i cant stand him

whywhy
edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
ok heres my situation..

i have this guy from my class who doesnt really care what he says to certain ppl..including my brother who he makes cry (hes 5 yrs) and says crap to my sister n brothers..

besides that hes sayen really annying..whether i do or dont talk to him, whether i ignore or i dont ...that doesnt MAKE A DIFFERENCE

in the first month...it was all ignore him ignore him..


but now its like i cant take it

its now fight fight fight..i even hit him sometimes..

btw he goes on both my buses and is the same age as me..17


i told abouna bout him... n hes like um in his bday or something or special occasions ...send him a card...so he can get a good impression and be on his good side...


so this mornen i was like hey ill make a deal with u..u dont say certain things..or do certain things..and i promise u my family wont interefere with u ..u wont even know we were here...he SAID he agreed////but continued to talk crap the whole day..and i just went back to my old self..the fighting girl that i was before confession.,...




WHAT DO I DOO NOW??? I CANT STAND HIMMMMM!!!

Comments

  • [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg71865#msg71865 date=1180939658]
    ok heres my situation..

    i have this guy from my class who doesnt really care what he says to certain ppl..including my brother who he makes cry (hes 5 yrs) and says crap to my sister n brothers..

    besides that hes sayen really annying..whether i do or dont talk to him, whether i ignore or i dont ...that doesnt MAKE A DIFFERENCE

    in the first month...it was all ignore him ignore him..


    but now its like i cant take it

    its now fight fight fight..i even hit him sometimes..

    btw he goes on both my buses and is the same age as me..17


    i told abouna bout him... n hes like um in his bday or something or special occasions ...send him a card...so he can get a good impression and be on his good side...


    so this mornen i was like hey ill make a deal with u..u dont say certain things..or do certain things..and i promise u my family wont interefere with u ..u wont even know we were here...he SAID he agreed////but continued to talk crap the whole day..and i just went back to my old self..the fighting girl that i was before confession.,...




    WHAT DO I DOO NOW??? I CANT STAND HIMMMMM!!!


    Hi Why,
    Are you talking about Abouna? I wouldnt be surprised. Just pray for him. I know abouna's can do some bad things... but you need to pray and be patient. If that doesnt work, beat the living daylights out of him.
  • If you're going to beat the living daylights out of this person, as Vas so delicately suggested, i would suggest you use your surroundings. For example, you might consider throwing a chair, a table, perhaps even another person willing to cooperate. Also, the sharper the object, the better.  ;D

    In all seriousness though, it's going to get to a point where all you can do is pray for this person. I know what you're feeling right now; i've experienced it, and trust me when i tell you, the more confident you appear, the less interested he will be in messing with you. People such as he act this way because they would much rather bring to light the faults of others than "remove the plank" from their own eyes. You don't have to hit him, but be assertive and aggressive while still maintaining control of yourself. When he begins to see that you are not at all phased by his attacks, he will lose interest. Most of all, however, i stress that you pray; "ask and you will receive."
  • [quote author=EpNomos EnTaio link=topic=5401.msg71869#msg71869 date=1180946084]
    If you're going to beat the living daylights out of this person, as Vas so delicately suggested, i would suggest you use your surroundings. For example, you might consider throwing a chair, a table, perhaps even another person willing to cooperate. Also, the sharper the object, the better.  ;D

    In all seriousness though, it's going to get to a point where all you can do is pray for this person. I know what you're feeling right now; i've experienced it, and trust me when i tell you, the more confident you appear, the less interested he will be in messing with you. People such as he act this way because they would much rather bring to light the faults of others than "remove the plank" from their own eyes. You don't have to hit him, but be assertive and aggressive while still maintaining control of yourself. When he begins to see that you are not at all phased by his attacks, he will lose interest. Most of all, however, i stress that you pray; "ask and you will receive."


    I just wanna say, that if you are talking about Abouna - (it sounds like a typical description of a parish priest), then first be patient and accept that he's just a man also with weaknesses.

    If you are NOT talking about Abouna, and this is someone else, its important to pray for this young man EVEN MORE as he seems to be destined and has all the traits in becoming a priest. Just make sure he doesnt come to France. We're FULLY BOOKED!!!!!

  • i dont apreciate ur sarcastic comments VAs.. i did say he was in my class...so all whatu said was NOT appropriate!! thanks tanious.. i totally forgot about praying for him... yes thats such a great idea...LOL thanks anyway vas![quote author=vassilios link=topic=5401.msg71871#msg71871 date=1180946346]
    [quote author=EpNomos EnTaio link=topic=5401.msg71869#msg71869 date=1180946084]
    If you're going to beat the living daylights out of this person, as Vas so delicately suggested, i would suggest you use your surroundings. For example, you might consider throwing a chair, a table, perhaps even another person willing to cooperate. Also, the sharper the object, the better.  ;D

    In all seriousness though, it's going to get to a point where all you can do is pray for this person. I know what you're feeling right now; i've experienced it, and trust me when i tell you, the more confident you appear, the less interested he will be in messing with you. People such as he act this way because they would much rather bring to light the faults of others than "remove the plank" from their own eyes. You don't have to hit him, but be assertive and aggressive while still maintaining control of yourself. When he begins to see that you are not at all phased by his attacks, he will lose interest. Most of all, however, i stress that you pray; "ask and you will receive."


    I just wanna say, that if you are talking about Abouna - (it sounds like a typical description of a parish priest), then first be patient and accept that he's just a man also with weaknesses.

    If you are NOT talking about Abouna, and this is someone else, its important to pray for this young man EVEN MORE as he seems to be destined and has all the traits in becoming a priest. Just make sure he doesnt come to France. We're FULLY BOOKED!!!!!


  • [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg71876#msg71876 date=1180949387]
    i dont apreciate ur sarcastic comments VAs.. i did say he was in my class...so all whatu said was NOT appropriate!! thanks tanious.. i totally forgot about praying for him... yes thats such a great idea...LOL thanks anyway vas![quote author=vassilios link=topic=5401.msg71871#msg71871 date=1180946346]
    [quote author=EpNomos EnTaio link=topic=5401.msg71869#msg71869 date=1180946084]
    If you're going to beat the living daylights out of this person, as Vas so delicately suggested, i would suggest you use your surroundings. For example, you might consider throwing a chair, a table, perhaps even another person willing to cooperate. Also, the sharper the object, the better.  ;D

    In all seriousness though, it's going to get to a point where all you can do is pray for this person. I know what you're feeling right now; i've experienced it, and trust me when i tell you, the more confident you appear, the less interested he will be in messing with you. People such as he act this way because they would much rather bring to light the faults of others than "remove the plank" from their own eyes. You don't have to hit him, but be assertive and aggressive while still maintaining control of yourself. When he begins to see that you are not at all phased by his attacks, he will lose interest. Most of all, however, i stress that you pray; "ask and you will receive."


    I just wanna say, that if you are talking about Abouna - (it sounds like a typical description of a parish priest), then first be patient and accept that he's just a man also with weaknesses.

    If you are NOT talking about Abouna, and this is someone else, its important to pray for this young man EVEN MORE as he seems to be destined and has all the traits in becoming a priest. Just make sure he doesnt come to France. We're FULLY BOOKED!!!!!





    Well now what makes u think I was being sarcastic? Who am I to assume that he wasnt a priest?? You didnt say that he wasnt a priest.. did u?? and then we shouldnt judge, so i said "if he is a priest then do this...", if he's NOT a priest.. then pray that he doesnt become one!".

    I WAS DEAD SERIOUS DEARIE!
  • [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg71865#msg71865 date=1180939658]
    ok heres my situation..

    i have this guy from my class who doesnt really care what he says to certain ppl..including my brother who he makes cry (hes 5 yrs) and says crap to my sister n brothers..

    besides that hes sayen really annying..whether i do or dont talk to him, whether i ignore or i dont ...that doesnt MAKE A DIFFERENCE

    in the first month...it was all ignore him ignore him..


    but now its like i cant take it

    its now fight fight fight..i even hit him sometimes..

    btw he goes on both my buses and is the same age as me..17


    i told abouna bout him... n hes like um in his bday or something or special occasions ...send him a card...so he can get a good impression and be on his good side...


    so this mornen i was like hey ill make a deal with u..u dont say certain things..or do certain things..and i promise u my family wont interefere with u ..u wont even know we were here...he SAID he agreed////but continued to talk crap the whole day..and i just went back to my old self..the fighting girl that i was before confession.,...




    WHAT DO I DOO NOW??? I CANT STAND HIMMMMM!!!


    i know u were serious but ur comment sould be posted else where.. read my post again and pik on the parts where i made it clear THAT IT WASNT A PRIEsTTT!!!

    ANYWAYS..wat else CAN I DO??
  • [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg71882#msg71882 date=1180950405]
    [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg71865#msg71865 date=1180939658]
    ok heres my situation..

    i have this guy from my class who doesnt really care what he says to certain ppl..including my brother who he makes cry (hes 5 yrs) and says crap to my sister n brothers..

    besides that hes sayen really annying..whether i do or dont talk to him, whether i ignore or i dont ...that doesnt MAKE A DIFFERENCE

    in the first month...it was all ignore him ignore him..


    but now its like i cant take it

    its now fight fight fight..i even hit him sometimes..

    btw he goes on both my buses and is the same age as me..17


    i told abouna bout him... n hes like um in his bday or something or special occasions ...send him a card...so he can get a good impression and be on his good side...


    so this mornen i was like hey ill make a deal with u..u dont say certain things..or do certain things..and i promise u my family wont interefere with u ..u wont even know we were here...he SAID he agreed////but continued to talk crap the whole day..and i just went back to my old self..the fighting girl that i was before confession.,...




    WHAT DO I DOO NOW??? I CANT STAND HIMMMMM!!!


    i know u were serious but ur comment sould be posted else where.. read my post again and pik on the parts where i made it clear THAT IT WASNT A PRIEsTTT!!!

    ANYWAYS..wat else CAN I DO??


    First of all, i found that Hizz_child had really good answers.. But here's my take. I really suggest u wait for her response. I totally feel your pain, and if i was in your shoes, i'd have grabbed the little devil and hung him upside down with his head in the toilet.

    But don't be like me, be like Hizz-Child, she'd have told u to AVOID this person with ALL YOUR HEART, SOUL and MIND.
    Pray for him.
    If he slaps your brother, give him your brother's other cheek too.

    See if he needs anything? Call him to help him with his homework. Be his friend, and invite him to a really nice restaurant.

    For what have u gained if u invite those that invite u. No! Invite this little brat instead.

    I dont know what hizzchild would say, but its best to ask her.

    How old is this boy? If he's OVER 16... i'd spare no mercy. I'd go all the way, and even file a criminal complaint...

    WHY!!!!!!! I GOT THE ANSEWR!!!! ITS SOO EASY!!!

    What this kid has done to you and your brother is awful... right, and your predicament is hard because as a good Chrisitan u don't wish to do anything wrong?? RIGHT???

    Here's the answer:

    Go through the authorities. If he has TOUCHED your brother, that's bullying. In the UK, its a criminal offence. Report it to the police. If he's over 16, he'll be arrested. And cautioned.

    It will scare the living daylights out of him, and frankly, u havent done anything wrong. U've been a christian all the time. Someone is going to pick on your brother, then u need to defend that little one.

    Your story has made me angry, and I DO (HONESTLY) feel for u!!!!!!

    GOOD LUCK SISTER!!!

  • yer i hear you thanks for the advice..but what got hizz_ child into it??
  • [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg71895#msg71895 date=1180959608]
    yer i hear you thanks for the advice..but what got hizz_ child into it??


    She gives pretty good advice. Seriously.

    I'm just telling u what I would do... and i feel your pain, cos If i was in your shoes, i'd be in a worse state!!!

    Hizz child will give u a good "christian" professional response.

  • You gotta use force sometimes like Jesus did in the temple.
  • Get a bat and beat the living crap out of him.
    You gotta use force sometimes like Jesus did in the temple.

    lol but seriously why do not do that itt wil get u suspened------im not sure if u told ur family about this boy, and if you did not then tell them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    pray for the boy..maybe he has family problems or something and he is taking it out on you


    hope i helped,

    pp4m

    EgY
  • LOL thank's for the intro Vas.. I give Christian advice because this is a Christian site, I do not by any means say that 'this is what i would automatically do' but it would be what i try to do. you shouldn't tell people to 'bash' and 'report' others just because it would be your 'automatic' reaction.. stop and think.

    As Vas predicted, I do disagree with his judgement on involving the police.. Having background knowledge on your situation and on this boy [at least who i THINK you're talking about] I would say that the only thing you can do is to pray for him (and obviously try your best not to attack him). He needs help, he needs a friend.. all you can do is offer your love, and pray that he accepts it. I know this advice may be really really hard to accept let alone put into action, but think of it this way, WWJD?? Jesus accepted it, Jesus did not spit back it their faces, Jesus didn't attack them back, He didn't even defend Himself! He is our Role model, and like He did, we should do also.. If you put it in today's terms [and in a less harsh manner], people took Him to court, sentenced Him to death and He didn't even hire a lawyer... He didn't stand up for fairness, equality or any of that stuff.. He just said 'Let Your will be done'. The point is, He DIDN'T try to stop them. Don't let your aim be to fix him, let it be to accept him, love him, pray for him and even though he may hurt you, he doesn't mean what he says... he's buitl up a wall to protect him from rejection and hurt.. hurting other people makes him feel better... when you react to what he does, he is successful.. And so he will do it over and over and over. You don't need him to change, you need you to change. Focus on that.. and you'll be successful.
    +God Bless.
  • I don't think it really matters what i say but i'll say it anyway.

    Your brother is only 5 yrs old, stick up for him! Your 17, you can handle whatever crap he tells you, but not to your brother. Kids (especially at his age) somewhat have a good memory. He can look back at this years from now (if he really does fell upset when this guy comes around) and can be like to you "why didn't you stick up for me when he was verbally harassing me"?

    So, in conclusion, I think you need to defend your brother, but when it comes to you it doesn't matter. And i'll give you an example.

    Anba Abraam, when the government tried to take away acres of land away from the diocese of el-fayoum, he got mad and yelled at the policeman. Then the abouna next to him said "your grace, i never heard you before get mad and yell". He responded and said "this is different, because i'm defending god's right not myself.

    So basically, in all my stupidness, i'm comparing your brother to god, and you to anba abraam. that guy tells you crap-fine, acceptabe, just take it
    However, when it comes to somebody as young as your bro, then you should defend him. Also, ofcourse prayer is important.
    but i have a q for anyone reading this-am i right or wrong? ???
    Pk
  • [quote author=PopeKyrillos link=topic=5401.msg71954#msg71954 date=1181012747]
    I don't think it really matters what i say but i'll say it anyway.

    Your brother is only 5 yrs old, stick up for him! Your 17, you can handle whatever crap he tells you, but not to your brother. Kids (especially at his age) somewhat have a good memory. He can look back at this years from now (if he really does fell upset when this guy comes around) and can be like to you "why didn't you stick up for me when he was verbally harassing me"?

    So, in conclusion, I think you need to defend your brother, but when it comes to you it doesn't matter. And i'll give you an example.

    Anba Abraam, when the government tried to take away acres of land away from the diocese of el-fayoum, he got mad and yelled at the policeman. Then the abouna next to him said "your grace, i never heard you before get mad and yell". He responded and said "this is different, because i'm defending god's right not myself.

    So basically, in all my stupidness, i'm comparing your brother to god, and you to anba abraam. that guy tells you crap-fine, acceptabe, just take it
    However, when it comes to somebody as young as your bro, then you should defend him. Also, ofcourse prayer is important.
    but i have a q for anyone reading this-am i right or wrong? ???
    Pk

    I can't say I agree, of course she should be faithful to her brother, but she should also set a good example for him. If defending her brother means that she should attack this boy, then yes it is wrong.. she can perhaps protect her brother in some other way so he is not affected bywhat this boy is saying but she should not set a bad example.. it's NOT an eye for an eye.. we turn the other cheek. If you mean some other form of defence please say so.
  • [quote author=Hizz_chiilld link=topic=5401.msg71949#msg71949 date=1181004641]
    LOL thank's for the intro Vas.. I give Christian advice because this is a Christian site, I do not by any means say that 'this is what i would automatically do' but it would be what i try to do. you shouldn't tell people to 'bash' and 'report' others just because it would be your 'automatic' reaction.. stop and think.

    As Vas predicted, I do disagree with his judgement on involving the police.. Having background knowledge on your situation and on this boy [at least who i THINK you're talking about] I would say that the only thing you can do is to pray for him (and obviously try your best not to attack him). He needs help, he needs a friend.. all you can do is offer your love, and pray that he accepts it. I know this advice may be really really hard to accept let alone put into action, but think of it this way, WWJD?? Jesus accepted it, Jesus did not spit back it their faces, Jesus didn't attack them back, He didn't even defend Himself! He is our Role model, and like He did, we should do also.. If you put it in today's terms [and in a less harsh manner], people took Him to court, sentenced Him to death and He didn't even hire a lawyer... He didn't stand up for fairness, equality or any of that stuff.. He just said 'Let Your will be done'. The point is, He DIDN'T try to stop them. Don't let your aim be to fix him, let it be to accept him, love him, pray for him and even though he may hurt you, he doesn't mean what he says... he's buitl up a wall to protect him from rejection and hurt.. hurting other people makes him feel better... when you react to what he does, he is successful.. And so he will do it over and over and over. You don't need him to change, you need you to change. Focus on that.. and you'll be successful.
    +God Bless.


    If Hizz CHild disagrees with me then IT MUST BE RIGHT ADVICE!!!

    Heck! After reading her response, EVEN I AGREE WITH HER!!! MAN!!
    SHe's great!!!!
  • thanks hun..n yer its probably who ur thinken bout..our whole skools talken bout him right?? ok MY situation is much better...however... he got seriously introbuel becuase of the same attitude hes given to other people.... they told the principle.. who took away the guys PSP ..and found porno on it..LOL whod figure that..

    thats besides the point..i did pray for him and i MUST SAY..IT WORKS LIKE MAGIC!
  • [quote author=why link=topic=5401.msg72045#msg72045 date=1181129842]
    thanks hun..n yer its probably who ur thinken bout..our whole skools talken bout him right?? ok MY situation is much better...however... he got seriously introbuel becuase of the same attitude hes given to other people.... they told the principle.. who took away the guys PSP ..and found porno on it..LOL whod figure that..

    thats besides the point..i did pray for him and i MUST SAY..IT WORKS LIKE MAGIC!

    Hey, what works like magic? Prayer? So, u prayed for him??

    What i like about your story is that its a clear situation of someone needing prayer and help.  He is obviously a pain to those around him, and has porn on his PSP, its a sign that perhaps he is far from God.

    Imagine if it was a priest?! That would be harder to pray for!!
  • i guess if you want to fight back at him just scream the worst things in the world to him till your lungs fall out but if u decide to settle it the right way:
    when he insults you listen to him but then try really hard not to get mad just be all sarcastic and keep your cool and just be like "do u stay up all night and think of these stupid things to say? cuz that is really pathetic if you do" and if tht doesnt work just beat the crap out of him lol
  • i luv ur advice katz903 lol........
    if a dog barks at u are u going to bark bak???
    there's no point in playin fire wif fire with brick walls gets u no where
  • i bark back.
    you should probably ignore the fact i just said that.
  • [quote author=Hizz_chiilld link=topic=5401.msg72625#msg72625 date=1182079176]
    i bark back.
    you should probably ignore the fact i just said that.

    OH REALLY????? NO WAY!!!!!! i dont suppose you sound like a dog too do u???
    before you make comments read my statements in its context....
    if some one is abusive and insultive to you there is no point in retailiating....it gets you no where...you just go round and round till someone gives up,if anyone will give up.....

    God bless n take care
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