Sexual life in Marriage



  • Two main things you have said;

    1-"...but does that mean I am not allowed to question?"

    2-Concerning the Holy Spirit

    For the first, we do have to questions otherwise we will be lost, but when I say lets obey, I say it as with trust. Meaning, we obey them trusting that they have the better outcome. For instance, Father John the short had been asked by His Father Abba Pemoa to water a wooden stick that was a mile away. Father John would have to carry water and go water a stick that is cut off the root, that is a mile away everyday. and it became a tree, and it is called the tree of obedience. Father John could have said that it is a stick, it is far, it is a waste of time, but he trusted in his guiding Father.

    This brings me to point two; I must not lie, we do have the Holy Spirit, but please be careful with this. The disciples received the Holy Spirit by Jesus Christ during His stay. John 20: 22-23 and than in Acts 2:1-4 TWO DIFFERENT OCCASIONS

    1 When the Day of Pentecost had fully come, they were all with one accord[a] in one place. 2 And suddenly there came a sound from heaven, as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled the whole house where they were sitting. 3 Then there appeared to them divided tongues, as of fire, and one sat upon each of them. 4 And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.

    I can not lie to you but I am still searching this and my Priest was explaining this today to us but it is still not solid in my head for me to explain to you. This is what I am searching The Holy Spirit that Christ our Lord received at Baptism, the Holy Spirit that Jesus blew into the Disciples and The Holy Spirit that the apostles healed with and drew out devils and the Holy Spirit that we receive at Baptism, are they all the same and how do they differ?

    This was what was explained by the priest today was The Holy Spirit that Christ blew into the disciples was the Priesthood and they received the strength on the day of the Pentecost. Now I am guessing this has nothing with the Holy Spirit with Baptism that we receive?...PLEASE I am not claiming that this is true or should anyone believe this but I am still researching it.

    When I mentioned that Father Peter has The Holy Spirit, I mean the Spirit of Priesthood which we do not have.

    Therefore, since I know nothing solid yet about the Holy Spirit, I will dismiss myself from this topic but concerning "that even the elect might be deceived". Can you please help me find this verse, is it in 1 Thessalonians ? and witnesses?

    I am new to this but I do feel that there is tension, I will not judge the case nor take anyone's side because I was not here from the beginning, guessing that this started not just in this topic but I do wish that we can just PRAY AND BRING OUR REQUESTS BEFORE GOD because as much as I feel the tension, I feel that there is a great need of love, which I myself might be lacking during lent

    Pray for me and please forgive me
  • edited May 2019
    some claim.... oral sex is allowed

    Song of Solomon 8:1-2 “O that thou wert as my brother, that sucked the breasts of my mother! when I should find thee without, I would kiss thee; yea, I should not be despised. 2 I would lead thee, and bring thee into my mother’s house, who would instruct me: I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate.”

    Song of Solomon 2:2-3 “Like a lily among the thorns, so is my darling among the maidens. 3 Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste.”

    Song of Solomon 4:15-16 “You are a garden spring, a well of fresh water, streams flowing from Lebanon. Awake, north wind, and come, south wind. 16 Make my garden breathe out, let its fragrance flow. Let my beloved come into his garden, and let him eat its choicest fruits.”

  • User00 quoted an answer by HG Bishop Youssef (fairly well respected authority in the church).

    These issues are not usually addressed directly and clearly, so if you want a longer answer, ask your Father of Confession. His Grace Bishop Youssef states the following:

    Is oral sex, within the bonds of marriage, permitted in the Orthodox Church?

    "Marriage is sacred. Sex is a gift of God to allow the husband and wife to express their love to each other in the most intimate way. It is love full of affection not of lust. Oral sex is an expression of fleshly lust and sinful desires that does not hold sanctity, respect or honor between partners. St. Paul says, "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled" (Heb 13:4)."

    And again:
    Does the sacrament of Matrimony put restrictions on the sexual practices a couple may do to show their love to one another; particularly, the question of oral sex integrity or foreplay? From what I understand, the reason for any type of sexual activity is for either procreation or intimacy. Is there a wrong or right way of making love? Does the Holy Bible say anything about making love a certain way and how literally do we take it?

    "sacrament that is governed by a unique set of rules. It is expected that the married couple will express their emotions of love for one another in an intimately physical manner. These intimate expressions are for procreation, intimacy, and enjoyment by the husband and wife (Proverbs 5:15-20).

    The Lord carefully and beautifully designed the human anatomy in such a way that each member of the body has a special function. No one is at liberty to do as they please with their own body or their spouse's. You can gather, therefore, that even in the context of marriage, there is a fine line between love and lust. Oral, anal, or other deviations of sex is the misuse of one's body and is considered a distortion and perversion of a sexual relationship between husband and wife, based on lust rather than love. If one or both of the spouses do not apply restrictions, they may find themselves later on addicted to such inappropriate stimulation and gratification even within the marriage (1 Thess 4-5).

    Remember, sexuality is based on satisfying a desire and not a need. Fasting is an opportunity to restrict the body from satisfying desires, as well as the basic needs, such as food and water, even for short periods of time. The restrictions for marital intimacy are for the purpose of maintaining chastity and purity for the married couple within the marriage. "But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death" (James 1:14-15)."

    And one more in case the point isn't clear:
    I have always wondered if oral sex is really sex.

    "Sex is not limited to intercourse. There are boundaries for sexual relationships. Some expressions of sexuality are acceptable within a marriage and some are not. Sex outside the marriage is never acceptable. Sometimes, when people want to justify their sexual desires, they negotiate the definition of sex. All activity of acting out sexual desires is sex. Oral sex is definitely a sexual act but an unacceptable one. "For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God" (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5). "For this reason God gave them up to vile passions, for even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature" (Romans 1:26)."

    Note: I did not say anything in this post-- I simply stated what a father of the church has said. As such, I am not sure it is appropriate to argue with the stance of the church, although if you want clarification to understand it, I would talk to your priest.
  • You are right..
    But it is so weird that protestants (and some catholics) claim it is allowed
  • You guys really need to read the Church fathers on this. You'll be suprised. And youll be happy you have a lenient Priest that tries to meet you in a middle ground. One St. John Chrysostom tract and this forum will be shut down. Lol.
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