why are parents so over protective?

edited December 1969 in Faith Issues
hey guys my parents are really over protective and its gettin to be really anoiyin i wanna no if any of ur parents r over protective why parents are over protective n is there a way to make it stop? ???
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  • Lol, yeah I agree Marmar. Parents are overprotective because they love you A LOT. They don't do it just for fun, lol. Sometimes, we don't know what's best for us and we can't see why our parents do the things they do, so we think they're so strict. But don't worry about it, all you have to do is show them that you're trustworthy, and that you always have your best interests at hand. Once they start seeing that you know what you are doing, hopefully they'll not be so strict. But yeah, it's just like with God, sometimes (well, most of the time), we don't know why he does things, but later on in life, we realize it and thank Him sooooo much for protecting us the way He did. I hope everything works out well with you. :D ;)
  • thanks guys u really helped alot :D
  • David, let me tell you something. Bishop Moussa went over this topic with us at ECCYC, and at our church when he came to visit. He says that it's not over-protection, they're doing what they feel is right. For example, we have our freedoms, to eat, to read, to listen to music. If we abuse these privileges, we become slaves to them, and therefore are not "free", but bound by our pleasures, so to keep that from happening, our parents do what they see fit.

    sleepy
  • Dont also forget that parents have life EXPERIENCE, we tend to think we know better than them, but we actually don't. Think about it, we are stubborn and think we know everything rite? But ur parents are the only ones who care most about u (besides God obviously). We are still young and make mistakes, why not learn from our parents and avoid mistakes they made...
  • If you haven't realized, everything that parents say will happen, usually does happen, so save yourself that pain...lol

    sleepy
  • true sleepy, very true indeed lol, my mum always predicts all those things, and they ALWAYS come true, i just dont get it ???
  • in ways all you have said is tru..........but i think eygptian parents are to over protective! i think that is cuz of their culture and how they were brought up....sorry 2 say most egy parents are especially more strict with grls.....i believe most of them are sexist....i guess thats cuz of were they come from were women dont have that many rites....i sorry for sounding to harsh but its 2....if an egy sees a grl talking to a boy than she is a tramp....if a boy is talking to a grl than he is ok....how is that in anyway fair...and i realli dont think it has to do anything with trust .....egy just dont like change and r 2 stubborn to be more open minded......they preferr to stay the same.....it sucks! and u cant say any of this isnt true i speak from experience and i have seen and heard things
  • Thats true, but not ALL parents are like that, but i was speaking more in general before. This topic is just difficult with egyptian parents, and we just cant do anythin about it. It's just a generation that will eventually be replaced by the second generation that's more open minded (hopefully).
  • um...that's not really always the case, some parents are just stricter than others, and women ( christian at least) in egypt do have rights. I think some may be stricter about girls talking to guys and all, cuz ppl tend to talk more about a girl who's like that then a guy, so the parents are only doing wat's best, cuz they dont want anyone to talk bad about their daughter. and put urself in their place, would like that to happen to ur daughter????!
  • [quote author=SisterInChrist link=board=1;threadid=571;start=0#msg9494 date=1093472593]
    they dont want anyone to talk bad about their daughter. and put urself in their place, would like that to happen to ur daughter????!


    true, but if all people were open minded, than u wouldn't have to fear that...there's hope for the coming generations God willing ;)
  • That's true, but it's kids in our day and age that have given us such a bad reputation. If parents haven't heard about something bad that happened to a kid, or by a kid, then they wouldn't take so much effort to watch out for us. When they know or feel that nothing bad will happen to us in a certain situation, they don't stop us from doing it, or being there, but if they know that something happened before hand that may harm us, they take many precautions to keep us safe, which is what we call "over protective".

    sleepy

  • [quote author=david1995 link=board=1;threadid=571;start=0#msg9452 date=1093454536]
    hey guys my parents are really over protective and its gettin to be really anoiyin i wanna no if any of ur parents r over protective why parents are over protective n is there a way to make it stop? ???


    coz we r egyptianz...lol :P......im sure thats correct ;D

    after everyones writing,over 2 pages....my answer is probably the one ur lookin for :P

    GBU ;) ....all
  • ;DOMG u took the words right out of my mouth arubaiscrazy. I completly agree with you. Egyptian parents are soo overprotective of girls that it has gotten to the point where the girls don't trust their parents anymore. I know people that do not do anything wrong, but are forced to lie to their parents when they go out even if they're just going out to a friend's house. I know that's wrong and I'm not supporting them. I'm just saying if you can trust your boy why can't you trust your girl. I mean all egys do when you ask why your brother can go somewhere and you can't is keep blabbing aloong about how he's a guy and you're a girl. Personally when my parents sayy that I go ballestic. I don't care if i get in trouble I just speak what I believe. How are you gonna try to tell me that a child is gonna listen to you when she sees you prisoning her at her own home. If she's not gonna do anything bad when she goes out then let her go. Come on, it's gotten to the point with some of my friends and me that they can't go to church camps cause there's guys there. My brother can go out of the country on week trips but I can't go to church at night cause my dad can't come with. I mean come on get real.
    And for sleepymusician. I understand what you're trying to say about our parents protecting us from things they see happening to our generation, but they got all wrong. Egyptians came to America and protected their traditions. So how are you gonna tell me that just because the Americans are the ones out doing the crime, we have to pay the time. hteir overprotection can harm the child more than it can help them. It can get so bad that the child can lie for the simplest things because she's afraid of getting in trouble.
    I understand how you say it's only this generation and the next will correct their mistakes, but that's not true. I'm a very hyper person and everyone knows that in my church. So when I'm talking to a guy and he pushes me (in a brotherly way) and I push him back, it's no problem because I treat them all like brothers and they treat me like their sister. One of my friends told me not to hit them because they're guys, they can hit me because I'm a girl but they I can't hit them because they're guys. The girl is 15 and she's already racist. I'm sorry, but this is too much. You should see the stuff my brother can do, me NO WAY, they'd kill me.

    Sorry guys for blabbing on. I know ou do't care, but in my family this is a HUGE problem!!! :'(
  • no, but like, its sooo not fair--
    cuz I have a brother-- and he gets to do practically whatever he wants-- its like ma salama---
    And then when its me, they go like-- o kol lohom walad-- bla bla bla!!
    Btw, me n sleepy and i forget who else agreed about the whole thing i quoted up top, the part about girls n guys-- check the thread labeled guys-- page 17...lol
    no but seriously-- my parents don't let me do like anything--
    I mean like cuz im a girl---
    There are so many things that guys can do that we can't and that really makes me mad!!
    (imagine if i was born before girls got schooled)
    I'd explode
    ugh ugh uhg!!!

    i totalyl agree with u maramar and lordhavemercy.... its such anti-girls thing... nooo fair!!! my little brother gets do wateve rhe wants... i mean seriously..and hes nto even older!! hes younger!!! it really makes me blowwwwww >:(
  • hell yea! im not confining any daughter of mine to the house!!!
  • if u think the only over protective parents are the egyptian ones, um....I dont think u've seen any azn parents. they like dont let their kids do ANYTHING.so stop blaming EVERYTHING that ur parents do on their nationality!!!!!!!!! but anyway, the point is again, that they dont do that cuz they dont like us or cuz they're egyptian, it's cuz they love us and want the best for us.
  • [quote author=NotOfThisWorld link=board=1;threadid=571;start=15#msg9519 date=1093525254]
    And for sleepymusician. I understand what you're trying to say about our parents protecting us from things they see happening to our generation, but they got all wrong. Egyptians came to America and protected their traditions. So how are you gonna tell me that just because the Americans are the ones out doing the crime, we have to pay the time. hteir overprotection can harm the child more than it can help them. It can get so bad that the child can lie for the simplest things because she's afraid of getting in trouble.


    I know what you mean, I'm a gal too...lol
    It's not that we're paying for thir mistakes, more like, our parents have seen the bad things that come out of it, and want to protect us from it.

    sleepy
  • it's asian parents, u know the ones from Asia( dont they have some where u r ??) sry if my spelling confused u, but yea, they are known to be VERY strict, even more than egyptian parents.
  • Sorry but its not fair to say Asian parents are known to be very strict, Asia is the largest continent on the world and holds more then half the worlds population ( about 3/5ths to be exact ) ; its countries range from Russia to Iraq to India to China, we cant stereotype them and say they are known for this or that. Their cultures range to much to sum their disciplinary methods in once sentance.
  • o, I'm sry if I offended anyone :-[, I just meant to say that its not only egyptian parents, it's all good parents. cuz I mean, we already said that it's cuz they love us, so wat's all the complaining about??!! ???
  • we all complain about our parents at one point or another...and u say u'll raise ur kids differently, but u'll end up raisin ur kids the same way. i kno sum parents really are that strict, but they only mean well. Not all of them are that bad. sometimes they may drive u a lil crazy, but they only want u to be the best. and its wrong to say that "all egyptian parents" or "all asian parents" are this way. u cant sterotype all the parents. my uncle used to be soo strict on his daughter...and then all of a sudden he let everything go...you shud see her now...she barely goes to church, wears wutever she wants, and goes wherever she wants. he shud have found a balance between the two. ur complainin now about ur parents and how u wish they wudnt do those things and (God forbid) wen sumptin happens to them ur gonna wish they were there to yell at u or not let u go out or wutever. so give them a break and try to work sumptin out wit them...u kno they love u and want wuts best for u...neway, ill be quiet now
  • yea but its crazy....
    azn parents are so stricted cuz they want their kids 2 be amazing at everything........but i have asian friends and they have more freedom than i do....and i noe egy parents' also want the best for their kids....yet it doesnt make sense how they treat their daughters....i have a friends and her YOUNGER brother could go anywhere and she could only go to places if hes wit her....i just dont get it....and i have a brother thats about 4 years younger than me and he has MUCH more freedom than i do....when i ask my parents why they are like i dont trust the ppl around u.....not my friends but strangers....but they need to open their eyes to the real world a grl as the same risk as a guy for sumthing happening to them..God forbid....it drives me crazy....i have heard egy parents telling their daughter you cant do so and so BECAUSE YOU ARE A GIRL.....whats wrong with hanging out with guys.......when guys get to hang out with girls??????? and no matter how many times i ask a priest or a bishop they cant truly fix it!
  • lol. its actually kind of ironic...my mom is more worried about my brothers than me. i mean they get away wit things, but lil things like they got privileges and stuff at a younger age than i was. she gives them more of a hard time about the clothes they wear and the places they go. girls call them and ask them to go to the movies or bowling, and she goes okay, as long as i can come along. parents have their concerns about each child, and sometimes their kids are great, but they are still afraid of the world around us...keep tryin n good luck :)
  • Yea, parents fear for the boys as well because they don't want to find out one day that their son has already fathered a child because we as orthodox people will take responsibilty, not like these americans, so it is a big deal to them as well. Them meaning the parents.

    sleepy
  • That is the basic idea behind it. If my parents tell me no to something, it because they don't know the people I'm going to be with or the environment I'm going to be in. Parents have full trust in us....or so I hope....lol

    sleepy
  • My favorite line when they don't want you to go somewhere with guys for example the NADY!!! "It's not that I don't trust you, it's that I dont trust them"

    goodness knows how much I hate that line and everytime they say it to me I feel lyk shaving my head, wearing baggy jeans and going as a guy.....u can have the whole entire female generation standing there when ur talking to that guy but it wont matter because hes a BOY and u kno God forbid u acually SPEAK to one another...uugghhh!
  • yea i totalyl agree wiht that lasyt post.... its sooo annoying!!!! >:( i mean honestly... thats a little over the top!
  • uhm, aren't we generalising a bit here?? Guys cant do ANY thing, and from what i see around here, girls can go out, talk to guys and do a lot of things ::)
  • Hos Irof, you're right, guys don't have all the freedom in the world either, but things may be a bit lenient with you guys depending on the parents because they fear for their girls. But nowadays, girls are gaining more privileges, and that may or may not be a good thing.

    sleepy
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