart, I mean this:  Give yourself completely to God.  Do what no one has ever done.  You want to leave this world and separate from it, do it spiritually.  Do things like the following, and see the consolation it brings:  Do not ever again open the television of the world, but only fill yourself with what is related in every shape and form to the Lord Jesus Christ, such as the movies of the eternal Stars, the great Saints.  Do not go to a movie theater ever again, there where black and white has turned to, at best, grey my beloved sibling.  Kill everything inside of you that separates you from God, and spend all the days and nights and years unloading from your heart the warm and sweet tears kept inside, which are so precious to the King... for only a human being created in the image of God can do that.  Even angels do not.  Fill your room with the heavenly pictures to your liking, and feast your eyes there as much as you want.  Do not spend your time anymore in any kind of worldly talk, any kind of friendly gossip, any kind of vain chats that are only to kill time.  When you are surrounded by people, secretly speak to your Lover who is waiting for you... who knows, maybe He is even waiting for you in a monastery, in a poor country to do something that is greater than yourself...  but what is sure:  He is waiting for you in the secret chamber of your heart.  When you are driving in the streets, or moving about in a car; let the billboards and advertisements fill the ill minds and be for all the other people... not for you.  And when you cannot endure noise, find a quiet place and stay there as long as you want.  And when you are filled with peace, tune your ears to the heavenly sounds of your choice, but no other.  Do this for everything.  For the rest of your life.  And you will see the consolation and change Christ will quickly bring into you.

    In this way consider your extreme emotions.  For the person who does not need this kind of medication, it will sound at variance with him due to how they perceive life and its "pleasantness" as they are deceptively tasting it.  But for you, it may be what you are waiting for.

    Your emotions, believe it or not, may be a tool the Healer of souls is using to draw you to Him...  to draw you to Him instead of all those who are happy with this life, in this life, and find no extreme need for God.

    May the Lord Jesus Christ show you His greatness in His love, and bless your life in a way you never expected it... through and out of the great pain you are tasting, most precious child of God.

    You are in my prayers, and that of the Mother of God and the hosts of Heaven,

    In Christ Jesus.

  • Wow. I am pretty sure that the one who posted, Forgiven, is a priest.

    The most best advise I ever read: this is because every word of it is true, which I know.

    Thank you for posting, because you not only helped a beloved soul whom we all love, but others too.
  • + Irini nem ehmot,

    [quote author=Forgiven link=topic=12381.msg145794#msg145794 date=1318028514]
    To give you a picture, though I hope you can make your own picture with your own beloved heart, I mean this:  Give yourself completely to God.  Do what no one has ever done.  You want to leave this world and separate from it, do it spiritually.  Do things like the following, and see the consolation it brings:  Do not ever again open the television of the world, but only fill yourself with what is related in every shape and form to the Lord Jesus Christ, such as the movies of the eternal Stars, the great Saints.  Do not go to a movie theater ever again, there where black and white has turned to, at best, grey my beloved sibling.  Kill everything inside of you that separates you from God, and spend all the days and nights and years unloading from your heart the warm and sweet tears kept inside, which are so precious to the King... for only a human being created in the image of God can do that.  Even angels do not.  Fill your room with the heavenly pictures to your liking, and feast your eyes there as much as you want.  Do not spend your time anymore in any kind of worldly talk, any kind of friendly gossip, any kind of vain chats that are only to kill time.  When you are surrounded by people, secretly speak to your Lover who is waiting for you... who knows, maybe He is even waiting for you in a monastery, in a poor country to do something that is greater than yourself...  but what is sure:  He is waiting for you in the secret chamber of your heart.  When you are driving in the streets, or moving about in a car; let the billboards and advertisements fill the ill minds and be for all the other people... not for you.  And when you cannot endure noise, find a quiet place and stay there as long as you want.  And when you are filled with peace, tune your ears to the heavenly sounds of your choice, but no other.  Do this for everything.  For the rest of your life.  And you will see the consolation and change Christ will quickly bring into you.
    [/quote]

    Realistically speaking, how practical is all this? What you seem to be advocating is for one to live as a hermit in the world. While for some, they have answered the monastic call, it is not for everyone. We live in the world, and there is nothing inherently wrong with that. What is vital is that the world does not live in us. It seems the only true way to fulfill what you suggest is to run off to a monastery or nunnery. That is not for everyone. Surely there must be other, more moderate spiritual exercises that one can practice while still remaining in the world, and not cutting oneself off from it entirely.
  • Cephas,

    I understand your point of veiw that not all people are able to achieve this life because of our society that we have today, but I also want to explain, why I said it was good advise.

    One time, I repented everything within my heart and I made a decision and commitment to give my life to christ even though we are in america.

    It is practical in every way:
    -Instead of reading romantic novels, I started to read spiritual books by HHPope Shenouda.
    -Instead of listening to Lady Gaga or Rihanna or whatever singers that have corrupt songs, I replaced it with listening to spiritual songs and learning hymns.
    -Instead of watching movies at the theater, I began watching saint movies.
    -Instead of spending my time with bad friends at school, I found many girls that go to my COC that are also at the same school, and started to get closer.
    -Instead of telling anything that's bothering me to a friend, I tell in to God.
    -Instead of submitting to eating all food during fasts, I fasted to see if I could contol myself.
    -Instead of contributing to the bad things at school, I became idependent, and usually sat with a spiritual book in my hand.
    -Instead of spending time all the mall with friends, I go to church.
    -Instead of sleeping in on Sundays, I go to take the blessing of unity with Christ

    You might ask: but won't everyone tease you for not being like them?
    No. In fact, everyone will like you much better because they will see that you are independent. Dont be mean and say "Im just being independent" but love everyone because Christ has made them for a reason. In truth, the devil might send you people who are opposing everything you do and make fun of you, but, thats where trust in God comes from.

    You might also ask: What do I benefit from it? I am still too young.

    You are never too young or too old to start a relationship with God. When you forget the world and its corrup nature, you realize  that world has no value. You start to have a relationship with God, full of peace and Love and gentleness. You give God your everything and he is always with you. You begin to have this desire to grow in your relationship, to serve him in anyway you can. In all of your thoughts, you think of God. When you fall you think of God and try to get up and reach further because you trust in him.

    It will come to a point that because you love God so much, you will love anyone and everything that was made by God. This means you will never complain and you will never hate anyone. You will never fear anything because you know the God the almighty always has your back.

    Then at another point, you won't feel that God is with you, all of the love that you felt was vanished and your left with a choice: either to be faithful and loyal to God, or to go deep into sn again. This time can be tricky tricky for some, like it was for me. Some people will cry and say "Why has God left me after we built this strong relationship?" I can say that God has never left you, he is watching to see if you continue the relationship. Others will say "I feel confused and like I don't trust God." At this, the devil makes you think that you don't trust God, but in fact you do. The devil will make you misrable during this time...he will do whatever he can to drop the relationship you have with God.

    How?
    By scaring you. In dreams, in your life, in your feeling. His goal is to make you drown from problems. He will give you more temptations, and when he finds one that works well with you, he will stick to it.
    THIS IS CRITICAL. You Have the choice to:
    1) Plead for gods strength and trust in him
    2) Submit into sin and don't trust in God.

    God wants you to do #1. The devil, however wants you to do #2. You have to do all that you can to ge past this with trusting God. Its the only way.

    Another question: How long is it to achieve this state?
    Have you ever heard with every day you spend your life with God its is counted, and everyday you don't spend with God its as if you didn't live it? That is the point. I made the commitment when I was in seventh grade and now I am in tenth grade. There were many days I didn't spend with God in between. It depends on you if you want to make the choice of spending that day with God or not, and each day will count.

    Also: How did you start growing with your relationship?
    All it took was one decision and an action to follow it. I started to research stites with christian books I can relate to, download songs I can easily memorize and sing in trouble, and sermons I can listen too when I need advise. This is where the verse "seek and you shall find, ask and it will be given to you, knock and it will be opened to you" comes in. All you have to do iss work hard to find God and understand him, and he will give you so much grace, joy, love.

    When you work with God to leave the world, you will notice that you grow strong in the vitues and friuts of the spirit. You will be amazed when you analyze yourself, how your actions reflect the fruit of the spirit.

    When you gain love of God, he will grant you so many blessings, he will give you understanding to deal with others around you. He will always talk to you through anything around you. He will give you the peace in your heart no one can ever aquire except from god Himself.


    You see, all of this is very practical in ones life. You don't have to be a monk or a nun, or a saint to leave the world. Leaving the world just simply means to grow in christ.

  • very good practical advice.
  • God bless you, Coptic Strength. That is fantastic. Keep being a good example of the way we should all be living (including especially me), no matter how old we are or where we live. :)
  • Hello Beloved brother/sister in Christ.
    Do you hear that? Although I dont know you, you are my beloved brother/sister in Christ. God loves us beyond our human comprehension and He taught us that we are one body in Him, please don't take away from the Body of Christ.
    You are hurting HIM more than anyone when you think this way. Because the soul you have right now was bought by the blood of Christ even the thoughts to kill yourself are like spitting in our Almighty God's face. You are precious in HIS sight, you are especially important to him. Job went through so many struggles but he remained faithful to God and in the end God made the problems pass and Jobs life was blessed and beautiful. Everything you are going through EVERYTHING Will pass.

    You will make the devil who is putting you through these problems rejoice if you do this horrific thing.

    In Luke 15:10 our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ says "  Likewise, I say to you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents."

    bu tif you do this terrible thing, the angels will cry, do you know why? Because your soul will be lost to the devil and there is worst suffering than you ever endured on Earth because you destroyed the soul that God Himself came into human form to give life for. Through the Cross, He overcame death (Satan). So by Him you can overcome anything, by the power of His Cross you can fight this horrible situation. God is there no matter what don't lose hope in your Creator, stick by HIM like Job and you will overcome. Because the One who is leading you is the One who overcame Satan, so through God you will also overcome EVERY problem.

    God HIMSELF promises in Isaiah 41:10: "Fear not, for I am with you;
          Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
          I will strengthen you,
          Yes, I will help you,
          I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’
    PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP HOPE MY BELOVED BROTHER/SISTER!!!!!!

    "How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
            How great is the sum of them!
    If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand;
            When I awake, I am still with You."
    -psalm 139:17,18

    PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP.

    FIRST OF ALL YOUR BODY IS NOT EVEN YOURS , IT IS BOUGHT BY THE BLOOD OF CHRIST. Can you imagine God Almighty, the Lord of All chose willingly because of HIS LOVE to die for you, so you could have hope of eternal life with HIM and the devil wouldn't have control anymore. Please don't give the devil control, God who overcame death, can help you overcome this situation. Please brother/sister don't do this thing don't even consider it at all. Rebuke the devil and all the things he is telling you. Carry your cross and know its strength, that the devil fears it because God has overcome the devil through it. If you don't have a cross on your neck, get one and begin to Rebuke the devil by saying this prayer that the Ethiopian/Eritrean Orthodox Church says with their cross:
    The Cross is our Power
    The Cross is our Strength
    The Cross is our Redemption
    The Cross is the Salvation of our Souls
    -Amen-
    SAY THIS with ALL YOUR FAITH. GOD overcame death(satan) through the Cross, this means when you have faith in His Cross's power, you can also overcome satan anytime. DON'T LOSE HOPE. the devil will try to make you doubt but rebuke Him and don't listen to his discouraging words. GOD says you have power through His Cross so you do.

    GO TO A CHURCH AND SPEAK WITH THE PRIEST ABOUT YOUR WHOLE SITUATION, ASK GOD TO HELP YOU WITH THE INTERCESSION OF THE SAINTS. DON'T LET YOURSELF BE IN DEVIL'S PUPPET. By ending the precious life God gave you, you will cause the devil to rejoice and the angels to cry for sadness over your soul.

    GET A STRONG CHRISTIAN FRIEND and build a community that supports you.Its out there go get it and express to the priest that you are looking for this. ALSO DON'T put all your hope in people, Make sure ALL your hope is In GOD ALMIGHTY He will never disappoint you, just remain faithful and know HE IS GOD.

    Have faith in God, He will bring you through and overcome your situation like He overcame death (satan) by His Holy Cross.

    DON'T MAXIMIZE YOUR PAIN AND SUFFERING IN THE AFTERLIFE BY KILLING YOUR BODY WHICH IS NOT EVEN YOURS BUT BOUGHT BY THE HOLY BLOOD OF THE LORD JESUS CHRIST.

    WHEN YOU BECAME A CHRISTIAN, YOU DID IT TO HAVE A NEW LIFE DON'T CAUSE YOURSELF TO SUFFER A GREATER DEATH BY DOING THIS TERRIBLE DEED.
    GOD LOVES YOU TOO MUCH FOR YOU TO END THIS WAY, DON'T EVEN CONSIDER IT. REBUKE THE DEVIL FROM YOUR MIND AND YOUR LIFE. GIVE YOUR SITUATION TO GOD, ASK HIM TO FORGIVE YOU AND HE WILL CARRY YOU THROUGH, I will keep you in my prayer beloved brother/sister in Christ. 

    May the Prayers of the our Mother of Light St.Mary be with you and the Prayers of All the Saints and Angels.
    Amen

    Love your sister in Christ
  • so GodLovesMe, what's going on, mind on updating us on your situation?
  • You know someone ought to condense this stuff into a spiritual article - some great advise all around in this thread!
  • [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg144997#msg144997 date=1316643900]
    I am seriously considering suicide. I have many internal issues that I can't discuss with anyone that I have been struggling with and I really can't handle it anymore. Please pray for me.
    [/quote]

    I am deeply sorry to hear the burdens in your life are causing you so much sadness.

    Can you take a vacation for a few weeks? Perhaps that would help.

    God be with you and give you the peace and joy that your heart is longing for.
  • Thanks for the advice everyone.

    [quote author=geomike link=topic=12381.msg146272#msg146272 date=1319074379]
    so GodLovesMe, what's going on, mind on updating us on your situation?
    [/quote]

    I'm extremely depressed :'( There's a lot going on right now...I'm trying to ease my anxiety and have more faith in God but I just don't know...there's too many important things on the line...actually, it would be a miracle if anything went right...and if they go wrong, I just don't know what to do anymore :'(

    Zoxsasi,
    Vacations are not an option...I have too much school...thanks.

  • I really really pray for your comfort, Godlovesme.
  • I recommend you watch this AMAZING video:


    And here is the extended version:


    It just reminds me of the Greatness of the God who loves us.
  • [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg146302#msg146302 date=1319136231]
    Zoxsasi,
    Vacations are not an option...I have too much school...thanks.
    [/quote]

    lol... nice answer, but don't you think your life is more important than school. A vacation isn't just about having fun, its about distancing yourself from your problems or things causing you problems.

    I regret deeply not taking a vacation when I was in your position.
  • [quote author=Zoxsasi link=topic=12381.msg146330#msg146330 date=1319171284]
    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg146302#msg146302 date=1319136231]
    Zoxsasi,
    Vacations are not an option...I have too much school...thanks.
    [/quote]

    lol... nice answer, but don't you think your life is more important than school. A vacation isn't just about having fun, its about distancing yourself from your problems or things causing you problems.

    I regret deeply not taking a vacation when I was in your position.
    [/quote]

    You know there is such a thing as spiritual vacation right? It's so convenient you can do it in your house, or where ever you are. Just assign a certain day that all you will do is read the bible and pray. That's just all you do. It sounds kind of boring and cheesy, but honestly it works and takes away a lot of problems. I say this from experience. My FOC told me to do it, and i don't regret doing it at all.
  • [quote author=geomike link=topic=12381.msg146331#msg146331 date=1319173236]
    [quote author=Zoxsasi link=topic=12381.msg146330#msg146330 date=1319171284]
    [quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg146302#msg146302 date=1319136231]
    Zoxsasi,
    Vacations are not an option...I have too much school...thanks.
    [/quote]

    lol... nice answer, but don't you think your life is more important than school. A vacation isn't just about having fun, its about distancing yourself from your problems or things causing you problems.

    I regret deeply not taking a vacation when I was in your position.
    [/quote]

    You know there is such a thing as spiritual vacation right? It's so convenient you can do it in your house, or where ever you are. Just assign a certain day that all you will do is read the bible and pray. That's just all you do. It sounds kind of boring and cheesy, but honestly it works and takes away a lot of problems. I say this from experience. My FOC told me to do it, and i don't regret doing it at all.
    [/quote]

    Geomike,

    That does indeed sound very good, however, i would recommend that even a spiritual retreat would be better.

    I really think, if someone is depressed, to the point of suicide, that they ought to not be preoccupied with school etc, but with their own well being.

    Of course Geomike, a spiritual vacation is indeed what is needed as suicide is a spiritual problem. Its not a physical one. People don't commit suicide because their iPhone 4S doesn't tell them the time when they ask it to.

    But - perhaps its best they get out of the house, and have that spiritual exercise in a monastery, or in a retreat of some kind... I regret not doing that.

    I know that focusing on your studies is good, and responsible, but we are always studying.. its endless, but if a problem becomes deep rooted in your heart, its very hard the problems it causes later on.

    I would focus on solving this issue that's causing you to be depressed and then worry about your school later.


Memorial for HH Pope Shenouda

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